Is it possible to get married in a church while pregnant or not?
For each ritual, the canons of the church prescribe their own procedure, and especially if it concerns the consolidation of a marriage. Ideally, a couple should register their marriage at the registry office and then get married, and then have children. But how does the church view it if a pregnant woman acts as a bride?
Catholic church
The Catholic wedding ceremony in its preparation for the ceremony lasts at least 3 months and with the obligatory condition that the couple is officially registered in the registry office. As for pregnancy, the Catholic faith does not consider this an obstacle to refusing to hold a wedding ceremony.
Greek Catholic
The Greek Catholic Church is more democratic in its canons and also says that the wedding of a pregnant woman is allowed in the temple.
The only difference from the Orthodox wedding ceremony is that the whole procedure consists of 3 rituals, namely the betrothal, preparation for the ceremony and the ritual itself. Regarding the ban on getting married to a pregnant woman, there is no such thing, the main thing is that the couple is officially registered as husband and wife.
Orthodox
The Orthodox Church also allows the wedding of a pregnant woman, the only condition is the presence of a marriage registration certificate at the registry office. After all, if a person, man or woman, cannot legally take responsibility for another, then what kind of marriage, spiritual and personal responsibility can we talk about?
What is a wedding
Wedding (the sacrament of marriage) is one of the seven sacraments of the Orthodox Church, in which the marriage union is blessed and sanctified by God. The ceremony is performed by a priest from the white clergy (not a monk). A wedding is a small service consisting of special prayers. The clergy asks the Lord for help in creating, maintaining, and increasing marriage.
Like any church sacrament, a wedding presupposes the spouses’ faith in God, prayer for each other, and life according to Christian commandments. Family is joint work, mutual sacrifice. If spouses do not want to work on their marriage, then the Lord will not help them.
A wedding is not a magical act, as a result of which the husband and wife will not need to do anything, and prosperity will fall on their heads.
Marriage was established by God himself back in paradise at the creation of Adam and Eve.
It is no coincidence that in the New Testament the first miracle - the transformation of water into wine - was performed by Christ at the wedding feast in Cana of Galilee. Thus He noted the importance of the family path for a person. The Lord calls men to selflessly love their wives, and wives to obey their husbands. In a union, spouses are obliged to maintain mutual love and respect, fidelity and devotion.
A sad statistic today is the divorce of married couples. Unfortunately, many people do not treat the sacrament responsibly, but approach it following fashion. If necessary, the church allows a second wedding for the innocent party, but the reading of prayers is less solemn, with penitential texts, since the dissolution of a married marriage is a great sin.
Is it possible for a pregnant woman to get married in a church?
The Lord determined for a person the sequence of actions when concluding a marriage. First, the couple communicates and gets to know each other. With mutual understanding, like-mindedness, and common faith, people submit an application to the registry office, register, then get married and only after that give birth to children. This is ideal. It is clear that this happens very rarely. If a couple initially lives according to Christian principles, then the question of marrying a pregnant woman cannot arise.
The Church does not prohibit pregnant women from getting married
There is a lot going on in life, and not everyone grows up and is brought up in the church from birth. The Orthodox faith is beautiful because, despite two thousand years of foundations, dogmas, canons, regulations, it descends to human weaknesses. Love for a person is always placed above any law.
At the moment, there are no canonical obstacles to a pregnant woman getting married. But common sense should always be present. It is necessary to take into account the gestation period and the woman’s well-being. The sacrament lasts about an hour, during which you are required to stand. Before that, it is advisable to take communion together at the Divine Liturgy, which lasts 2–3 hours. The total is 3–4 hours.
If a woman suffers from toxicosis, pain in the head, legs, back or other ailments, then it is better to postpone the wedding until a more favorable moment.
The opinion of the clergy
Letters with questions about pregnant women often come: is it possible to be baptized, to be a godmother, to confess, take communion, get married? There are no canonical restrictions for pregnant women. As for the sacrament, I would like to advise you to start it as often as possible. This is necessary for the health of the soul and body of both the woman herself and the child she is carrying.
Hieromonk Job (Gumerov)
https://www.pravoslavie.ru/7027.html
Women sometimes ask the question: “Is it possible to get married during pregnancy?” If before pregnancy you did not ask for God’s blessing for the conception and birth of children, then it is, of course, better to do this earlier than later. It is better to get married during pregnancy than after.
Priest Kirill Ivanov
https://www.pravoslavie.ru/86905.html
But if both spouses believe, then, of course, they can and should get married, no matter what month of pregnancy the wife is at that time. After all, a wedding is not a magical ceremony, but a teaching of God’s blessing to the husband and wife on their married life. If Christians have entered into a legal marriage, then the Church blesses it, and there is and cannot be anything bad in God’s blessing.
Those who told you that getting married while pregnant is a big sin simply do not understand the essence of the matter. This fornication is a great sin, and pregnancy is the Divine mystery of the birth of a new life, and in the sacrament of wedding, God's deep blessing is poured out on the family.
Archpriest Konstantin OSTROVSKY
https://www.pravmir.ru/grex-li-venchatsya-beremennoj/
When should you not get married in a church?
Since there are no restrictions for pregnant women to participate in the sacraments, other than a reasonable approach, all that remains for the couple is to come to the temple to talk with the priest and set the time for the wedding. Forced participation in the sacrament is not allowed. For example, one spouse insists, the other agrees under pressure, either due to pressure from parents, following fashion, or because of the beauty of the ceremony, etc. Both must get married by free will - the priest asks about this before the sacrament begins. You need to know that the church does not hold the ceremony on all days of the year.
The Orthodox Church does not perform weddings on all established fasts, on Christmastide, on the eve of great holidays and fasting days on Wednesday and Friday. You can find out the appropriate day in the wedding calendar or find out in the temple itself.
It is forbidden to get married during fasting and church holidays.
Only people baptized into the Orthodox faith can begin the sacrament. The church also does not marry:
- representatives of other religions;
- atheists;
- minors under civil law;
- unbaptized and not intending to be baptized;
- people who are related spiritually and by blood;
- people in an unresolved marriage;
- mentally ill.
In special cases, the ruling bishop may bless the marriage of an Orthodox person with a non-Orthodox person, provided that the children are baptized and raised in the Orthodox faith.
Is it possible to get married without registering a marriage at the registry office?
The concept of “civil marriage” in the church and in the world is significantly different. The Russian Orthodox Church (ROC) recognizes a marriage registered in the registry office, even without a wedding. A union in which people live together without a stamp in their passport is called “prodigal cohabitation” by the church. To participate in the sacrament of wedding, it is necessary to legally formalize the marriage. Almost all temples require a marriage certificate from the couple.
Before the wedding, it is necessary to register the marriage at the registry office.
Until 1917, marriage in the church had legal force. The wedding was preceded by a betrothal ceremony, the selection of witnesses, and the collection of information about the newlyweds and their families. After the revolution, everything changed dramatically. Now the church is separated from the state, but allows only couples registered in the registry office to get married.
Rules for the wedding of a pregnant woman
Before proceeding with the sacrament of wedding, it is important to properly prepare for it. Preparation consists not only of choosing a dress - it is important to follow a number of rules:
- Observe a three-day fast during which the future spouses limit themselves to certain foods, words and thoughts, family life, and life together.
- During this time, the couple reads certain prayers, and in front of the territory the priest conducts a conversation with the young people, giving his instructions about the norms and laws of faith.
- Before the wedding, the couple confesses and receives communion, thereby preparing for a new family life.
For the wedding ceremony, you should prepare the following in advance:
- Sacred icons, always in pairs - most of them are the faces of the Savior and the Mother of God. They can be purchased by both newlyweds themselves and their parents.
- Wedding rings are also purchased in advance as a symbol of the couple’s faith and fidelity.
- Wedding candles, preferably large ones, as well as stands for them or special scarves in which they are wrapped to protect against dripping wax.
- Pure white, or with special patterns, a towel.
An important aspect during a wedding is the preparation of clothes - after all, the bride, like the groom, should be adorned with modesty. For the bride, the dress should be modest, as closed as possible, especially if a pregnant woman is getting married, preferably a loose cut that will not restrict her movements. Don’t forget about comfortable shoes - the wedding itself takes about 40-60 minutes and it can be difficult to endure the entire ceremony.
A veil is also an important attribute, but if a woman considers it inappropriate due to her position, she can easily replace it with a white scarf.
Why you can't get married while pregnant
The wedding ceremony is not performed if one of the spouses does not want it. The Church does not approve of it being carried out under the coercion of parents, the other half, or because it is fashionable. A man and a woman must agree to the wedding by voluntary consent. To ensure free expression of will, the church minister conducts a conversation before the ceremony.
Weddings on any desired date are not permitted. There are days prohibited for this kind of rituals. These include:
- any posts;
- days preceding major holidays;
- Christmastide;
- Wednesday and Friday.
They also do not get married in the following situations:
- those who profess a different faith;
- people who have not registered their marriage in the registry office;
- atheists;
- relatives;
- people under the age of majority;
- people who are officially married to another person;
- unbaptized;
- people who marry more than three times;
- people with mental illnesses.
There are exceptions to these rules. Thus, the church allows the ceremony to be held without official registration if it is scheduled for the day after the wedding. It is also allowed to marry an Orthodox Christian with a representative of another faith, provided that children born in this future are baptized and raised according to the canons of Christianity.
Features of the ritual
A woman carrying a child under her heart is pure before God, even if the conception occurred before marriage. After all, God blessed her with a new life, and therefore there are no obstacles to her wedding.
The main thing is faith in God and the desire to receive the blessing of the church for marriage, but not a tribute to fashion.
But the couple should take into account the existing restrictions on weddings, which in no way relate to the fact that the bride is pregnant. So the priest will not marry a couple if:
- If a couple marries 3 or more times, in this case the wedding is not permissible.
- If both spouses are baptized Christians, otherwise the priest will refuse the wedding.
- A wedding is also impossible between blood relatives of the 4th generation.
- It is forbidden to get married if the newlyweds are not registered as husband and wife with the registry office. The only conclusion from this rule is that marriage takes place in the registry office on the day after the wedding, but for this you need to have an extract from a government agency.
Is it possible for a pregnant woman to get married in the Orthodox Church?
Church ministers explain the meaning of the wedding ceremony. Its essence is to obtain blessings for future spouses from God. The family life of any couple should begin with this ritual. But first, a man and a woman must be sure of their desire to unite themselves in church marriage. The Orthodox Church has an extremely negative attitude towards divorce and does not encourage re-weddings. That is, a church marriage should be one for life.
In the Orthodox Church, spouses are married only by mutual consent. A child born into such a family is considered given with God's blessing. According to the old canons of Orthodoxy, intimate relations before a church wedding were considered prohibited. After all, it was this ritual that, until 1917, personified the official conclusion of marriage. Now these rules have changed. The Church recognizes as official a marriage concluded in the registry office. In this regard, modern clergy do not refuse to marry married couples even if the woman is pregnant.
Important
Pregnancy in itself is not considered sinful, according to the Orthodox Church. This is evidence of the great miracle of the birth of a new life.
Signs and beliefs
The early remnants of paganism still make themselves felt in a variety of superstitions.
If a ring falls or a church wedding candle goes out, this promises unhappiness in family life, divorce, and even the death of one of the spouses. There is also a belief that the head of the house will be the spouse who first steps foot on the wedding towel. Also, many couples believe that they should not get married in May - they say the couple will suffer all their lives. But all these are rather prejudices and superstitions, because a strong and friendly family, married in a church, observing all the foundations and canons of Orthodoxy, will never suffer from any prejudices.
Summing up and giving an answer to the question posed, is it possible for a pregnant woman to get married, the church gives an unequivocally positive answer, and even strongly recommends that parents get married before the birth of the baby.
Features of preparation for a wedding and important moments of the sacrament of wedding
For such an important sacrament as a wedding, it is necessary to prepare in advance for the ceremony to be a blessing. And here it is important not only to purchase suitable clothes for visiting the temple, but also to put your spiritual state in order.
The day of the sacrament is preliminarily agreed upon with the priest, since the ceremony is not performed on the main Orthodox holidays, these include Easter, Ascension, Christmas and others.
What to prepare for the ceremony
To carry out the wedding ritual, you need to prepare several important things:
- Two icons, one of the Most Holy Theotokos, and the second of Christ the Savior. If the husband and wife are from believing families where the traditions of Orthodoxy are honored, such images are passed down from generation to generation and presented as gifts to daughters and sons before the wedding ceremony. Such icons are considered a talisman for the family and contribute to procreation. If there are no images in the house, they can be purchased at any church store and pre-consecrated.
- Newlyweds usually purchase wedding rings before registering their marriage at the registry office; they can also be taken with them to the wedding ceremony. In some cases, spouses purchase another set of paired rings, especially for the ceremony. It doesn’t matter what metal they are made of, it is just a symbol of family ties; If you don’t have money for gold rings, you can buy silver ones.
- Buy or embroider two towels yourself, which will be thrown over the icons.
- Another towel is purchased so that the newlyweds can stand on it after the wedding ceremony. By the way, there is a popular belief that whichever of the newlyweds is the first to stand on such a rug will make all the important decisions in the house.
- Purchase 4 snow-white handkerchiefs. Two will be needed for witnesses who will hold the crowns over the heads of the spouses. The newlyweds themselves need two more to hold their wedding candles. By the way, they are purchased at the church shop immediately before the start of the sacrament.
- Both spouses should wear crosses, preferably those with which they were baptized in church.
Witnesses must be present at the wedding ceremony. They hold crowns over their spouses and take responsibility for the spiritual support of the newlyweds in family life. It is advisable that they be older than those being married and be baptized.
What to wear and wear for the bride and groom
If a girl is pregnant, the choice of outfit should be approached carefully; it should not cause discomfort and not violate the canons of the church. In this regard, it is easier for the groom - they buy a formal suit in dark shades and classic shoes.
Even when carrying a child, a girl wants to be beautiful on this important and solemn day. Contrary to rumors and assumptions, according to the rules, pregnant brides are not prohibited from wearing a white dress. The main thing is that it does not have deep cutouts, décolleté, or translucent fragments. The appropriate length is just below the knees or to the floor. More often than not, pregnant women choose the first option, since this model is more comfortable with a large belly.
The head of the girl getting married should be covered; a modest veil without unnecessary accessories should be selected so that it does not interfere during the ceremony. You can use a beautiful scarf, the main thing is that it is white. The choice of shoes for the bride is also taken responsibly, given that a pregnant woman will have to spend about an hour on her feet. Therefore, buy comfortable shoes made of genuine leather with small wide heels. Since women's feet swell when carrying a child, it is better to take shoes a size larger than usual.
How does a wedding happen during pregnancy?
The duration of the wedding sacrament varies from 40 minutes to an hour, all this time the spouses stand. A few days before the ceremony, it is necessary to fast and confess. The first stage is excluded for pregnant women, as this can harm the baby.
After the newlyweds have entered the temple, the priest tells them to exchange rings and gives crowns to the witnesses, which they hold over the heads of the couple. The newlyweds hold lit candles in their hands. After this, the priest leads the couple around the lectern three times, reading texts from the Holy Scriptures.
How does the church feel about the wedding of pregnant women?
If Orthodox Christians get married, their desire to seal their marriage with a wedding is quite natural. So, those getting married want their offspring to have God's blessing . But what can you do, is it possible to get married while pregnant if the bride is expecting a child before the wedding? Or did you find out about an interesting situation shortly before the sacrament?
There are many opinions on this matter. One of them boils down to the fact that sex before marriage is debauchery, and that is why a pregnant woman is prohibited from getting married. Others are sure that it is easy to receive a church blessing at any stage of pregnancy.
There is an opinion that a baby should come into this world from married parents. But lovers entering family life should not take into account the point of view of ordinary people, but should consult a temple minister on this matter. The clergy explain to parishioners that a wedding is the spiritual sanctification of the family life of the young. And the church has the right to bless the newlyweds.
According to church canons, family life begins with the sacrament of wedding. Thus, the newlyweds are blessed by God for a happy life together and vow not to separate under any circumstances.
Pregnancy and visiting the house of God
There are different opinions about whether pregnant women should go to church. Many arguments do not stand up to any criticism, especially from the Church. Orthodoxy does not recognize any superstitions and will accept them. The Church supports only faith in God. At the same time, belief in superstitions is considered a sin.
Previously, many explained the ban on pregnant women attending church by saying that they tried to protect her from prying eyes. At this time, the only reason why pregnant women cannot go to church can only be the presence of bleeding after childbirth or 40 days after a miscarriage. It should stop after 40 days. Next, a certain rite of introduction into the temple will be performed for the woman.
Other contraindications to visiting church include:
- the reluctance of the pregnant woman herself to visit the temple;
- the physical condition of the pregnant woman, sometimes it happens that the woman is prescribed bed rest and it is difficult for her to stay in church for a long time;
- toxicosis or individual intolerance to odors.
Another unpleasant sensation is that staying on your feet for a long time can cause swelling. In this case, you should sit down and relax. Also, a confined space and large crowds of people can cause headaches and dizziness. That is why it is worth taking water and antispasmodics with you. Remember that the main task during this period is the baby’s health.
Pregnant women can come to the house of God only to light a candle, confess, receive communion, or receive a blessing. It is not necessary for them to advocate for services.
Often in church you can hear a certain word that refers to a pregnant woman. What do they call a pregnant woman in church? This word is “not idle.” It means that the woman is in a state opposite to celebration. She has always been treated with a certain care and caution, because she carries and protects a new life.
Church, pregnancy and marriage
Believers treat pregnant women with special care and reverence, since a new life is born in a woman’s womb. In addition, church ministers consider the mother a holy woman, since she decided to bear the fetus and take care of it. Such a woman is to some extent equated with the Holy Virgin Mary, she is respected and treated with special respect.
It is worth immediately noting that not a single temple employee will approve of civil marriage; priests and holy people only maintain relationships that are established not only in the registry office, but also within the walls of the temple. If the newlyweds have already become legal spouses, then the sacrament of the wedding of a pregnant woman and her husband will be no different from the wedding of a simple married couple.
Not every pregnant woman has a legal spouse. And by church standards, the wedding of people living in a civil marriage is considered a sin. But, despite this, churches do not refuse people to hold weddings. It is believed that since a woman is carrying a child, her soul is pure and all sins are written off from her.
The Lord blesses a couple who are expecting a child. In general, in order to carry and give birth to a healthy baby, you need to attend church as often as possible. You will have to make your trips more frequent before the sacrament itself, and it is recommended to go to church with your future spouse. It is worth noting that the temple does not bless relationships in which one of the partners has married more than four times.
Why perform a wedding sacrament?
Many couples who got married in the registry office believe that going to the altar is not at all necessary. Especially if the family is already waiting for the baby. But the fact is that time passes, views on the worldview change, and people receive more and more traditions from the West. There, relationships are formalized after conception or after the birth of a baby.
If the future spouses are believers, they decide to get married. If the sacrament is performed in a family where one of the newlyweds is not an adherent of Orthodox rites, then the second spouse prays for his health and success. By spiritual standards, this family is complete and deserves God’s blessing.
To the question whether it is possible to get married while pregnant, the answer is unequivocal - it is possible. But if the spouses believed in God while married and decided to get married by mutual consent and of their own free will, and not under the pressure of modern society, then pregnancy cannot be an obstacle to this intention. After all, Christian families are created in order to be support and support for each other and to continue their family line.
Common sense
The Church does not prohibit a pregnant woman from getting married, but in the decision-making process one should rely on common sense and take into account some of the features of this sacrament.
- The sacrament takes about an hour, during which the expectant mother will have to stand on her feet. In these conditions, it is necessary to take into account the duration of pregnancy and the woman’s well-being.
- Before entering into a church marriage, spouses must confess and receive communion. The last sacrament is performed after a person’s presence at the evening service and Liturgy, at the end of which communion occurs. It may be difficult for a pregnant woman to attend a 2-3 hour service.
- Despite the fact that during the sacrament of wedding the spouses receive the blessing of the Lord, it is not a guarantee of harmonious relationships or the health of the unborn child. Therefore, spouses must be spiritually prepared for this step.
A wedding during pregnancy should be a common decision of spouses expecting a child. When making this decision, they should be guided by the recommendations of clergy and personal confessors, as well as the woman’s well-being.
Sources:
https://budumamoi.com/poleznoe/voprosy-very/mozhno-li-beremennoy-venchatsya.html https://ikona-i-molitva.info/mozhno-li-xodit-v-cerkov-beremennym/ https:/ /molitva-info.ru/duhovnaya-zhizn/mozhno-li-venchatsya-beremennoj.html
Wedding after the registry office
The ideal option is to visit the temple immediately after the registry office, that is, after marriage, this will be done according to church traditions. In other words, two procedures - registration and wedding - must be carried out by spouses on the same day.
Those Christians who truly believe in God believe that having children with an unmarried couple is a real sin. That is, if for some reason you did not get married before conceiving a child, you need to do it now.
It is worth noting that pregnancy is not a contraindication for getting married, as many people think.
- If you believe the Bible, then it is worth getting married if only so that the birth goes smoothly, and after this process both the mother and the child recover quickly. According to biblical legends, a married woman in labor will be pure before giving birth.
- After the wedding, a woman's pregnancy becomes blessed by God, which means that parents and their child are bound by sacred bonds.
- If a pregnant woman believes in God, then until childbirth and even after it, she should go to the temple. And a week or two before giving birth, it is advisable to receive the blessing of the priest.
You should not visit the temple immediately after the birth of a child; this can only be done after the baby is 40 days old. It is believed that before this period the woman still has discharge. If after 40 days they have not stopped, it is forbidden to enter the threshold of the temple.
It is worth noting that not all couples get married on the day they register their relationship. But this is not a problem, since you can appear before God several months and even years after marriage in the registry office.
