Chastity is a moral virtue, a state of mind and body of an individual in which he chooses for himself bodily and spiritual purity. Currently, the meaning of chastity is partly forgotten and for many it is even ridiculous and unnecessary. The state of affairs is such that every year the technological progress of society provides more and more opportunities for younger generations to avoid censorship from adults, parents and teaching mentors. But at the same time, little is given of the foundations and concepts of moral values, such as nobility, honor, chastity, modesty. To be such in today's reality, especially in megacities, is almost equal to the inability to survive. However, each of us has the opportunity to choose what we should be. A conscious choice in favor of virtues may not bring wealth and fame, but it will give you the opportunity to remain yourself.
Chastity in prose[edit]
Virginity is a matter so great and wonderful that it surpasses all human virtues. Virginity adorned the first people more than kings with diadems and golden robes
What is more honest, sweeter, more radiant than virginity? For it emits a radiance more brilliant than the sun’s rays, and, having detached us from everything worldly, it teaches us to attentively contemplate the sun of truth with bright eyes. Like precious myrrh, although it is contained in a vessel, filling the air with fragrance, it brings pleasures not only to those inside the house, but also to those standing around it; so the fragrance of a virgin soul, intoxicating the senses, reveals the virtue hidden within.
— John Chrysostom
| The cult of girlhood was not established by women - because in these matters they are much wiser than men. |
| — Lorenzo Valla |
| It is easy, for example, to forgive your enemies when you happen to not have enough intelligence to be able to harm them, and it is also easy not to seduce women if you are endowed with a very unsightly nose. — Preface to the first part of the “Salon”, translation by A. Fedorov |
| Es ist zB leicht, daß man seinen Feinden verzeiht, wenn man zufällig nicht so viel Geist besitzt, um ihnen schaden zu können, so wie es auch leicht ist, keine Weiber zu verführen, wenn man mit einer allzu schäbigen Nase gesegnet ist. |
| — Heinrich Heine |
| Naivety is the cousin of innocence and the cousin of stupidity. |
| — Paul Decourcel |
| Heaven always protects innocence! |
| — Pierre Beaumarchais |
| It's not too hard to be an angel if you're asexual. |
| — Leszek Kumor |
| Innocence is the ideal of those who love to deflower. |
| — Karl Kraus |
| Innocence is an awakening sensuality that does not yet understand itself. |
| — Friedrich Goebbel |
| While the sugar melted on the knife and the sweet drops fell into the green moisture, Venichka thought about how wonderful chastity is and how terrible sensual pleasures are. “Poor Shurochka cannot indulge in pure contemplation, because her blood is poisoned by lust and she has forgotten what happiness it is to be innocent.” At this time, Venichka looked at his absinthe and blushed. Several times he promised himself not to drink this drunken poison... |
| — Georgy Chulkov, “Shurochka and Venya”, 1913 |
| Unbridled sensuality leads to the belief that the world is meaningless. Chastity, on the contrary, returns meaning to the world. |
| — Albert Camus |
| Chastity is the law for women, while in men they value depravity above all else. Isn't it funny? |
| — Luc de Clapier Vauvenargues |
| Chaste is the one whom no one desired. |
| — Ovid |
| Chastity is the most unnatural of all sexual perversions. |
| — Aldous Huxley |
Chastity in verse[edit]
| You are too sweet for innocence, And you are too kind to love! You could give happiness to half the world, But you yourself cannot be happy. |
| — Mikhail Lermontov, “You are too sweet for innocence...”, 1831 |
| The day faded, graceful and innocent, Evening peeked through the lace. And over the ancient book My head began to spin. |
| — Alexander Blok, “The day has faded, graceful and innocent...”, 1904 |
| They grow as a couple, my tender ones, my narrow ones, my long ones, motionless and rebellious, tightly compressed and innocent... |
| — Zinaida Gippius, “Cypresses”, 1911 |
| In hours of unjustified suffering and unresolved battle, chastity of silence is needed and, perhaps, quiet prayers. |
| — Zinaida Gippius, “Hush,” 1914 |
| The joy of all innocent eyes, - Everyone is amazed! - I was born into this world - To be happy! |
| — Marina Tsvetaeva, “The Joy of All Innocent Eyes...”, 1914 |
| And we, having covered them from unnecessary faces with a caring shed, deprive the slightly alarmed girls of their innocence. |
| — Georgy Obolduev, “Inflaming our blood...”, 1926 |
Sins against chastity
Sins against chastity are considered in the context of the interpretation of one of the Ten Commandments of Moses, “You shall not commit adultery.” Any sexual activity outside of marriage is considered a departure from the virtue of chastity, which in church tradition correlates with this commandment. Specifically, the compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church states:
Chastity in marriage is traditionally understood as marital fidelity, as well as abstinence from sexual practices considered “unnatural” or “perverted” in Christianity; chastity for unmarried people is sexual abstinence. Accordingly, a distinction is made between sins against chastity, which have no relation to marriage, and sins against chastity, which violate the dignity of marriage. For example, the Catechism of the Catholic Church states:
The idea that any sin related to sexuality is a special case of violating the commandment “thou shalt not commit adultery” is associated with the words of Jesus from the Sermon on the Mount: “You have heard that it was said to the ancients: You shall not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:27-30).
"Sexual Revolution"
The reason that now a virgin is a very rare phenomenon is a turning point in public consciousness in the middle of the 21st century. The “sexual revolution” - the lot of the 1960s - caused a lot of trouble. This happened due to a change in ideas about morality. As a result, many took advantage of the opportunity provided by contraception. After all, it was then that they began to spread, which made it safer to have frequent sex, and moreover, with different sexual partners. The idea of morality at that time among most people was that sex before marriage is normal, and if you protect yourself, you can protect both yourself and your partners from trouble. But contraceptives to this day do not have the ability to protect both from sexually transmitted diseases and from pregnancy 100%.
Until the 20th century, a significant part of society identified morality with Christianity. Afterwards, with the harsh socialist regime, a completely different worldview came to many things, although chastity was a component of this philosophy. However, society itself began to rank values differently by level of significance, gradually placing virginity at one of the lowest levels. But it paid very dearly for this: today, debauchery, the collapse of family values, divorces, perversions, which include pedophilia, bestiality, abortion, homosexuality, sexually transmitted diseases, infertility, pornography, etc., are replete with events for one person. Modern man has already partially realized where the reason for his constant troubles regarding family and marital relations lies, and today, relative to 1960, chastity is something that, at least, one can already be proud of.
What is celibacy
In most religious denominations and in some spiritual movements, there is a vow of celibacy, which is given by those who decide to devote their lives to serving God or their favorite cause. This means that a person takes a conscious step towards pacifying his flesh, which is dictated either by spiritual aspirations or external conditions.
Origin of the word
The term comes from the Latin caelibatus, which translates as “unmarried.” The practice of abstinence dates back thousands of years and has been practiced throughout the world. There are examples from the ancient Hindu epics when not only brahmins, but also legendary heroes promised God that they would renounce family life in the name of achieving the inner strength of piety.
It is also known that the ancient Roman Vestals - priestesses of Vesta, who was the goddess of love, also made a similar vow. Its violators were buried alive in the ground.
Meaning of the concept
Anyone who takes this path pursues certain goals. Some see this as a necessary condition for acquiring spiritual strength and preserving it in the name of improvement. This is what Buddhist monks do.
For others, this is a kind of official necessity. For example, in the tradition of the Western Church, celibacy refers to compulsory celibacy among the Catholic clergy (with the exception of deacons). A similar phenomenon exists in Orthodoxy, where only monastics and those priests who do not have a family can become bishops.
The meaning of this concept is different for each practitioner, depending on what he carries in his heart while fulfilling this vow.
Celibacy for women and men
For both men and women, this method eliminates the obstacle in the form of a family on the path to God or another goal, which switches a person’s main attention and takes up a significant part of his time and energy. People who see the meaning of their lives in serving God or a favorite cause can turn to this practice to remove from their path everything that prevents them from moving towards the highest truth in their understanding
There are many men and women who do not commit themselves to religious vows of celibacy, but in fact lead a lifestyle that partially or completely corresponds to such a vow. For some, this is associated with social activities, for others - with characteristics of character and temperament. Some, through the pacification of the flesh, discover new spiritual horizons in themselves, finding their purpose in serving people.
But there are still differences in the practice of this method by men and women. This is primarily due to the structure of their internal natures.
For men:
- energy moves upward, trying to embrace the unknown;
- the tendency to comprehend life using logic, including all one’s mental potential in this process (to live according to one’s mind);
- the main activity manifests itself outside the personal system; a man needs society for self-expression;
- scale of action.
A woman's energy moves closer to the ground
Her consciousness tries to cover with attention the little to which she is able to give love and support. She understands the world with her feelings and heart, does not try to save the whole world, but is able to warm those who are truly dear to her
Religion's attitude to chastity and celibacy
In world religions and other faiths there are such concepts as chastity and vows of bodily restrictions necessary to maintain purity and purity. However, they are treated differently.
In Orthodoxy
Marriage is permitted if it precedes the ordination of deacon and priest. This provision was enshrined in the rules of the Sixth Ecumenical Council. But only those chosen from among the celibate (black) clergy - monks of the minor schema - can rise to the rank of bishop in Orthodoxy. Both in the Russian Orthodox Church and in other local churches, the bishop is chosen only from among the monks.
In Orthodoxy, marriage is encouraged when abstinence is impossible, and renunciation of family relationships, and the vow of celibacy can be taken both for a certain period and for life.
In Catholicism
Among Catholics, this vow was finally established in the ninth century. It contains an injunction that priests must maintain chastity. If someone violates this condition, he is considered to be committing sacrilege.
Pastors are prohibited not only from getting married, but also from being in a previously concluded union. After ordination to the priesthood, all attempts to marry a woman are considered invalid.
As an exception, in the Catholic Church, family men who converted to Catholicism from Anglicanism or Protestantism, where they were clergy, can be ordained priests. Mandatory observance of this rule also does not apply to Greek Catholics and members of the clergy of the Eastern Catholic Churches under the jurisdiction of the Pope.
In Protestantism
In Protestantism and Anglicanism, preference is given to married clergy. The right of the clergy to marry is based on the natural conditions of human nature.
By the way, it is Protestant countries that are ahead of Catholic countries in all development ratings, and even more so Orthodox countries, where there are plans to abandon the institution of the family, which is a natural formation.
In other religions
In Judaism, the attitude towards celibacy is purely negative, since it contradicts the direct biblical instructions: to be fruitful and multiply. A man without a family is considered half a man here.
Judaism does not accept abstinence as a means to perfection and attainment of holiness, but views celibacy as an obstacle to personal spiritual growth.
Here it is appropriate to quote the statement of the Nobel Prize winner in chemistry Michael Levitt, who, when asked why so many Jews receive this award, answered with humor that in a Christian family a smart boy is sent to become a monk, and in a Jewish family such a child is given advice so that he finds the best a beautiful woman and married her.
In Islam, marriage and family are the foundation. The concept of neglecting family ties in the name of self-development, including the use of abstinence from interaction with the opposite sex, contradicts Sharia law and is absolutely alien to the culture of Muslims in any of its manifestations.
Despite the conflicting views of representatives of different faiths, the truth on the issue of celibacy is usually somewhere in the middle. Undoubtedly, there are rational roots in any of the considered opinions, and everyone is free to choose what is closest to his soul.
How to Cultivate Chastity
According to John Cassian, without a life position based on humility in the heart, one cannot put on chastity. We can force ourselves by force of will to observe fasts, go hungry, constantly work and remain in prayer, but we can never acquire purity, for it is given only by the Creator by His great mercy.
Only the Savior can free us from passions, seeing ourselves constantly engaged in the struggle of faith and humility. To acquire this virtue, Christians must crave purity, just as a greedy person overcomes everything for the sake of wealth, and a lover who is ready to overcome all obstacles on the way to his beloved. It is also necessary to fight passions.
Only an insatiable desire to become blameless in the eyes of the Creator and Savior, a willingness to sacrifice food, drink and even sleep, to renounce insidious seductive thoughts, can fill a Christian with chastity.
This feat can be accomplished only by the grace of the mercy of the Almighty God. To achieve chastity, you do not need severity towards yourself, but love for God and the ability to enjoy your own sincere purity.
About chastity
How to maintain chastity
It is difficult to maintain chastity in the modern world; fornication has become the norm. On every corner you can hear that “a stamp in a passport does not change anything in a relationship,” that you need to “check your feelings and live together,” and so on. Moral and moral values give way to momentary pleasures. But this is only in the case when there is no clear understanding of why and for what it is necessary to remain clean.
For a person who believes in God and lives according to the commandments, it is obvious: fornication is a serious sin. You not only have to pay for it with your health, but you will also inevitably have to answer to God. By entering into illegal intimate relationships, a person sins against himself, distorting the “image and likeness of God” inherent in human nature. And virginity is God’s gift, preserving which preserves the best that we have. Therefore, you need to clearly understand that any intimate relationship before marriage is a sin.
A girl who wishes to remain chaste until marriage should behave accordingly:
- dress modestly. This doesn't mean you need to cover yourself from head to toe. But wearing clothes that are obviously tempting to men should absolutely not be worn. By the way, those young ladies who wear chaste attire have a better chance of finding worthy husbands than those who dress provocatively;
- behave modestly;
– do not be alone with men in ambiguous situations;
– respect yourself as God’s beloved creation and do not allow yourself to be taken advantage of;
– strive to become a worthy wife, a gentle mother.
Moral purity is a manifestation of strong character. That core that allows you to defend Christian views on life, in which sin is called sin. Chastity is Divine light, in which there is no place for debauchery, foul language, deception and many other sins. Of course, it is difficult for a chaste person to live in the modern world. But such a person knows why he keeps his body, the temple of his God-given soul, clean. He knows why he protects his body from fornication. And he certainly receives a reward from the Lord for his labors and the feat of a chaste life.
Islam
The Islamic attitude towards celibacy was complex, Muhammad condemned it, but some Sufi orders accept it. Islam does not encourage celibacy; rather, it condemns premarital sex and extramarital sex. In fact, according to Islam, marriage allows a person to achieve the highest form of righteousness within this sacred spiritual bond, and as such it should be sought and desired. This is inconsistent with the concept that marriage acts as a form of distraction in achieving closeness to God. The Koran (57:27) says: “But We did not enjoin upon them monasticism, which they invented for themselves, but only to please God, but they did not observe it properly.”
Celibacy is a feature of some Sufis.
In Sufism, holy women practiced celibacy. Celibacy was discussed along with the role of women in Sufism during the Middle Ages.
Celibacy, poverty, meditation and mysticism in an ascetic context, along with worship centered around the tombs of saints, were promoted by the Qadiri Sufi order among Hui Muslims in China. In China, unlike other Muslim sects, the leaders (sheikhs) of the Qadiriyya Sufi order are celibate. Unlike other Sufi orders in China, leadership within the order is not a hereditary position, rather one of the celibate Sheikh's disciples is chosen by the Sheikh to succeed him. Celibate Sheikh Yang Shijun, 92, has been the leader of the Qadiriya order in China since 1998.
Celibacy is practiced by the Sufi dervishes of Haydaria.
Meher Baba
Spiritual master Meher Baba stated that “or a seeker, a life of strict chastity is preferable to married life if self-restraint comes easily to him without excessive feelings of self-suppression. Such restraint is difficult for most people and sometimes impossible, and for them married life is clearly more beneficial than celibacy. For ordinary people, married life is undoubtedly recommended, unless they have a special inclination towards celibacy.” Baba also stated that “The value of celibacy lies in the habit of self-restraint and the sense of detachment and independence which it gives” and that “the aspirant must choose one of the two paths that are available to him. He must accept life. celibacy or married life, and he must avoid at all costs a cheap compromise between them. Promiscuity in sexual gratification will inevitably lead the aspirant into the most miserable and dangerous chaos of uncontrollable lust.”
Forms of chastity
Another misconception is that this phenomenon only applies to premarital relationships, when in fact it exists in marriage, widowhood and virginity.
Spouses
It is understood as fidelity between spouses, in which there is no resort to unnatural sexual practices. In this case, the woman’s wisdom is complemented by the man’s cleared mind.
This form of marital virtue implies mutual purity not only in actions, but also in thoughts, and this applies not only to the sexual sphere. Mutual marital fidelity and respect for one's other half is the key to virtuous offspring, who will absorb the love and purity of their parents.
Widowhood
This form involves maintaining fidelity to the deceased spouse, preserving the image of the deceased in the soul or filling one’s heart with love for God.
There are many examples when people who have lost a loved one realized the temporary nature of earthly separation before the coming eternal union in heaven. Thus, they strengthened their feelings of love and devotion many times over, compared to those they had experienced before, during this person’s life.
Virginity
This is the preservation of one’s innocence and integrity before entering into a marital relationship, both on the part of the girl and on the part of the boy. Integrity here is meant in the same way as maintaining the period of maturation, cultivating spiritual inner strength, which in its pure form can be passed on to one’s children.
It is important not to spill your spiritual strength, not to lose the ability to love with all your heart, to maintain the refinement of feelings, and to convey this full cup to the one for whom it is intended. There are many examples when people at first adhered to open relationships without obligations and any tender feelings, and later wanted to love their one and only, whom they finally met, but could not, since they had long ago spent all the strength of their soul
The cult of the body provoked his collapse
The condom has been considered an excellent and affordable means of protection since the 1960s. However, according to official statistics, 40% of Americans infected with HIV became infected through a condom. Back then, they somehow didn’t think about the fact that infection occurs not only through sperm, but also through secretions from the genitals.
In general, when a virus enters the body, it not only settles in it, but also changes, i.e. modified and can cause trouble throughout life.
Women are much more at risk of infection than men. And they also cause more damage to them. For example, the probability of contracting gonorrhea in women compared to men is 60-90%, while in the former it is 20-30%. Chlamydia has no symptoms, but, in turn, is the cause of infertility and dangerous pregnancy. Syphilis, in addition to the genital organs, affects the blood vessels of the brain, and also has a negative effect on the heart, causing ulcers and psychosis.
Gonorrhea causes pelvic inflammation and also infertility. Genital herpes threatens the death of the fetus; it is a difficult to treat disease. If in the early 1960s there were only two sexually transmitted diseases, now there are about forty. As a result, millions of people around the world are infected with them every year. Of 100% of sexually active young people, 40% become infected with the human papillomavirus, as well as chlamydia, and of all 40 diseases, young people under 25 years of age are among those who suffer from them.
Concept in church tradition
In the Christian religious tradition, chastity is understood as the meaning of abstinence from illegal sexual actions and thoughts, as well as generally as modesty in relationships in a broad sense: in views, speech, clothing.
Saint Ignatius Brianchaninov explains the concept of chastity this way:
If we do not give this word, as is often done, only its sexual, secondary meaning, then it must be understood as the positive opposite of the spirit of idleness. Idleness, first of all, means dispersion, division, fracturedness of our opinions and concepts (spiritual charm), our energy, the inability to see things as they are, in their whole. The opposite of idleness is precisely integrity. If chastity is usually considered a virtue opposite to sexual depravity, this is only due to the fact that the brokenness of our existence expresses itself nowhere more than in sexual depravity, in the alienation of the life of the body from the life of the spirit, from spiritual control. Christ restored integrity in us, restored the true hierarchy of values, bringing us back to God. The first wonderful fruit of this integrity or chastity is humility.
Vow of chastity
The vow of chastity is made directly to God and is considered irrevocable. Anyone who has made such a vow no longer has the right to marry and have children, as well as to have sex forever. Both men and women can take the vow of chastity, both in monasticism and in the world. Monasticism, as well as monasticism, is translated as “solitary, solitary living.”
There are also similar concepts: asceticism (from the Greek “exercise”), as a type of spiritual practice, the purpose of which is to achieve a certain spiritual state or acquire supernatural abilities, is recognized in all religions and cultures; celibacy (literally “celibacy”), brahmacharya - sexual abstinence; self-control over desires, the desire for purity of thoughts, words and deeds always and under all circumstances.
The vow of chastity is perhaps one of the most difficult vows, since it goes against the very nature of man. Those who choose this path will face many temptations and difficulties in curbing their natural desires.
You need to be sexually active before marriage to determine “compatibility”
Sexual compatibility is truly a myth. A woman's vagina is indifferent to the size of her penis. It can adjust to the size of the baby during childbirth and the small male genital organ and experience pleasure during intercourse. Pleasure in this context is not at all correlated with the concept of the size of something. Some people are only turned on by small breasts, others only by fat women. Although this is typical for falling in love, it is not for love.
Sexual arousal does not depend on the size of the breasts, penis, etc. For each person, this occurs purely according to individual criteria, not in relation to any generally accepted norm. When they talk about compatibility, they can emphasize the aspect that there is compatibility of temperaments. But with the small amendment that if a person craves some special poses, considering it impossible to fully satisfy the desire through ordinary caresses, while in sexual contact with his beloved, then, apparently, he is a bit of a pervert and, perhaps, quite addicted to porn.
It is also quite absurd to enter into or break off a relationship simply because of “sexual compatibility,” even if it existed in nature.
What is chastity in Orthodoxy
In the mass consciousness, chastity is associated with the refusal of sexual relations in general, this means entering into monasticism, or maintaining purity both before and during marriage. In the pre-Christian period, people who sinned in fornication were tied by their hands and feet to the ground and thrown with stones. Let us remember the harlot who was brought to Jesus for judgment. The priests demanded execution, and only the wise and merciful command of Christ saved the woman from death.
Many parents and their children have gone astray, which means they have accepted fornication as the norm in this matter. For some reason, some mothers allow their sons to have physical fun on the side, but they only want to accept a virgin as a daughter-in-law.
Outside of marriage, chastity is associated with maintaining virginity, and in marriage – with maintaining marital fidelity
The Kingdom of Heaven will not apply to those who limit themselves only to food, observing fasts, but do not lead a chaste life, which is based on the shame of falling into debauchery.
Only the deep-rooted concept of a chaste life can protect and strengthen the soul of a Christian
For a church-going Christian, it is important to understand that “I want” and “I can” do not always apply to chaste people. You cannot desire the body of another person, to whom you have no responsibility, no respect, moving only by instincts, then the person is comparable to cattle
You can’t just have a person, you have to love him! Fornication erases all boundaries of decency, the world recognizes the right of gays and lesbians to demonstrate feelings, for this sin the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah were burned by God.
True love, which believes everything and covers everything (Cor. 13), was replaced by lustful desires, removing the concept of chastity and innocence from life.
The teaching of Christ revealed to the world the truth of virginity through the example of the Most Pure Virgin Mary and the behavior of the saints. Living according to God’s commandments and following Christ’s instructions becomes chaste, protected from sinful thoughts and deeds.
Important! Every Christian can repent of fornication and cleave to the virgin life of a true Christian
From calorie counting to eating disorders
Food is associated with millions of taboos, like anything that can greatly influence the body and emotions. On the one hand, the restrictions are due to cultural traditions: kosher food in the Jewish religion, halal among Muslims and vegetarianism in most Hindu practices. On the other hand, people refuse certain foods for personal reasons, which can be generalized by the desire to eat more consciously.
As psychologist Yulia Lapina notes, with prolonged fasting, the brain changes its structure. This is why food becomes an object that can give a person a sense of control. In a world of chaos, the psyche needs stability. That’s why food rituals appear: proper nutrition, schedule, calorie counting. “This way you can achieve a magical transformation of the body. Everything is fine. I'm doing everything right. I have everything under control. And at night, you may be haunted by nightmares about losing control: eating forbidden cakes or sausages - and waking up in a cold sweat,” writes Yulia Lapina. This is roughly how eating disorders begin to form.
Very often, when forbidding himself something, a person breaks down and devotes even more time to what he had recently strictly denied himself.
“Usually people with certain personal characteristics set such strict prohibitions for themselves,” says Tatyana Karavaeva, doctor of medical sciences and vice-president of the Russian Psychotherapeutic Association. “They often combine impulsivity, which they find difficult to control, and dichotomous all-or-nothing thinking. And if a person has set a limitation for himself, which he then suddenly violates, then the thought arises: “If I broke my promise a little, it means that nothing worked out for me and you can do whatever you want.” This thinking, which is also called “black and white,” in combination with impulsiveness, leads to breakdowns accompanied by compensatory behavior.”
The line between a regular diet and an eating disorder is very thin. The main criterion by which it can be carried out is the reasonableness and admissibility of the adjustment. If the goal is a very low weight that is dangerous to health, and restrictions deprive the body of essential microelements, then most likely we are talking about a disorder.
Fornication and spiritual life
Fornication is not just a bodily sin, it causes irreparable harm to the human soul. Submission to lustful passion inevitably leads him to spiritual fornication, alienation from God, and licentiousness. Prodigal passion corrupts a person and distorts his way of thinking. Such a person a priori cannot become a strong personality with an inner core. Due to the fact that he cannot or does not want to fight passions, acquiring worldly wisdom.
Promiscuity is not combined with integrity, with faith in God, with love. A person’s perception of the world is carried out through the prism of passions. The opposite sex is perceived as an object of pleasure. The concept of love is replaced by passion. Love is not perceived as service. The heart loses the ability for pure feelings, compassion, mercy, and becomes coarser. Let us recall the Gospel parable of the prodigal son, which clearly reveals the essence of sin. A person harms his body and soul by moving away from God, from true love. But at the same time, this parable is about repentance. A person who has realized the severity of fornication and its destructive consequences has two paths:
– the path of salvation: repent and, like the prodigal son, return to the Heavenly Father;
– the path to death: continue to indulge sin, yourself and your passions.
How exactly does this pain manifest itself?
The Church contrasts chastity with licentiousness and debauchery. “Dissolute”, “wandering” means that a person has lost his way, has turned off the path. These expressions through which we talk about bodily impurity, about the fact that a person has lost the path to God - he has neglected the available ways of dealing with sin. This cannot but affect the internal, mental state of a person.
Firstly, a dissolute person will never become an accomplished strong personality. Being destroyed by his own mistakes, not knowing how to use the will, reason and wisdom, not uniting these scattered pieces of Adam within himself and not even striving for this, being in a situation where the body does not obey the spirit, he cannot find what we call internal the rod.
Secondly, my small experience of observing the lives of many people I know - including from school - shows that most of those who began to lead a dissolute lifestyle early did not know happiness in marriage.
Due to the constant switching from one, as they say now, partner to another, a person’s integrity is destroyed, and he is no longer able to love with all his heart. He constantly compares his current relationships with previous ones and cannot give himself entirely to love alone, because part of his nature remains in past relationships.
We know the words of the Apostle Paul: whoever has sex with a harlot becomes one body with her (1 Cor 6:16). That is, this connection, like a scar, remains with him forever. By doing this, leading a dissolute lifestyle, you fragment your knowledge of God, the world and your loved one into endless fragments.
Thirdly, an unchaste person, not being a whole person himself, and does not perceive his spouse as a whole person, loves not the whole person, but only his bodily component, partly spiritual, there is no question of the spiritual. He only knows how to own and use, even if he arranges it very beautifully and romantically.
Fourthly, such a person is naturally incapable of love as service, because he is aimed exclusively at receiving, possessing and appropriating for himself. This is finite love: as soon as what a person is used to receiving dries up - his spouse has grown old, fallen ill, his previously unnoticed shortcomings have been revealed - his love also dries up, and he looks for a replacement.
That is why it is assumed that a Christian family can be created with only one person. A Christian keeps himself physically pure until marriage for the benefit of his future spouse. The Church believes that everything a man needs to know in a woman is in his wife. And everything a woman needs to know in a man is in her husband.
By violating his chastity, a person destroys the integrity of his soul, which should be gifted and dedicated to his spouse. It is natural for a Christian not to engage in premarital relations - for him it is a loss. The loss of the possibility of the love that he wants to reach.
And love as service can only be grown in marriage, when a person, throughout his entire life together with his beloved, grows to the full disclosure of the personality of his spouse. Moreover, he loves both when he fully receives reciprocal love, and when he stops receiving it - this is not an obstacle to love.
As a priest, I constantly see how an unchaste person, having become a Christian and deciding to change his life, often suffers bitter failures in trying to build a family according to the church model - he is hampered by his past life experience. It is much easier for a person who is chaste before marriage to become happy in family life, because all that part of his soul that was created by God for union with a spouse is given to a single person.
Sleep deprivation
Lack of sleep or no sleep at all can be the result of a disorder or a personal choice. Often in the second case, this is a form of self-test romanticized by the Internet, where deprivation is dubbed “entertainment, self-knowledge or a legal substitute for drugs.” Separate communities are being created on social networks, where people - mostly teenagers - organize sleepless marathons and share their feelings.
“I learned about sleep deprivation several years ago,” says Roman, a participant in one of these publics. — I decided to try it because the topic is interesting. Nevertheless, I myself did not reach the deadlines: I lacked motivation. Maximum, maybe three days, a little more - my personal record. Summarizing my limited experience and what others go through, I can note that on the third or fourth day the perception changes (the perception of sounds, for example, becomes more acute), greater emotional instability and aggressiveness appear, hallucinations and attention disorders occur. Deprivation, it seems to me, contributes to the appearance of visual hallucinations.”
Forced wakefulness has been studied as a method in psychiatry since the 1970s. Some researchers note its effectiveness in treating depression, while others, on the contrary, refute it. In 2021, a group of American scientists analyzed more than 40 years of publications on this topic and compiled their own statistics. Sleep deprivation worked in 45% of cases. Nevertheless, there is a common opinion on the Internet that today the method is also popular in psychotherapy.
Hinduism
Sadhu at the Ghats on the Ganges, Varanasi, 2008
In Hinduism, celibacy is usually associated with sadhus
(“holy people”), ascetics who leave society and renounce all worldly connections.
Celibacy, called brahmacharya
, is the fourth of
the yamas,
and the literally translated word means "dedicated to the Divinity of Life".
brahmacharya
is .
brahmacharya
practice is to keep a person focused on the purpose of life, on that which instills a sense of peace and satisfaction. It is also used to develop occult powers and many supernatural skills called siddhis.
Information diet and refusal of social networks
Compared to all previous practices of restrictions, this is the youngest. But is social media really doing so much harm that it is necessary to strictly control the time spent online?
According to the International Classification of Diseases (ICD) and the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), there is no diagnosis for social media addiction. The real problem can be addictions that a person acquired in real life and transferred online. For example, gambling on the Internet is perceived by the psyche as an ordinary gambling game.
The story is similar with communication. In the offline and online space, a person uses the same behavior patterns. For example, anthropologist Robin Dunbar tried to find out how many social connections a person is able to maintain. For this study, the telephone conversations of the subjects were recorded and statistics were collected as a result.
Dunbar found that a person is able to maintain on average up to 150–230 contacts and distributes attention very selectively. As a rule, everyone has 1–2 closest friends and another 3–5 slightly less close friends.
We periodically communicate with 10–15 people, but not so closely anymore. People may change, but the structure of relationships remains the same.
What types of men divide women into?
Suddenly I came across a study in which girls and men took part. They were asked to choose women to marry based on their outer clothing. One option, where women were dressed in short skirts, with bright makeup, very sexy. The second option, where the women were in long skirts, with calm makeup, and a modest appearance.
Men almost all chose the second option to live in a family. And their girls with the first type of clothing were surprised that they themselves were going to marry these guys, but they did not choose them. It turns out that the men simply did not plan to connect their fate with them.
Why choose chaste and modest people?
It is believed that chastity is the preservation of purity and virginity. But in fact it is a broader concept. A woman’s chastity means purity of thoughts, self-control, especially sexually, modesty, loyalty to herself and her man, and high morality.
And the word “chastity” itself consists of two words - “whole” and “wisdom”, such a core as body and spirit, fused together.
Watching sexual literature and videos often leads girls astray, even if they have not had close relationships with men. Thoughts always influence behavior.
The Milanese Bishop Ambrose of Milan in the 4th century shared the chastity of wives, nuns, girls and widows, they differ from each other by different vows and rules.
Women always, and especially chaste women, strive to harmonize space
She emanates such strength and energy that men involuntarily pay attention to it
Remember men's companies. And if there are women there, then the men behave accordingly: either use profanity, or, conversely, behave with dignity and respect. And it all depends on what kind of woman is in the company. With a chaste woman, it is unlikely that even any man will “swear” or behave in any indecent way.
Principles and tenets of serving your husband
The true nature of a woman is revealed in selfless devotion to her husband. Only if she observes the basic principles of service and follows certain postulates, can she become truly happy and protected from any hardships in life, surrounded by the attention and favor of her husband.
A chaste woman should follow these principles:
- The desire to become your man’s closest friend, with whom he can always share his most intimate things.
- The ability to share his sorrows and problems with her husband, support him in difficult situations and inspire him to take serious actions that correspond to his capabilities.
- Respect and respect for your husband. Thanks to this, he will provide his wife with more opportunities to participate in solving his problems. In this case, the man begins to treat his wife more intimately.
- Self-control in relationships with your husband, even if any misunderstandings arise. Thanks to this, a woman will receive support from a man in all her affairs.
- Constantly wanting the best for your husband and using only pleasant words towards him. Thanks to this principle, the wife will earn great favor on his part; her ears will never be touched by the foul language that comes from the man’s tongue.
The postulates of service are the rules that trigger creative processes in the family. Essentially, these are five pillars, each of which is fundamental, that is, relying on any of them, a woman will receive favor and respect from a man.
The main rules on how to behave chastely:
- Intimate service to your husband, deeply understanding him as a person.
- Kindness, respect for your man, desire to smooth out conflicts.
- Maintaining good relationships with friends and relatives of the husband.
- Sharing with your spouse the vows you have taken on yourself.
- Loyalty.
This video will help you learn more about the principles of serving your husband.
Who is a chaste girl
A girl who has taken the baton of spiritual and physical purity from her parents and intends to pass it on to her children in the future is called chaste. She is waiting for her chosen one, and if there is already one, she shows him the need for reasonable abstinence, which will certainly have a positive impact on their future offspring.
Appearance
Chastity is manifested in the fact that a girl does not try to be flashy and noticeable, does not always strive to look impressive, and does not require others to recognize her importance in any way. She always knows the limits in everything and understands that she has true value in this world, but she never flaunts her knowledge.
A girl does not necessarily have to be shy and closed; on the contrary, she is interested in live communication, and not empty chatter. Her main wealth is always inside, and she is not going to give it away to the unworthy and just anyone.
Walking easily through life, she is always on the alert so as not to overlook her one and only, for whom she is going to open all her spiritual values, the emeralds of a tender, tremulous heart.
Naked truth
In public, Wasserman always appears in full gear.
For a man who refused sexual pleasures and close relationships, Anatoly Wasserman had rather piquant habits. In public, he appeared in full gear: trousers with pockets and the famous unloading vest weighing seven kilograms, stuffed with a bunch of things - from documents to needles and a knife. But at home, where all the necessary tools and gadgets were at hand, the erudite preferred to walk naked.
“By the time guests arrive, I most often only have time to put on my swimming trunks. I go naked when it doesn't bother anyone. Am I a nudist? In general, yes. In Odessa, I visited nudist beaches for many years. I read, work and eat naked too,” Wasserman said in the “Secret to a Million” program on NTV.
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It’s one thing to hear about such features, but quite another to see them with your own eyes. In October, a film crew from the NTV channel’s “Once Upon a Time…” program visited Anatoly Alexandrovich’s apartment on Khodynskoe Field. On his own territory, the erudite greeted guests in underwear and shoes.
But at home, an erudite can meet guests in a negligee
“Even if I put on my underpants, it’s already good”; “A virgin lights up, probably regrets a decision he once made”; “Territory of freedom? I think that this bad upbringing or age-related changes are strange, and maybe just a banal hype. It’s now fashionable for us to undress in public, and anyone who says that this is good PR is mistaken, this is bad PR,” Internet users reasoned after watching the show.
To be fair, in the main part of the issue the hero was dressed in a T-shirt and trousers and in decent appearance showed journalists his home studio, collection of books, calendars and weapons. Why then was the first meeting with program staff held in negligee?
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Firstly, there was no time to get ready, since the erudite had a lot of work to do: three books were awaiting editing, and a couple of articles were due for delivery. Secondly, he always pores over his work without clothes due to a technical problem in the apartment. “There is always a lot of different electronic equipment connected near my workplace,” Anatoly Alexandrovich later explained. “That’s why the temperature there is quite high.” And if I turn on the air conditioner at such a power that I am comfortable, then the rest of the apartment will be very cold. And I have guests at home quite often, and this will be quite disturbing for them. That's why I'm usually dressed in a "well-worn Adam suit" at my workplace. And if someone rings the doorbell, then most often I only have enough time to put on my swimming trunks. And only then, when you meet guests, you put on something more serious.”
However, after seeing the video with himself naked, Wasserman was not at all upset. “It is clear that my “slim” body is not a sight for the faint of heart, but this is no longer my problem. If someone doesn’t like it, it’s a pity, of course, but I don’t bear responsibility for that,” the intellectual concluded.
