Mother Yulia Sysoeva is the widow of the missionary priest Father Daniil Sysoev. This woman is the mother of three children, a publicist and the author of many books.
Yulia Sysoeva
writer and publicist
“The wife’s behavior model should not differ from the bride’s behavior model. The bride understands that if she annoys the groom, he will simply turn around and leave, and she will be left with nothing. A wife should behave in the same way as a bride, and not think that she is insured with crowns, seals, and act as if everything is allowed to her.
And the children see everything. They see this hypocrisy and lies, they feel it.”
Mother Yulia - born in 1973 in the Krasnodar region
Yulia was born in 1973, in the Krasnodar region. In 1980, she entered a secondary school in the Leningrad region. Then she moved with her parents to Moscow. And in 1988 she graduated from the 8th grade of a comprehensive Moscow school.
After graduating from school, the girl studied at Moscow Medical School No. 8. At the age of 18, the girl was baptized in the Russian Orthodox Church, after which she made a pilgrimage to the Holy Land in Jerusalem.
The husband supported and helped Yulia in all her endeavors
In 1993, Yulia entered the Sechenov Moscow Medical Academy at the Faculty of Pharmacy. Then, on January 20, 1995, she married seminarian Daniil Sysoev, who was ordained a deacon that same year.
In 2001, Daniil Sysoev became a priest and rector of the Temple of the Prophet Daniel. Yulia’s husband constantly wrote books, he was a public person, and this is what prompted Yulia to write books too.
Yulia Sysoeva herself has said more than once that Daniil advocated for her to always improve, and wanted her life to include more than just children and pots.
“Our only and eternal Motherland is heaven”
Funeral service for the murdered priest Daniil Sysoev.
November 23, 2009 Photo by Deacon Andrei Radkevich “The best death for a Christian, of course, is martyrdom for Christ the Savior. This is the best death that is possible for a person in principle,” wrote Father Daniel in his book, called “Instructions for Immortals, or What to Do if You Still Died.”
He didn’t just want to be saved, he dreamed of martyrdom. “He said that it was wrong to argue that “there’s no way to get into heaven.” He was not content with being “over the edge,” said Yulia Sysoeva.
Father Daniel constantly received threats from radical Islamists, Satanists, etc. When his friends urged him to be careful and reminded him of his children, he replied that the Lord and the Most Holy Theotokos would not abandon the family of the martyr.
“I once asked him: “Don’t you like it here? You do this all the time that everything can collapse at once.” And in response I heard: “And it’s much more interesting there!”,” recalled Archpriest Oleg Stenyaev.
“Our only and eternal Motherland is heaven. Our Father lives there, our fellow citizens are saints there, there the Church will find eternal peace after a long war with the devil,” Father Daniel once said in an interview with Neskuchny Sad magazine.
When Julia wrote her first book, Father Daniel was very happy for her
When Julia wrote her first book, Daniel was very happy for her.
Books by Yulia Sysoeva in the Labyrinth online store
Yulia Sysoeva's first book was published in 2009, it is autobiographical
For some time, Yulia worked with the head of the advertising department in one of the construction companies. At this time, her husband actively helped her come up with advertising slogans and gave her some interesting ideas.
Julia's other books began to gain even more popularity, and she began giving interviews.
When Julia wrote her first book, Daniel was very happy for her. I tried my best to help her in everything.
But on November 20, 2009, the tragic death of her husband, Daniel, occurred, and this is what attracted public attention to this woman. She wrote a lot of articles on this matter and gave many interviews. Currently, Julia has three children: Justina, Dorothea and Angelina.
Husband of Yulia Sysoeva - was shot dead in the temple in 2009
Many people know that Yulia Sysoeva’s husband was shot dead in the church on the night of November 19-20, 2009.
For a long time, Julia did not give any comments about her husband and family. But after a long time, she still decided to answer many questions.
For example, about how they met Father Daniel. Julia calmly replied that in fact the acquaintance was quite simple; she organized a small party at her home. One of my friends suggested taking a good guy with me. Father Daniel was a man with a completely different intellect and mind; then he studied at the seminary, and she graduated from medical school.
For a long time, Mother Julia did not give any comments about her husband and family. But after a long time, she still decided to answer many questions
Then a friend brought Daniel to this party. Everyone understands perfectly well that parties and seminary are completely incompatible concepts, because people who study at theological seminary are already preparing for life with God. And they certainly don’t attend various kinds of events.
Yulia also says that on that day, Father Daniil did not make any impression on her, but Yulia herself made an impression on him. He immediately invited her to meet again, and that’s how the relationship began.
When asked how seminarian Sysoev courted her, she answered like all young people - flowers, cinema and cafes.
The path to religion: biography
Daniil Sysoev was born in January 1974 into a family of Moscow intellectuals. Father and mother worked as teachers and painted.
Daniel converted to Orthodoxy in 1977. The parents tried to observe church customs in the family and baptized their son deliberately. After the child’s initiation into the Orthodox faith, religious aspirations in the family strengthened. They began to participate more often in divine services; for these purposes they attended church, where the head of the family served as an altar boy.
As his son grew older, his father began to take him to work in the church of the Afineevo settlement. Thus, Daniel began to become imbued with the religious Orthodox faith. The boy observed the work of people close to the church, listened to the choral singing at the church, and was interested in prayers and reading the Holy Scriptures. The future priest provided all possible assistance at the church, participated in prayer services, and sang in the choir. This is how the introduction to the Orthodox faith took place.
At the age of fourteen, the young man participated in the restoration of the Novoalekseevsky monastery in Optina Hermitage. There he showed himself as a zealous admirer of the Lord Jesus Christ, which pleased the rector Artemy Vladimirov. He blessed him and advised him to study at the Moscow Theological Seminary.
Three years later, Daniil entered a church educational institution in Moscow. He was a diligent student, he studied many literary works and the Law of God. Daniil Sysoev was appointed reader in 1994. He combined his studies with singing in a choir.
A year before graduating from the seminary, Daniel was ordained to the rank of deacon. The dedication was led by Bishop Eugene of Vereya. Daniel finished seminary well. This made it possible to easily submit documents to the Moscow Theological Academy. He studied there by correspondence.
The marriage of Mother Yulia and Father Daniil was not approved by all sides
Mother also said that she was baptized at the age of 18, and at the age of 21, she had already married Daniel. They knew each other for only 4 months. After this, their daughter Justina was born.
Mother Julia lived with Daniel for fifteen years, and during this time they had three children.
In the photo you can see a happy family
Julia also says that her parents were very hostile to her marriage, and were very outraged that the chosen one was a seminarian, and even from a sacred family.
Yulia’s father was a major businessman and ran a company; he did not understand at all why his daughter chose a man from another world as her husband. The father made his own specific plans for Yulia and looked for a worthy groom for her.
And in the end, Julia had to run away from her parents’ house and secretly get married to her fiancé. The groom's parents were also not at all delighted with their son's choice. But since Julia was still a believer, they accepted the marriage more loyally. But generally the marriage was not received very favorably.
Regents
The regency classes at the seminary were created specifically to give seminarians the opportunity, as they say, to calmly look for brides for themselves without interrupting their work. Here the hierarchy acted very wisely, killing at least three birds with one stone.
Firstly, the student does not need to look for a bride outside the walls of the theological school, being distracted from his studies and spending a lot of precious time on this process.
Secondly, girls entering the regency department, as a rule, are initially religious and consciously strive to become the wives of priests, and this gives at least some guarantees that the wife will not run away from her husband when faced with the hardships of priestly life.
Thirdly, it is very convenient for the Church when the priest is in the altar and the mother is in the choir. She understands not advertising and marketing, but the liturgical charter, chants, voices, kontakion and troparia.
Imagine that a priest is sent somewhere into the eerie wilderness of a village or to the dingy regional town of Tmutarakan, and there in the parish are three dense old women who not only know nothing about worship, but also have no idea what they themselves believe. This is where my mother helps out the priest - not with three higher educations, but a simple one who graduated from the regency school.
As mentioned above, the regency school is mainly attended by girls who want to become wives of priests, or, in church parlance, mothers. In general, in a church environment, being a mother is an honor, but this is not the main reason why believing girls want to be mothers. For them, this is, first of all, a special service to God, to whom they want to devote their lives.
The Regency School is as competitive as a prestigious university - there are so many applicants. Therefore, every year the selection conditions become more stringent. If ten to fifteen years ago almost everyone was recruited, as long as they had hearing, now the presence of a high-quality musical education is welcomed.
The last years of his life, Father Daniel was engaged in the construction of the temple
“For the last three years, my husband has had a marriage with the temple,” said his wife. In recent years he has been building a temple. But Julia does not say that Father Daniel has changed much, he was always a purposeful person, and always strived for the priesthood, but then his priestly service came first, and then everything else - his wife and children.
In the last years of his life, Father Daniel was practically not with his family, as he was building a temple
When the construction of the temple began, he had no time for his family at all, because he could not combine one with the other. He was literally torn to pieces.
Orthodox incubator
— How do you raise your girls? What is most important to you in this regard? “Our people don’t know how to raise children.” There are certain criteria, but there were too many years of godlessness, the people were in Egyptian captivity, and, probably, it should take about the same amount, forty years, to get rid of it. Our grandmothers and mothers, the traditions of Soviet times do not allow the Orthodox family to overcome old stereotypes. I, like everyone else, am in the same situation and I break my spears over the same thing. It seems to me that the emphasis should not be placed on raising a good housewife and wife. It is much more important to give the child the opportunity to become a Christian. Not nominal Orthodoxy, but love in the heart, in the soul for Christ. It seems to me that if a girl puts God first, then she doesn’t need to be specifically hammered into it that “she needs an Orthodox husband, a pious one” - she simply won’t be able to choose an unbelieving husband. Maybe I'm idealizing, I don't know. But what will she talk to him about, what can she have in common with an unbelieving guy? Of course, miracles happen, maybe he will be converted through her. But this is rather an exception to the rule. There is a “caring hen syndrome” that wants to protect the child from all dangers. And this happens not only because parents are afraid for the child, that he will not resist “worldly” temptations. Such a natural desire is to protect from a bad school or company, and I do this. Of course, I don’t want my daughter to communicate with girls who only have cigarettes and parties on their minds. Although she sees how girls and boys communicate, and knows that she is close enough. I tell her that you’ll only ruin your life this way, you won’t save it for your loved one, even if you’re curious, you’ll get such an aftertaste... It’s impossible to raise a child in a greenhouse, put him in an “Orthodox” incubator, where teachers, doctors, and a camp are all only Orthodox. I watched girls, and boys too, who grew up in very strict and closed Orthodox families, where they never watched TV, never wore trousers, and there was no social interaction. When they reached freedom, they immediately threw off their long skirts and ran to parties. My eldest daughter had a period when she was very eager to join various companies that were not useful to her, she even had a dream - to go to a nightclub. I gave her this opportunity: “Please go and have a cocktail.” She found reliable friends with whom she went out. And he says to me: “Listen, mom, it’s completely uninteresting. I looked at it - so what?” — How does a priest’s family differ from a family of “ordinary believers” who also expect to live together until the end of their days? “If the husband belongs to the family, works for the family, then the priest can no longer do that. He is busy in the service and cannot serve to earn money to provide for his family. He does not belong to his children or his wife. Even a very busy businessman can sometimes turn off his phone and just go somewhere with his family. The priest cannot do this. In one family I know, the husband has a little-demanded specialty, and the wife has a high-paying job, and she cannot afford up to three years of leave to care for a child. It turns out that the husband spends more time with the child, this is their choice. But in the family of a priest this is impossible. - And especially for a mother with many children... - Children consume more effort, and the husband consumes more emotional energy. I am not a good teacher: I don’t know how to organize puppet theaters, draw with them, etc. Therefore, for me, caring for children occurs at the level of taking, bringing, washing, feeding. And a husband is spiritual communication, you wait for him in the evening from the service, from work. It turns out that this is where realization occurs - either you don’t want to go beyond the boundaries of such a life, or you want to, but there’s simply no possibility. But rather, you don’t want to, because you feel satisfied, fulfilled, and spin around like a squirrel in a wheel.
Yulia Sysoeva’s husband was also involved in missionary projects
It is also worth saying that Yulia Sysoeva’s husband was also involved in missionary projects. He organized Bible studies, and all this took up even more of his time.
In 2008, Father Daniel created a missionary school at the Church of St. Thomas the Apostle. His official life occupied a lot of his time.
In 2008, Father Daniel created a missionary school at the Church of St. Thomas the Apostle
Mother Yulia recalls that she and her husband loved to travel by car. They traveled a lot around Russia and went abroad many times. The role of the driver always remained with the wife, and Father Daniil acted as a navigator. He only started using the car in the last two years of his life.
He didn't want tolerance
Class with missionaries.
February 2008. Photo by Ekaterina Zagulyaeva “There were no authorities for him: he could publicly, without fear of anything, argue with any person, even with a professor, if he believed that he was mistaken in something,” recalls Archpriest Dionisy Pozdnyaev.
Seminarian Daniil Sysoev could get involved in a discussion even during a lecture, for which he was sometimes punished. But this did not stop him from starting theological disputes again and again.
Then in his life there were thousands of meetings, broadcasts, debates, round tables. He participated in discussions with Muslims, sectarians, and neo-pagans. In his youth, as his wife put it, he “boiled with zeal for God”; later he learned to argue more calmly. But he always remained disconcertingly straightforward.
“He did not want tolerance, did not want Christ to be put on the same level as Mohammed, Buddha or Jehovah and to be prayed to,” recalled Fr. Alexy Sysoev, father of the priest.
Many things related to other faiths, sins or misconceptions are not customary to say out loud. But Father Daniel always finished his thoughts to the end. And speaking, for example, at a scientific conference, he could say that science should be the “handmaiden of theology.”
Thanks to his recklessness, Father Daniel gained some scandalous fame. One Muslim journalist even contacted the prosecutor's office demanding that a case be opened against him for inciting interreligious and ethnic hatred.
During his life, Father Daniel baptized more than eighty Muslims, including several Wahhabis and two people who were going to become martyrs. And more than five hundred Protestants.
As in many Orthodox families, parents would like their children to follow in their footsteps
As in many Orthodox families, parents would like their children to follow in their footsteps. But Julia said that Father Daniel wanted the girls to simply be believers. The eldest daughter, for example, wanted to become a journalist and her father supported her well in this.
Father Daniil could often fool around and have fun, and encouraged his children to pamper themselves
She also often recalls that the priest could very often fool around and have fun, and encouraged his children to pamper themselves. Since he had an easy character, he got along with people very easily, he had a lot of friends, and people were constantly drawn to him.
He painted mountains, hermit cells and the sky
“We went to the monastery from the opposite side from the entrance, went out onto the slope, and from there we saw the monastery.
It was sunset, and we all thought we were seeing the real Jerusalem. ...We knew for sure that it was him. And Father Daniel sang the stichera “May God rise again, and His enemies be scattered... Shine, shine, New Jerusalem,” recalled one of the friends, Fr. Daniil Sysoev about a pilgrimage trip to the New Jerusalem Monastery. “It was autumn... We stood in front of the New Jerusalem, and Father Daniel sang about it, and we contemplated this beauty.” As a child, the future priest drew unknown countries, where there were mountains, waterfalls, hermit cells, and below - villages with people. Processions of the cross took place through the streets, and in each village there were several churches.
“The main thing is space, the sky. It was constantly present to him with some incredible sparkle,” recalls Fr.’s mother. Daniila Sysoeva, Anna Midkhatovna. The preschooler knew the book about saints “Byzantine Legends” practically by heart.
During Easter services, Father Daniel radiated so much joy that it overwhelmed all his parishioners. But even on the most ordinary days, he constantly smiled and laughed. According to many of Father Daniil’s friends, he did not like loneliness, he easily became the life of the party, and guests often came to his house. People who knew him closely enough remember the “childish simplicity” of Father Daniel.
Father Daniel - foresaw his death
The late father Daniel had a presentiment of his death. Three years ago he went to see an elder, and he predicted that Daniel would build his own temple, but would not serve in it.
That is why in recent years he was simply in a hurry to live, he constantly said that he was afraid that he would not have time to do everything he had planned. But Julia herself considered these statements to be foolishness.
When he built his temple, it was as if he was waiting for his imminent death. After his death, Yulia recalls one incident when a linen vestment was sewn for the priest, and he said in all seriousness that he wanted to be buried in this vestment. When he said this, Julia tried not to react.
In the last years of her life, Julia’s husband often spoke about his imminent death.
Julia remembers how she had a ring that had not been removed for many years; she brought it from the holy land. As she walked along the road to the cemetery, a purple bouquet of irises fell at her feet; these were the flowers that Daniel brought her on her first date.
The cemetery road was strewn with various flowers, but there were no irises among them, and then Yulia realized that it was a bouquet from her husband. And then, she decided to give him a gift. I decided to give this very ring to him. She took it off and put it in his hand.
About marriage
A woman’s natural aspiration is family, children. It seems to many that their unfulfillment lies in the fact that they cannot find a life partner, but the Apostle Paul: “Rejoice always. In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18) And if a person begins to become despondent and say that his life is not working out, we must remember these words about gratitude.
At the same time, it is clear that the Gospel says “And I will say to you: ask, and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you, for everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened” (Luke 11:9-10). Therefore, if a girl really really wants to get married, she probably needs to pray about it and ask the One who has everything in his hands.
But they pray and do not receive when they ask for no benefit. If a woman prays fervently and really breaks her forehead, but there is no groom, then you should think about whether this is not her path. And then you have to somehow humble yourself, submit, and understand that perhaps the Lord will ward off the worst. There have been so many examples of people begging for suitors and then regretting it.
At the same time, if a woman approaches the mirror with a sad look, looks there and says to herself “I’m ugly, no one needs me, God, send me a groom,” then this is some kind of nonsense. I, too, have come across women who constantly whine: “Well, who needs me anymore? My time has already passed.” But if a woman perceives herself in this way, then everyone will look at her as a worthless person. She has this attitude written all over her face! She has a dull look, a sad expression on her face, she stops taking care of herself. And what normal person would want to live with such a gray moth?
Of course, it can be very difficult to gain strength and say to yourself: “Enough is enough, it’s time to change something.” This is much more difficult than constantly complaining about life, whining and looking for someone to blame. Grooms don't just fall from the sky.
Paradoxically, it is often those who do not seem to be looking for or expecting it who get married happily. At the same time, they can pray, ask God to send them a good groom, if it is His will, but at the same time they do not get hung up on marriage. And men feel this situation very well, when a woman dreams of throwing herself on her neck and sucking on her like a vampire, they try to run away from such people. It is important to behave competently and wisely, because there are basics of behavior for women.
Young people before death were never able to say goodbye
It is very difficult to remember the death of Julia’s husband. The young people did not have time to say goodbye to each other. Shortly before her death, Yulia said that Daniil Sysoev received threats, but he never got into trouble.
He had no problems, but many thought that there might be a problem with the land where the temple is located. The go-ahead for the construction of the temple was given, but only in words. I had to write a bunch of papers, which took quite a lot of time.
Currently, the Sysoev family celebrates the day of the death of Father Daniil - as the day of his birth and victory
Some authorities wanted to take away the land on which the temple stood, but Daniel, having greatly undermined his health, defended his land.
Currently, the day of the death of Father Daniel is celebrated by his family with his birthday and victory.
About the fund
We organized the charitable foundation “Missionary Center named after Priest Daniil Sysoev”, the purpose of which is to help priestly families and widows of priests. In our country there are many specialized funds that help, for example, children with cancer or the homeless. But there was no place where priestly families in trouble could turn.
Some people think that such families can be helped by the parish, but this is not so. There are parishes that are so poor, there are widows of priests and deacons who, quite quickly after the death of their spouse, stop helping or completely forget about them.
We deal with each situation personally, find out the needs of the family, and practice an individual approach, because everyone’s needs are different, everyone’s problems are different.
It is clear that all problems cannot be solved with money, but now a lot depends on money: repairs, treatment, recreation for children. At the same time, of course, we can provide moral support. Mothers may feel that in difficulties, with the death of their spouse, they were not forgotten, they were not abandoned, and they are interested in their life. In a crisis situation, it is very important to understand that there is some organization that is not indifferent to their grief.
