Anger and irritation in Orthodoxy

Orthodox Life

During Great Lent, every Christian must wage an intensified struggle against passions. The holy fathers also say that during this period temptations intensify, as a result of which a person falls into the sin of irritability. We have collected teachings from Athonite monks on how to deal with irritability.

“Some monks are not peaceful, and give reasons: either bad obedience, or bad potassium, or an old man with a difficult character. But they do not understand that it is not potassium’s fault, nor obedience, nor the old man’s fault, but the sick soul. A proud soul does not like anything, but a humble soul will be fine. If your boss is bad, then pray for him, and you will have peace in your soul. If your potassium is bad, or you don’t like obedience, or your illness is burdensome, then think to yourself: “The Lord sees me and knows my situation; therefore, it pleases God this way,” and you will be at peace. If the soul does not surrender to the will of God, it will not be peaceful anywhere, even if it carries out Lent and prays. Whoever blames people for reproaching him does not know that his soul is sick, and it is not the reproach that is to blame.” (Reverend Silouan of Athos).

Once the Monk Silouan of Athos was asked how a person who had an irritable boss at work should behave. To this he replied: “An irritable person himself suffers great suffering from an evil spirit. He suffers this torment for his pride. The subordinate, whoever he is, must know this and pray for his boss, who is sick in soul, and then the Lord, seeing his patience, will give him (the subordinate) forgiveness of sins and constant prayer. It is a great thing before God to pray for those who offend and insult us; for this the Lord will give grace, and you will know the Lord by the Holy Spirit, and then you will joyfully endure all sorrows for Him, and the Lord will give you love for the whole world, and you will fervently wish the best for everyone and you will pray for everyone as for your own soul . The Lord commanded to love enemies, and whoever loves enemies becomes like the Lord, but loving enemies is possible only by the grace of the Holy Spirit, and therefore, as soon as someone offends you, pray to God for him and then you will maintain peace in your soul and the grace of God. And if you grumble and scold your boss, then you yourself will become irritable, like him, and then the word of the prophet David will be fulfilled on you: you will be chosen with the chosen and corrupt with the obstinate (Ps. 17:27).” (Reverend Silouan of Athos).

The Monk Nikodim Svyatogorets told such an instructive story that will help get rid of irritability due to holding a leadership position: “We had such a case. The monastic steward sent one worker on business, but he, due to inexperience, did not want to go. The housekeeper tells him: “Go.” Then the worker got angry and, in front of all the people who were there, and there were about forty people, he called the housekeeper a dog. But the housekeeper took pity on the worker, and gave him tea and sugar, and said: “You always call me dog.” And suddenly the worker felt so ashamed that his face burned with shame, and after that he was more obedient than everyone else. It's so good to live out of love; then the Lord helps with His grace and gives fervent prayer for people. But if the housekeeper is irritable, he will spoil his own soul and outrage other people with his anger.” (Reverend Nicodemus the Holy Mountain).

“Suppose someone insulted you with something, big or small, and you began to feel movements of displeasure and irritation with the suggestion to retaliate. Pay attention to yourself and hasten to realize that these movements want to captivate you for bad reasons... Try to arouse and affirm feelings and dispositions in yourself. This is what will happen—to expel passion from the heart and replace it with its opposite virtue, which is the goal of invisible warfare.” (Reverend Nicodemus the Holy Mountain).

“A person is enslaved to passions, giving the devil rights over himself. Throw all your passions in the devil's face. This is what God wants, and this is in your own interests. That is, turn anger, stubbornness, and similar passions against the enemy. Or, better said, sell your passions to the tangalashka (this is the nickname the elder gave to the devil), and with the proceeds, buy cobblestones and throw them at the devil so that he doesn’t even come close to you. Usually we, people, through inattention or proud thoughts, ourselves allow the enemy to do us harm. Tangalashka can use only one thought or word.” (Reverend Paisiy Svyatogorets).

“In earlier times, life was more peaceful and people were patient. And today everyone you take is like a lighter: they throw sparks and cannot bear a single word. ...But it is also true that today some types of activities not only do not help to achieve peace of mind, but can also make a naturally calm person nervous.” (Reverend Paisiy Svyatogorets).

“A small child gets angry, knocks his legs and shouts “I don’t want to, I won’t!” But with age, he must get rid of this, preserve only childish simplicity, spontaneity, and not his childish nonsense. You see, some people go to such lengths! They bang their heads against the wall in anger - it’s good that God arranged it this way, that people have strong heads, so nothing happens to them!” (Reverend Paisiy Svyatogorets).

“Often, due to external reasons, a person experiences dissatisfaction and breaks down because he does not feel satisfaction from what he is doing and wants something else. But such irritation as external dust disappears when a person finds what he is striving for.” (Reverend Paisiy Svyatogorets).

“If you get angry, you should see if you have the passion of anger. It’s one thing if a person in irritation says a harsh word because he is tired, something hurts, he has some problems, etc. Another may respond to a greeting: “Leave me alone!” - although they didn’t say anything bad to him, they just said “hello.” But the person is tired, he is in pain, that’s why he reacts this way. After all, even the most patient donkey, if overloaded, will kick.” (Reverend Paisiy Svyatogorets).

“Now even the flies are getting irritated! They have stubbornness and persistence! Previously, if you shooed away a fly, it would fly away. Now he sits stubbornly... But it is also true that today some types of activities not only do not help to achieve peace of mind, but can also make a naturally calm person nervous.” (Reverend Paisiy Svyatogorets).

Source

Impeccable Passions

The Holy Fathers have a teaching about impeccable passions. All sinful passions have their own non-sinful cause, as they existed before the Fall. For example, the passion of gluttony is based on human nutrition. About the passion of anger, the venerable Abba says that before man sinned, the Lord, foreseeing our fall into sin, put into us virtue, or an impeccable passion, which is called anger and which helps a person fight sin. Anger helps a person in his impeccable state to move towards the goal of adoration. When Satan seduced Eve, he put doubts in her heart: did God really speak? And Eve did not drive Satan away from her with anger and contempt, but accepted doubts from him and thereby sinned. But if she had used the anger given to her by the Lord, then the Fall would not have taken place. The Gospel repeatedly shows how the Lord was angry and lamented over the sins of some people, about their wickedness, about their vile deeds. And this anger is not sinful, but rather impeccable, it is embedded in nature so that it fights sin.

Holy Scripture warns us in every possible way against the influence of this passion

“Do not be hasty in your spirit to become angry, for anger dwells in the hearts of fools” (Eccl. 7:9).

“Therefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to become angry, for the anger of man does not bring about the righteousness of God” (James 1:19-20), the Apostle James, the brother of the Lord, commands Christians.

Counting unrighteous anger among the sinful deeds of the flesh (Gal. 5:20), the Apostle Paul gives the same commandment to the faithful:

“Let all bitterness and rage and anger and shouting and slander, along with all malice, be put away from you; But be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you” (Eph. 4:31-32).

“And now put aside everything: anger, rage, malice, slander, filthiness of your lips; Do not speak lies to one another, having put off the old man with its deeds and put on the new man, who is being renewed in knowledge after the image of Him who created him” (Col. 3:8-10).

Useful materials

This is one of the seven deadly sins

According to the definition of St. John Climacus:

The Lord Himself said in the Sermon on the Mount that anger is a mortal sin:

“You have heard what was said to the ancients: do not kill; whoever kills will be subject to judgment. But I tell you that everyone who is angry with his brother without cause will be subject to judgment; whoever says to his brother: “raqa” is subject to the Sanhedrin; and whoever says, “You fool,” is subject to fiery hell. So, if you bring your gift to the altar and there you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go first and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Make peace with your opponent quickly, while you are still on the way with him, lest your opponent hand you over to the judge, and the judge hand you over to the servant, and they throw you into prison; Truly I say to you, you will not come out of there until you have paid the last coin” (Matthew 5: 21-26).

If an angry person is subject to such a severe judgment of God, to the point that he can be sentenced to eternal torment in hell fire, then this clearly testifies that anger is a mortal sin!

What the Holy Fathers Say

“Do not speak with irritation, but let your words be with wisdom and understanding, as well as your silence... (St. Anthony the Great).
Irritation is the rapture of the soul; it takes the soul out of the mind just like wine (St. Basil the Great).
The mind is also characterized by anger, which is not alien to nature; Without anger, a person cannot have purity, that is, if he is not angry at everything that is in us from the enemy... This anger has turned into such a state in us that we are inflamed with it at our neighbors for some insignificant and useless things (St. Abba Isaiah).
...If you are able to use a chaste mind to cut at the bitter root of irritability, then you will destroy many passions at their very beginning (St. Basil the Great).
It is better to stop irritation with a smile than to rage indomitably (St. Ephraim the Syrian).
Four things increase anger in us: when we strive to satisfy wishes, when we follow our own will, when we arrogate to ourselves the right of teaching, and when we consider ourselves wise (St. Abba Isaiah).
If you need to (reprove) your brother, and you see yourself in anger and disorder, then do not say anything to him, so as not to become more upset (St. Abba Isaiah).
An irritable and noisy person is generous with oaths, but a silent person is reasonable (St. Ephraim the Syrian).
Like the poison of asps, so is irritability and memory; because they change the face, and disturb the thought, and relax the veins, and produce in a person a lack of strength to do things, and meekness and love put all this aside (St. Ephraim the Syrian).
Anger is an unsafe advisor for anyone; what is done in anger is never prudent (St. Gregory the Theologian).
When, for some reason, the irritable part of our soul becomes alarmed, then the demons offer us hermitage as a good thing, so that, having eliminated the causes of grief, we will not be freed from confusion... (Abba Evagrius).
Just as the stomach cannot accept healthy and solid food when it is weak, so an arrogant and irritable soul, becoming powerless and weakened, cannot accept spiritual words (St. John Chrysostom).
...It is common for cowardly, cruel and grief-stricken people to become irritated over minor incidents... (St. John Chrysostom).
...Being irritated, we will not be able to say or hear anything sensible; Having freed ourselves from passion, we ourselves will never utter an offensive word, and we will not hear offense in the words of others (St. John Chrysostom).
Many laugh at you as a vindictive person who resorts to a bad defense, to irritability, which the Creator gave to help the soul, to reinforce bodily strength during times of laziness and relaxation. Therefore, if those who ridicule you speak the truth, then it is clear that you do not know the purpose of the Creator, using iron for murder, beauty for seduction, tongue for blasphemy, and making the Giver of good things the author of evil. Therefore, quickly curb your irritability, so that it does not plunge you headlong into destruction (St. Isidore Pelusiot).
Irritation and anger, it seems to me, are almost the same thing; but the former indicates the rapid movement of passion, which steals the ability to think, and the latter indicates a long-term stay in passion. Why is the first called so from the word ignition, and the second from the word to ferment and desire revenge (St. Isidore Pelusiot).
If someone... annoys you, or somehow saddens you, then, according to the word of the fathers, pray for him, as for him who has shown you great benefit and for healing your voluptuousness. Through this, your irritability will decrease; for, according to the holy fathers, love is the bridle of irritability (St. Abba Dorotheos).
Nothing is more disgusting to repentants than embarrassment from irritability, because repentance requires great humility, and irritability is a sign of great exaltation (St. John Climacus).
The passions of irritation are: anger, bitterness, quarrelsomeness, irascibility, insolence, arrogance, arrogance and others like that (St. Gregory of Sinaite).
You will easily succeed in freedom from anger and meekness if you turn everything away from yourself and move your soul towards love, remain silent more, eat in moderation, and always pray, as the fathers said: “bridle the irritable part of the soul with love, wither the desirable part of the soul with abstinence, inspire the rational part with prayer; and the light of your mind will never be darkened in you” (Patr. Callistus and John Ignatius).
Irritability must be fought. The first step is not to give in... to grit your teeth and move away... (St. Theophan, the Recluse of Vyshensky).

How to deal with angry thoughts and words

From the last advice of Saint Theophan we can see the first means for combating anger. After all, this passion nests in our heart (cf. Matt. 15: 19), and it is the first to flare up under its influence. Having flared up, it says to the tongue: “Come on, start scolding, swearing, using foul language, showing your anger.”