Hello, dear reader! Today we will talk about how you can forgive your husband’s betrayal. The topic is very sensitive and hot, so it is important to understand a certain theoretical approach to this. What will be in the article:
- Why men cheat;
- Is it necessary to forgive my husband’s infidelity - Psychologist’s opinion;
- How to forgive your husband's betrayal and save your family;
- How to forgive your husband's betrayal and move on;
- Should I forgive my husband's betrayal? Advice from a psychologist;
- Ways to protect relationships from cheating.
When faced with betrayal, many women begin to experience such a vivid range of feelings that they are often forced to seek psychological help. In this article we will try to find out what happens in a couple during betrayal, what are the signs of its occurrence, and whether it is worth forgiving your husband’s betrayal. We’ll also try to understand what to do if betrayal occurs in the family, but it’s impossible to separate. Is it possible to forgive betrayal in a marriage, is it worth doing?
Let's figure out how to forgive your husband for cheating
Reasons pushing husbands to cheat
According to statistics, in the modern world, more than 78% of men have cheated on their wives at least once. Of course, these are average data, but it is still worth considering them carefully. And most importantly, try to understand the reasons for betrayal. Of course, in each case they are individual, but still the general trend is worth considering. And pay close attention to your partner’s behavior and take into account his reactions. Due to inattention to each other, a moment often comes when a woman is faced with the situation of how to forgive betrayal. This is a painful condition that requires deep psychological study, primarily from a woman who has decided to try to save the family. A woman has to solve the problem of how to forgive her husband’s betrayal and continue to live with or without him.
So, the reasons for husbands’ cheating:
- Boredom in the union;
- Sexual disharmony (dissatisfaction);
- Revenge, rebellion;
- Neurotic state;
- There is no serious understanding of marriage, etc.
Many painful changes in personal life begin with disharmony within a couple. A great feeling does not protect against betrayal.
Let's figure out why men cheat
Sexual dissatisfaction
How to forgive the betrayal of a loved one or husband is a difficult question and it takes a long time for a woman to answer. The first thing a wife begins to think about if her partner has betrayed her is her unattractiveness sexually. Harmony in intimate life is fundamental. We are not talking about external beauty (and gorgeous ladies are cheated on), but about the fact that specifically two people in a couple are attracted to each other in an intimate way. We were able to satisfy our needs in bed. Lack of sexual satisfaction is one of the common motives for looking for a new partner. The question of whether it is worth forgiving the betrayal of a boyfriend or husband if there is no sexual harmony is a delicate one. Often with this problem it is worth coming to a psychologist or sexologist. Sex life, if you want to restore the union, needs to be reconsidered. And it takes two people to do it.
Sexual connection is important for relationships
Incompatibility of life guidelines
Spouses' different views on life do not contribute to strengthening the union. With all due respect to each other, different interests dictate different lifestyles, hobbies, and pastimes. And, if there is a person nearby who shares the husband’s hobbies, then the poor wife can only sympathize. And wish to find the strength to forgive your husband after betrayal.
It is important that you and your husband do not disagree on all points and topics.
Need for self-affirmation
Wounded pride and the need to assert oneself are a common motive for cheating on one’s wife, especially if she has an overly authoritarian character. Yes, it happens, a man does not feel like the head of the family because the woman is too strong in character. In some cases, the husband experiences humiliation and psychological pressure from his domineering wife. And looking for a new lady to meet with is just an attempt to assert himself, to show that he is a man and does as he sees fit. Whether to forgive your husband's infidelity is a difficult task. It requires working with a psychologist. If he asserts himself, this indicates that there are mistakes in the couple in the correct distribution of roles and mutual respect. And they require a solution.
By the way, we recently published an article about what kind of girls men like. Be sure to read it - it will be useful!
Sometimes a man needs self-affirmation that a woman cannot give
Boredom and monotony in relationships
The usual rhythm of family life, stereotypical behavior, monotony - all this negatively affects the marriage union. A husband in such a situation often begins to look for a hobby on the side in order to feel newness and move away from the usual family scenario. Even living in love, in this case, it becomes painful to decide whether it is possible to forgive betrayal committed out of boredom. Rather, here we are not talking about forgiveness, but about the search for novelty. You can’t forgive betrayal if you don’t work through the problem and change both. Moving away from the usual patterned behavior, changing the environment, traveling together more often - psychologists recommend all this to couples in order not to run into a reef in family life called “BOREDOM.”
Is it possible to forgive betrayal if everyone remains to their own opinion and nothing changes in joint communication? No, such a solution will not give long-term results.
That same boredom kills relationships from the inside
Understand why a person is offended
When someone allows himself to violate his values in a relationship with such a person, he perceives this very painfully - he is offended, and perceives it as a betrayal.
Betrayed - at the mental level - it was taken away or not given. Loyalty and devotion were taken away. They lacked respect and honor.
The psyche of such people is “focused” on the past. It was their nature that rewarded them with the honorable duty of remembering and passing on the experience of generations. But, unfortunately, negative emotions over time act like yeast on dough - over the years, the unseemly actions of others become increasingly surrounded by negative assessments. The offender himself becomes, in their minds, an increasingly dishonest person. They cannot forgive betrayal.
People who live in grievances often choose the path of loneliness - they do not strive to build new relationships with people. For them, any changes and innovations are stressful. New things scare them, so if a friend, then for life, if a wife, then the only one.
If your friends and wife betray you, there is a high probability that you will no longer want another relationship. Having once received a negative experience in life, such people subsequently spread the negative attitude of their first experience to everything else. All women - … ! All mans - … ! Why make friends - everyone will betray you someday anyway!
Then they can get a dog. A dog is your best friend, a dog will not betray you.
Is it necessary to forgive my husband’s infidelity - Psychologist’s opinion
How to forgive your husband after cheating, and whether it’s worth doing is a serious topic to understand. A psychologist's advice on forgiving betrayal can be a help for a woman. She will have to figure out a difficult situation - not only forgive, but also honestly answer questions about her feelings for her husband, whether she can treat him without hostility, without remembering such a difficult fact for her. Is it worth forgiving the husband’s betrayal if suspicions, fears, and mistrust now live in his wife’s head? Sometimes, in order to deal with this, you have to devote more than one month to working with a consultant, to understand your true feelings for your spouse and the opportunity to start living with him in a new way.
Is it necessary to forgive my husband’s infidelity - Psychologist’s opinion
Understand what it means to forgive betrayal
Understanding how to forgive betrayal means knowing yourself and understanding others.
Learning to free yourself from resentment means knowing yourself, knowing your psyche, realizing your desires, life values and priorities. Learn to understand the causes of resentment. What is realized disappears. It's like the sun rises at dawn - a ray illuminates the sky and the darkness of the night disappears.
As soon as a person realizes that no one is planning betrayal, no one wants to offend him, that it is he himself who is offended, and when he begins to understand that offense and betrayal are simply his personal perception of reality, the offenses are released.
People with developed and realized qualities of the anal vector experience the opposite feeling of resentment - they experience a feeling of deep gratitude. This takes their quality of life to another level and fills their lives with joy in interacting with other people.
System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan turns grievances into gratitude and reveals the essence of the question of how to learn to forgive.
Numerous results of people who learned to free themselves from feelings of resentment and were able to forgive betrayal confirm this.
You can begin your path to liberation from the burden of grievances and betrayal, to a new happy life already at the free online training on system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan. Don't hold grudges - register here and now.
Author Galina Kuzmenko
The article was written using materials from Yuri Burlan’s online training “System-vector psychology”
How to forgive your husband’s betrayal and save your family - Advice from a psychologist
It is difficult to forgive betrayal, even in a couple where it was quite expected (there was a crisis, there were serious scandals, etc.) The fact is that the question of how to forgive betrayal is mostly designed for a woman’s understanding of the situation. And the weaker sex, according to psychologists, often begins to behave erroneously after the betrayal of her husband. It’s stupid to pretend that nothing happened, and most importantly, it’s absolutely wrong. But many women begin to behave this way, putting on a mask of indifference to the situation, hiding true emotions. Emotions in this case can help restore trust in a couple.
How to survive your husband's betrayal - advice from a psychologist
In a couple where there were strong feelings, it is so difficult to forgive betrayal that many women, having received this sad experience, turn to specialists for help. At this moment, more than ever, competent advice from a psychologist is needed on whether it is worth forgiving your husband’s infidelity.
Answers should be given based on the woman's condition. Sometimes it takes a long time to get rid of difficult emotions before you can come to the right decision.
How to forgive your husband’s betrayal and save your family - Advice from a psychologist
Revenge is a dish served cold
Betrayal gives rise to a storm of emotions. The victim experiences humiliation and feels betrayed. The only thought spinning in my head is revenge! Revenge in this case is perceived as a way to prove to a partner that he is not the only one free to act as he pleases. Of course, the first thing that comes to mind is retaliatory betrayal. But it should be noted right away that this idea will not bring anything good. The feeling of guilt will only worsen, to which will be added the awareness of oneself as a traitor.
READ Signs and most common reasons for a wife’s infidelity
Revenge pushes you onto the path of self-destruction, deals a blow to pride, self-esteem, and at least for some moment brings satisfaction.
What a wife should not do after her husband cheated - Advice from a psychologist
Each lady has her own character, as does her reaction to the betrayal of a loved one. Some fall into hysterics, destroying everything in their path, while other ladies, on the contrary, isolate themselves from the whole world, experiencing severe depression. It is often difficult to figure out how to forgive the betrayal of a loved one if a woman has instability in her reactions at a difficult moment. You cannot try to forgive betrayal if there is no stable assessment of your future together. It is impossible to talk about reconciliation while there are open issues in personal communication between partners.
What a wife should not do after her husband cheated - Advice from a psychologist
How to forgive your husband’s betrayal and move on - Advice from a psychologist
Psychologists often hear the question of how to forgive a husband after cheating if there is resentment. The state that the lady experiences at this difficult moment cannot be called positive. The specialist’s task is to change painful reactions from trauma, to try to direct the woman’s thoughts towards her future life, new strengths, and resources.
Psychologists recommend viewing what happened as just the tip of the iceberg. And look for the main problem in trust, emotions within the couple, mutual understanding. Is it worth forgiving a guy’s betrayal if all this is not in the union? The answer is more than obvious. And we need to start solving this topic with mutual understanding, establishing personal contact in a couple.
How to forgive your husband’s betrayal and move on - Advice from a psychologist
Understand why the other one is offending
Our psyche is our desires. A person can do something only if he wants to do it. Desires control our lives. And there is nothing stronger than them. People cannot control their desires, since the psyche is incommensurably larger than consciousness. And the smaller cannot control the larger.
If a person’s desires are not fulfilled, he experiences frustrations—painful conditions. If desires are not fulfilled for a long time, then a person may experience such tension that, in order to satisfy his desire, he can violate all the restrictions of society - both the rules of cultural behavior and the law.
Such is the power of human desires given to a person at birth to preserve himself and all people. It is important to learn to realize that each person expresses only his innate desires and none of the eight vectors contains the property of offending another or committing betrayal.
People do not offend - they realize themselves in accordance with their innate properties and life values, which may not coincide with the values of others. And the development of a chain of events that leads to the emergence of grievances and the feeling that “anyone can betray” is based only on ignorance of the psyche - both one’s own and other people.
Ways to protect your relationship from cheating
It is impossible to give a guarantee that there will be no betrayal from your husband. But every woman can minimize the risk of betrayal. So:
- It is worth paying attention to your partner’s habits and hobbies. As practice shows, common interests bring us very close together.
- Sex and more sex. You should not turn this part of life with your loved one into a habit. And what measures you take for this is up to you.
- The danger of being around all the time. Therefore, we pay attention to each other’s personal space in order to get a little bored.
- We keep ourselves in shape – physical and psychological. We are constantly developing.
- Fewer scandals - more constructive conversations.
If you want to avoid unnecessary conflicts with your husband, then read this article! She will help you with your problems.
We tell you how to protect yourself from your husband’s cheating
Should you forgive your husband's infidelity - Advice from a psychologist
If we had not forgiven each other for our infidelities, then the likelihood of reunions and second chances in marriages would have been almost zero. But before you decide to take such a step, it is worthwhile to thoroughly understand the motives for such forgiveness. If they are associated with an attempt to be correct, good for your children, to save a marriage, and not to upset your parents, then in this case reuniting with your loved one is not the most correct option. Until I undergo therapy with a psychologist and form a CLEAR personal understanding that I want to forgive and continue to be with my husband.
If you suddenly realized that your husband is an abuser, then this article will be especially for your case!
Should you forgive your husband's infidelity - Advice from a psychologist
