Do we need to beg off suicides? What should the relatives of the deceased do?

Suicides are not buried according to the Orthodox rite, they are not buried, they are not remembered, they are not prayed for. These are well-known truths for the Christian believer.

But when trouble happens to loved ones, it’s hard for us to believe that we are unable to do anything for our loved one.

On the Internet you can find a lot of discussions about whether it is possible to remember suicides, what prayers are still allowed to be used if a person hanged himself or otherwise lost his life.

Let's talk about all these recommendations and the Orthodox Church's view of them.

A suicide commits an unforgivable sin, but exceptions are possible

To be a Christian means to live like a Christian. Any sinner, if he repented in time, can receive the Lord's forgiveness. But this does not apply to suicides.

They voluntarily give up their lives, that is, they commit a sin. But they no longer have the opportunity to repent. Therefore, suicide is called the most terrible sin.

In other words, the suicide by his act removes himself from the bosom of the Orthodox Church, and can no longer return there.

However, not everything is so simple.

God looks not at the deed, but into the soul.

Therefore, not every suicide can be considered a sinner.

For example, the martyr Pelageya of Tarsus voluntarily entered the oven in order to prevent herself from being executed by the executioners. Now the church reveres her as a saint.

Martyr Pelageya of Tarisia - a suicide, but not a sinner

Suicides can have different reasons. One gives up his life out of despair, another commits a heroic deed, and the third does not know what he is doing, for he suffers from mental illness.

Paisiy Svyatogorets once told the inconsolable father of a suicide victim that since his son jumped from the fifth floor, it means he had enough time to repent. A dying prayer can work a miracle.

Not all suicides are sinners: the reason for the act plays an important role.

God sees and knows everything. Therefore, it cannot be said that all suicides will not be forgiven and will go to hell. Some cases should be considered separately - this is done by bishops, but not by ordinary priests.

Therefore, without permission, it is impossible to perform funeral services or commemorate even suicides who died as a result of mental illness.

Is it possible to pray for the souls of suicides and heretics? Archbishop Nikon Rozhdestvensky

Orthodoxy and modernity

Is it possible to pray for the souls of suicides and heretics?

(From the diary)

We are going through an amazing time! Questions are raised that were already resolved a thousand years ago; values ​​that have been valued for centuries are revalued; decisions that have taken place since the first centuries of Christianity are being revised. And what is especially dangerous: they either forget, or even outright do not want to find out how and on what grounds these issues were resolved by Christian antiquity, and sometimes by the Church itself, the leader of Orthodox Christian thought in those distant times.

It turns out that our generation considers itself smarter, more talented and more abundantly blessed with gifts than the great men, bearers of the Christian spirit, who lived in centuries distant from us. If such conceit is conscious, then it is criminal, it testifies to a departure from the Church, although it is still in thought, but I would like to think that all this is happening more unconsciously, as a sin of ignorance, as a consequence of insufficient education in the spirit of churchliness...

In recent years, unbelief in various forms has spread like a muddy, poisonous wave across our native Rus', and above all, unbelief in the Church as a living organism of love, headed by Christ the Savior as Love incarnate. And this lack of faith in the Church sometimes manifests itself even in those who consider themselves believers in God. For such people, it makes no difference how the Orthodox Church teaches about this or that subject of faith and life: they believe that they have the right to have their own judgment about everything, without inquiring about what St. Church. And modern life raises many such questions at every step. Here is an example of this: due to the decline of faith in general and the embitterment of both morals and characters, the number of suicides has increased. Young men kill themselves, 90-year-olds kill themselves. The soul is emptied, the last remnants of faith and idealism are stolen from the heart, the last traces of the image of God are erased, the spirit freezes, there is no support left for the fight against temptation, and the person decides: there is no point in living and suffering anymore, and is embittered at everything, like a rebel , voluntarily dies. This is the psychology of most suicides. It is based on disbelief in the providence of God, blasphemy against the goodness of God, despair - mortal sins, mortal because they do not give room for repentance, kill the spirit, remove them; They drive away God's saving grace from man. Man voluntarily and completely surrenders himself to the power of the enemy of the human race, the enemy of God, blocks all paths for grace within himself: how will the influence of this grace be possible for him? When it comes to salvation, we must always remember that God does not save us by force: He could create us without us, but He does not want to save us without us and, without violating His truth, therefore He cannot. It is necessary that a person, upon leaving this life, should have at least the beginnings of the will for salvation, so that at least he does not deny the possibility of his salvation, and therefore does not lose hope: we pray for those who rest in the hope of resurrection and eternal life, in whom there remains at least a spark of hope for the Redeemer of the world. Then the Church also prays “for those kept in hell,” according to the words of Basil the Great. The general law of salvation is expressed in the words of the Lord: “in what I find, in that I will judge.”

What I said about suicides, the same can be said about heretics excommunicated from the Church, who were not reconciled with the Church, who died in enmity with her, in excommunication from her. Outside the Church there is no path to unity with Christ, and therefore there is no salvation. Only living members of the Church are saved, living her life, in unity with her through the sacraments, especially the most holy sacrament of communion of the Body and Blood of Christ the Savior, as He Himself said: unless you have suffered the flesh of the Son of Man, nor have you drunk His blood, you have not life in you . And this greatest sacrament exists only in the Church. And regarding heretics, it must be said that if they died without reconciliation with the Church, if they carried in their soul enmity towards her there, into another world, then it is impossible for them to turn this enmity into love, because in general it is no longer possible for a soul in the afterlife change of mood: what direction the soul received in this life, in this way it continues to live in the afterlife. It is no longer the full man who lives there, but only his soul, and what prevailed in the soul in this life continues to possess it in the future. Change for souls who have departed from this world to another is possible only through the prayers of the Church, but on the condition that the soul departed in peace with the Church, if in the will of the deceased there were the beginnings of a sincere desire for salvation, if he was, although weak, but not completely a dead member of the body of the Church who has not fallen away from the whole.

These are the general grounds for judging whether it is possible to pray for the souls of suicides and heretics. But regarding suicides, Saint Timothy, Bishop of Alexandria, in response to the question: “If anyone, being beside himself, raises his hands against himself or throws himself down from a height, should there be an offering (liturgy) for him or not?” - answers: “The clergyman must judge about this, whether he was truly out of his mind and did this. For often those close to someone who has suffered from himself, desiring to achieve it, so that there will be an offering and prayer for him, lie untruthfully and say that he was beside himself. It may be that he did this out of human resentment, or on some other occasion out of cowardice: and it is not appropriate for such an offering to be made, for he is a suicide. Therefore, a clergyman must certainly test with all diligence, lest he fall under condemnation.” This is the only exception that allows church prayer for suicides! A man committed a terrible crime in a state of insanity. It is clear that one cannot judge him harshly for this.

God, in the inscrutable ways of His providence, allowed such misfortune, such violence on the part of the enemy of the human race in relation to a person devoid of reason! Let God be his only Judge... The Church, bowing in humility before the incomprehensible destinies of God, betrays this man into the hands of God's mercy, as deprived of the opportunity to fight the violence of the devil. However, I repeat: in each individual case, the question of whether church commemoration of a suicide can be allowed must be decided by church authorities, which take responsibility before God for permitting or prohibiting such commemoration. And this represents a heavy burden for every bishop. Suicides have recently become extremely frequent, especially among young people. It is impossible to rely on the decision of doctors, who often do not believe in God: after all, such doctors are not at all obliged to enter into a judgment on the merits from a spiritual point of view about whether the suicide was in a state of acute insanity and out of mind at the time of the crime; Their concern is to at least somewhat reassure the living, grieving relatives of the deceased, and so they usually attribute all suicides to acute insanity.

And in a remote corner remote from the diocesan city, this issue has to be resolved by the local priest, who sometimes does not have the courage to refuse a Christian burial and commemoration of a suicide in view of possible complaints to the bishop for refusing this from the relatives of the deceased. Indeed, in our time, the laity completely forget the church rule about subordinating their intelligence to the authority of their shepherd and spiritual father: they look at him simply as a minister of demands, who is obliged to certainly, without any reasoning, fulfill their demands. They forget the rule known even in the Old Testament: obedience is higher than fasting and prayer, higher than offerings and sacrifices. When they are reminded of church rules, they usually refer to former examples of permission and no longer want to reason... And the conscience of the priest is often violated by the laity, and the priest, contrary to his conscience, in order to avoid complaints and inquiries, fulfills their demand.

You can’t help but think: how far our life has deviated from the path shown to it by the Church! After all, it turns out that the relatives of the suicide seem to be forcibly, contrary to the will of the Lord Himself, Who governs the Church and through the hierarchy shows it the rule of life, they want - may it be allowed to put it this way - to push the unfortunate man into the Kingdom of Heaven!.. And this must be especially said about the funeral services for heretics and blasphemers: here there is direct blasphemy, the transformation of church prayer into some kind of violence against the Church, mockery of its servants... This was the case with Tolstoy, this is what is happening now in relation to another blasphemer - Shevchenko, this is what is constantly happening by unbelievers-intellectuals in relation to various detractors of the Church, its enemies, if only they bore Christian names... But regarding the heretics, St. The Church does not even allow such exceptions as there are in relation to suicides: since a heretic or blasphemer died unreconciled with the Church, died in excommunication from it, the Church cannot allow prayer for him. Heresy is spiritual suicide, and it is useless to care about a dead member, cut off from the whole body of the Church, and it is useless to pray.

There is another side to the question of prayer for heretics and suicides, which is usually overlooked, although it is perhaps more important than all theoretical judgments, which, perhaps, so to speak, at their very core rely on it. This side is, so to speak, mystical. We must remember: what is the Church in its essence? According to the teachings of the great Apostle Paul, it is the living body of Christ the Savior, of which He Himself is the Head, and all believers are members, so to speak, living cells of this great organism, animated by the Spirit of God. Prayer, in the words of the late A.S. Khomyakov, is the blood of the Church, which by its circulation attracts the forces of grace to renew the entire organism. She is also the breath of love that unites all believers with Christ and in Christ. Love moves prayer, puts it into action. Love brings the soul of the one praying into contact with the soul of the one for whom she is praying. But this contact is healing for the latter only when he has not yet died for the body of Christ, when he is still a living cell of this body, that is, he has not lost fellowship with Christ, although he is sick, although he has not been cleansed from sinful impurity, but I left here with faith in the prayers of the Church, with the hope of the resurrection in Christ.

Then the prayer of love, ascending to the Redeemer of the world, carries from Him healing grace to the soul of the deceased, grace poured out by the love of Christ to the one who has not yet lost faith in the redemptive power of the Blood shed for him on the Cross. Such a prayer is pleasing to the Lord, as a sacrifice of love for the deceased, and useful for the one praying, as a life-giving work of his love, as the fulfillment of the Lord’s commandment. Such prayer merges with the prayer of the Church itself, the prayer—I dare say—of the Lord Himself, as the Mediator of the New Testament, as the Head of the Church. United with the sacrament of the Eucharist, it penetrates heaven and opens the doors of God’s mercy to our brothers who have fallen asleep in the faith, and the Blood of the Lord washes away their sins. Having washed away, O Lord, the sins of those remembered here with Your honest blood, with the prayers of Your saints, the Church prays when the particles taken out for the living and the dead are dropped into the Blood of the Lord. Now apply this thought to that unfortunate person who, as a heretic, fell away from the Church, is dead to it as a member, or is cut off from the Church by the invisible judgment of God for the mortal sin of despair, in which he died as a suicide.

Can such a dead member of the Church, already cut off from it, benefit a prayer for him, even if it were the prayer of the entire Church? Of course he can't. And the reason for this is not outside of this unfortunate man, but in himself, in the mood in which he passed on to another life. This is a mood of stubborn resistance to God and the Holy Church. He himself does not want salvation for himself: he does not desire blessing, and will move away from it, as the Scripture says. And a change of mood, as I said above, there, in another world, is impossible if there was no germ of such a change in this life. God does not save by force. This is the first one. Second: the light is unbearable for the eyes of those who are sick. It is unbearable to approach God for a soul that has died in unrepentant sin. Who knows? Perhaps our prayer for a person who died in a state of bitterness will only further disturb and strengthen his hostile feelings towards God... At least with regard to evil spirits, it is known that the Lord would be ready to accept these outcasts, but they themselves they do not want to be embittered by their pride. Therefore, instead of benefiting someone who left here in the unrepentant sin of despair and blasphemy against God, it can bring harm to both him and the one who prays for him.

Harm to such a prayer book is also possible from another side. Prayer is not a simple verbal intercession for another, as sometimes happens between people. No. When we pray for our neighbor, we pray not only with our tongue, not with words, but with our hearts, then we perceive the memory of his soul into our soul, into our heart; Out of love for him, we perceive the sorrows with which he is burdened, and, as if on our own behalf, lifting them up to the Lord, we beg His goodness to have mercy or to send him saving grace. The more heartfelt and sincere such a prayer, the greater the mercy of the Lord it can bring down to the soul of the one for whom we are praying. And the closer this person is to us, the more we have feelings of love for him, the more heartfelt our prayer for him becomes. And if he lived on earth piously and pleasing to God, then, remembering his soul in prayer, coming into close contact, uniting with it, we imperceptibly become partakers of the grace that was inherent in this soul during life on earth, and of those good properties, with which she was decorated.

Therefore, prayer for the departed righteous people is very spiritually beneficial and saving for us ourselves. They do not receive so much benefit from us as we receive spiritual joy and consolation from them. The word of Scripture is fulfilled over them: his prayer will return to his bowels. On the one hand, with one simple memory of a person known to us through a good life, our reverent thought about him is already delighted by the beauty of his spiritual appearance; on the other hand, he sees our love for himself and, of course, does not remain in our debt: he, so to speak, shows God our love and, out of his love for us, brings God his warm, pure prayer for us.

But it’s a completely different matter when you pray for a person who has committed grave mortal sins all his life and has not thought about cleansing them through repentance. Here prayer no longer brings joy, but, on the contrary, imparts burden, embarrassment, and anxiety to the one praying. Yes, that's how it should be. By perceiving the memory of the soul of the deceased, the one praying at the same time becomes, as it were, a companion of his spiritual state, enters the area of ​​his spiritual yearnings, comes into contact with his sins, unrefined by repentance, and takes upon himself a share of his mental suffering. And this languor and suffering of the soul during prayer for a dead sinner, if he has not yet perished through the sin of despair, gives him joy and relief, inclining God’s mercy to him through the prayer of love. But if his soul passed over the world in a mood hostile to the Church, if it rejected the redemptive merits of the Lord Savior of the world, as was the case with the unfortunate Count Tolstoy, then how to pray for such? How can one allow himself to be somewhat touched by that god-fighting mood with which his soul was infected? How can one absorb into one’s soul all those blasphemies and crazy speeches and even thoughts with which his soul was full, perhaps even at the very moment of death?.. Doesn’t this mean exposing one’s soul to the danger of being infected by such a mood? It is not in vain that they say that, for example, suicide is contagious: at the mere name of a suicide, his image appears in the soul, and with this image is drawn the way he ended his life... Like a person looking down from the top of a high cliff or bell tower, from where... then a fleeting thought appears - to throw himself down, and something similar happens when remembering the suicide of a person, especially known to those who remember him and were related to him. I'm talking about impressionable and weak people. But in prayer, as I said, we seem to touch with our soul the soul of the one for whom we pray... What if the prayer for suicide, generally prohibited by the Church, will be displeasing to God?.. If the grace of God withdraws from us for violating the commandment of obedience to the Church ? Because we put our opinion above the teachings and rules of the Church?

Let those who demand that ministers of the Church pray for heretics and suicides think about all this.

Is it possible, they will tell me, to pray for suicides and heretics in home, private, non-church prayer?

I answer: home prayer cannot be in conflict with church prayer, especially since church prayer is incomparably higher than private, home prayer. What is my lonely, sinful, weak prayer in comparison with church prayer?.. In church prayer, my weak and, perhaps, unclean prayer is purified and carried to God on the wings of the prayer of the entire Church, the entire host of believers, the host of all the saints of God. For my many sins, I do not have the boldness to approach the Lord my God, much less the boldness to pray for the one who greatly angered Him with the mortal sin of despair; and how can I dare to do what the Church does not dare to do? For if she had dared, she would not have forbidden such prayer...

This is the general judgment about private, home prayer. But they will tell me: how can one refrain from such a prayer, especially for a person who was associated - not to mention with an obvious heretic who was excommunicated from the Church: a sense of respect for the Church, which he insulted and from which he fell away, will not allow him to pray - but with a suicide by blood ties kinship or was very close to him in the spirit of love, how to resist pouring out your soul before the Heavenly Father? How can you not tell Him the sorrows of your heart?..

But this is a completely different matter. No one can forbid each of us personally to “pour out our souls” in prayer before the Lord, to “tell Him our sorrows”: this is not the same thing as prayerful intercession for the deceased. Wise, spiritually experienced and possessed of the gift of reasoning elders-ascetics satisfactorily give a satisfactory answer to this. Thus, the famous Optina elder Leonid, who died in 1841, gave the following instruction to his student, who turned to him for consolation on the occasion of the news he received about his father’s death, which followed from suicide: “Commit both yourself and the fate of your parent to the will of the Lord, the wise , omnipotent. Do not experience the miracles of the Most High. Striving with humility to strengthen yourself within the limits of moderate sadness. Pray to the all-good Creator, fulfilling the duty of love and filial duties.”

- But how to pray for such? - asked the novice.

- According to the spirit of the virtuous and wise: “Seek, Lord, the lost soul of my father, and, if possible, have mercy! Do not make this prayer a sin for me. But Thy holy will be done!”

This is how the godly elder taught and consoled his disciple, who was in great sorrow and sorrow.

In this instruction and for every Christian who is in a similar position, there is much comfort, reassuring the soul in the tradition of both oneself and the deceased in the will of God, always good and wise... And a faithful, humble son of the Church will not demand more from the Church.

Punish the offender: a strong conspiracy

If you want to punish an offender, a strong conspiracy that does not cause harm to you and mortal danger to the offender is what you need. There are situations when calling to conscience and shaming a fierce enemy is possible only through magic. In this case, light magic will help you by returning all the bad energy to the one who sent it to you.

To take revenge or to ask for health? | Help from Stepanova | Stepanova’s prayer to pacify the offender | Summon white magic to help | The offender cannot live in peace

Siberian healer Stepanova guards justice

You should not think that punishing an offender is a terrible sin . Isn’t it a sin to make various attacks on you, direct insults, humiliation? Don’t think that you will do something terrible if you take the advice of knowledgeable people and healers. In the end, a conspiracy against the offender will strengthen and protect you and your family from his evil and dishonest acts.

A good way to reprimand the dark energy of evil enemies with prayer is Natalia Stepanova owns a whole collection of spell words that will bring back all the bad things said to your spiteful critics.

The Siberian healer and her storehouse of knowledge, supported by God, will help you resolve issues in various everyday situations without harm to yourself:

1. Building relationships.
2. Health promotion.
3. Achieving financial benefits.
4. Punishment of offenders.

Many other conspiracies that help with good help are collected in the collection of the Siberian Assistant in Magical Affairs.

Stepanova's prayer to pacify the offender

The healer’s secret is that she uses conspiracies aimed at turning to the Lord for help, which means they do not cause harm to the physical body or human health. Conspiracies are aimed at emotional shock, knowledge of the soul, inducing feelings of shame, awakening conscience:

Do you want to punish your offender ? Use magic words; white magic, supported by actions, will not keep you waiting. Apologies, acts of benevolence and kindness from the other side will quickly arrive at your doorstep.

READ MORE How to become calm and balanced

So, on the waxing moon, buy the heart of any animal or bird in a butcher shop: beef, pork, chicken - everything will be suitable for carrying out the conspiracy. Boil the meat product in salted water, eat a piece and read the following plot:

“As I tasted the heart, so no trouble would come to me from you. The evil is yours, it will not be mine. Everyone will have their own.

Lord God, do not allow evil to reach my threshold, pacify the servant of God (name), let the offense be returned to him, not with fierce evil, sword and fire, but with threefold divine good. As this goodness shines, so my offender will know shame and guilt.

He will come, he will bow down at my feet three times. Live in health, my offender, enemy. Let it be so"

At the same time, you can light a church candle in a candlestick and visualize (imagine) the image of your offender. As you can see, the words of the conspiracy do not harm, no harm comes from them. This means you can safely use them to pacify your enemies.

Call on white magic to help - punish the offender

There are times when you need to make it clear to a person that he is behaving in an extremely indecent manner. In this case, white magic will help you. If you are interested in how to punish an offender with a conspiracy at a distance, read the information. Go to church and light a candle for the health of the person who offended you.

Sincerely ask the Lord to forgive his soul and his sins. The return of bad energies will come through Divine good. When you come home, fill a glass of running water into a transparent glass and, looking at the surface of the water to the very bottom, imagine the face of the person who offended you.

Once you have concentrated, read the magic words:

“As the water in the rivers stirs, your evil will return to you. I don’t wish anything bad, but only return your insult. There is nothing forbidden or dishonest here, and you, the Servant of God, will learn a lot of interesting things: how to endure undeserved pain and resentment, without giving any signs or signs. May everything that is yours be with you, and what is mine will remain with me. Let it be so. Amen"

After reading, pour the water into the sink and run the running water from the tap. Everything bad will be carried away with the stream. Evil will not come near you.

READ MORE Choose any dream: conspiracy

Strong prayer for the punishment of the offender

The guys working there are smart, they can drive a victim crazy

Girls! I had a wonderful, beautiful relationship, truly trusting. We knew almost everything about each other, we were very comfortable together. He was two years older than me. On my 21st birthday he proposes to me. Wonderful wedding, wonderful honeymoon! At 23 I graduated from university, at 27 I became pregnant and gave birth to a son. My husband couldn't be happier!

But not so long ago everything changed. I’m 30 now, my son is three years old. I’ve been married for almost 10 years, during all these years I put up with my husband, I thought: I’ll improve!” but my husband didn’t even think about changing, he beat me, and more and more each time.

I was terribly jealous. I went to work with bruises on my face. endured his threats, humiliation...

loved him, was devoted to him!! I was ready to do anything for him, forgave everything, but I no longer had the strength to endure! He had gone too far!

A friend, seeing my depressed state, advised me to turn to an old friend of hers, his name was Shamil. She said that a couple of months ago, her boss harassed her, did all sorts of dirty tricks, didn’t let her pass, turned her life into a complete nightmare, she turned to Shamil and he immediately decided this problem. I gave him his phone number +79678574942!

After my appeal to Shamil, it was as if my husband had been replaced! The humiliation, threats and other nasty things on his part are over! Shamil is simply a magician! I recommend girls to everyone, he is a master of his craft! He solves life’s problems with any assholes!

I was finally able to breathe easy and start enjoying life again! So girls, love yourself, don’t let any assholes offend you!