How to get rid of foul language and swearing prayer

Archpriest Dionisy Svechnikov and Natalya Yarasova, psychologist-consultant of the Missionary Department of the Tula Diocese for the “ABC of Faith”

Table of contents

• Why and why do people swear
• Psychological effect of swearing
• Spiritual understanding of swearing
• What should swearers do and how to live with foul language?

According to the latest statistics in Russia, 18% of people surveyed swear every day and another 19% - several times a week. Sociologists note that the use of obscene expressions directly depends on the situation in the country: the more terrible life is, the more people swear. This happens because they are very scared and express their fear in this way.

But swearing can also be the “norm of life” of a person. The formation of swearing as a habit usually begins in adolescence, or even in childhood. But if a small child blindly repeats swear words after his parents, then a teenager asserts himself with the help of swearing. This is due to a feeling of uncertainty in oneself, in one’s future.

There is an opinion in society that swearers do not have enough vocabulary to express their emotions in a decent way. In reality, people of very different levels of erudition and breadth of outlook swear. And although swearing is more common among the poorly educated population, in some social groups they even “speak it”, swearing cannot be explained only by a small vocabulary.

Why and why do people swear

The average Russian swearer is a family man under 45 years old with a higher education and a fairly high level of monthly income. Among women there are 2–3 times fewer swearers. And almost 80% of women over 55 years old categorically do not accept swearing.

Interestingly, men most often swear for protection - from a real threat, from their own fear, or to hide their low self-esteem (that is, many men, like teenagers, swear for self-affirmation).

So why do fairly successful people need such verbal defenses? According to surveys, swearers are usually convinced that swearing is a great way to relieve tension and that swearing reaches “some people” better, so they are better understood. Experts say that the mat performs several functions:

• Helps adapt to stress, relieve tension;
• Helps to identify “one of our own” and establish ourselves in a team role;
• Serves to enhance the emotional and erotic expressiveness of speech and as folklore entertainment;
• Accompanies unsatisfied sexuality;
• It is a means of suppressing rivals.
• At the same time, swearing is a symptom of the degradation of literature and cultural traditions.

From a psychological point of view, the tendency to use swear words is closely related to the level of emotional intelligence. The concept of emotional intelligence is used in practical psychology to denote a set of human skills associated with the ability to recognize and understand emotions - both one’s own and those of others, as well as manage the emotional state, establish and strengthen emotional connections.

Emotional intelligence implies that a person has the following qualities:

• emotional awareness;
• self-esteem;
• the ability to notice and understand the feelings of other people (empathy);
• Social responsibility;
• the ability to communicate constructively and lack of fear of close relationships;
• resistance to stress and realistic assessment of reality;
• flexibility and the ability to restrain and adjust your emotions, thoughts, behavior;
• ability to formulate and solve problems;
• optimism and the ability to feel satisfied with life, etc.

And, in fact, inveterate swearers in most cases have a specific emotional intelligence: they have an insufficient level of empathy, they do not have the habit of putting themselves in the shoes of their interlocutor and sympathizing with people, they often have a negative attitude towards others (even if they present themselves as sociable people) , rarely offer their help, and are dismissive of the feelings of other people - even their wives, children, parents.

Perhaps, reading these words, people prone to foul language will be indignant - they say, nothing of the kind. However, this is the reality - most people do not approve of swearing in general, or at least in public places, but convinced swearers do not care about this, they defend their right to swear anywhere, and do so, regardless of the desires and feelings of others. In most Russian cities, swearing can be heard on the street, in transport, and in shops. The presence of women and children does not stop swearing, and attempts to stop swearing can cause an aggressive reaction.

Psychological effect of swearing

Many swearers are restrained in public places, but in their company they are not shy about using swear words. The statistics are inexorable - people use foul language more often at home, among loved ones. At work, due to bosses, clients or other reasons, those who like to use foul language cannot give themselves free rein, so they “act out” at home. In many families where there is a person who swears, a huge number of problems arise on this basis

Unlike women’s swearing, which is often a way to release tension “into the void,” men’s swearing is often aggressive and directed at other people. Moreover, even if swear words are not addressed, aggression can manifest itself in response to a request from relatives not to swear.

“He’s constantly rude to me”; “swearing and endless rudeness towards me”; “swears with the last words”; “makes me guilty of everything”; “he will swear, but you still remain guilty”; “calls you obscenities, says things you wouldn’t wish on your enemy”; “I will soon hate him”; “I endured it for a long time and was scared by divorce”; “I’m thinking about divorce”; “After the divorce, when I talk about alimony and help with children, she swears at me” - these are just a few examples of women’s complaints about their husbands’ behavior.

Supporters of swear words often use as an argument the research of foreign scientists who supposedly prove the benefits of swear words.

Psychologists Richard Stevens and Ollie Robertson from Keele University (UK) conducted a series of experiments, the results of which were published in the journal Frontiers in Psychology. First, scientists confirmed that swearing can have an analgesic effect in extreme situations. They then tried to determine the mechanisms of this phenomenon, testing known hypotheses that pain relief occurs due to an emotional reaction or due to distraction. At the same time, a comparison was made of reactions to traditional swearing, to invented new curse words and to normal words.

92 volunteers took part in the experiment, with an average age of 27 years. They were asked to plunge water into ice water and shout out obscene words and words consonant with them. When the pain could no longer be tolerated, subjects had to pull their hand out of the cold liquid. At the same time, measurements of cardiac activity and surveys were carried out. It was found that pain threshold and pain tolerance increased only in those who swore. And the newly created curse words, like normal words, had no effect on the pain threshold and pain tolerance. The study found that pain relief occurs not due to distraction, but, most likely, due to emotional arousal. Moreover, the newly created curse words evoked an emotionally expressed, but rather humorous reaction, and this did not affect the perception of pain. Accordingly, it can be assumed that the analgesic effect is associated precisely with the emotional arousal that the use of swear words causes in a person. Swearing in the mind is closely associated with aggressiveness, sexuality and humor; in addition, there is one’s own emotional reaction to the use of taboo words, prohibited in polite society. Since a significant effect of humor on changes in the pain threshold and pain tolerance was not identified, most likely, swearing has an impact on the perception of pain through aggression, sexual arousal and tension from committing the forbidden.

All this is consistent with human physiology: pain relief is caused by the production of endorphin hormones. These hormones are released into the bloodstream under the influence of three types of emotions: anger, laughter, and sexual arousal.

Russian neurologist, neurophysiologist Alexander Budik, in a conversation on Sputnik radio, explained that the body perceives swearing as aggression, which allows one to partially drown out the pain. Obscene (profanity) language activates the central nervous system, since aggression puts the body in a state of stress. Against the backdrop of stress, a person may indeed not notice even very acute pain. Athletes experience a similar condition, continuing to fight even after being injured. “Whether in a normal state a person would experience severe pain, he will not feel it in an excited state,” the doctor explained.

The “humorous” influence of swearing, although it does not block painful feelings, is also obvious - laughter associated with swearing helps relieve tension in extreme situations.

Russian scientist L. Kitaev-Smyk conducted research on the positive and negative influence of swearing during preparation for an interplanetary flight, in the surgical department of the Institute. N.V. Sklifosovsky, in combat conditions in the North Caucasus and in Russian prisons. During his observations, the scientist and his like-minded people became convinced that swearing promotes the production of endorphins in all three emotional ways: swearing is aggressive, swearing jokes are funny, and swearing itself, by definition, is based on crude sexuality. Therefore, the mat blocks stress hormones and can reduce fear and pain. However, Kitaev-Smyk emphasizes that the sexualization of speech can be appropriate only in situations of stress and only in male company, and in everyday life it causes significant harm.

Of course, one cannot be in a state of aggressive stress or sexual arousal frequently or constantly with impunity. This is harmful to the body, as it creates unnecessary stress on the nervous and cardiovascular systems. Constant use of obscenities maintains a more or less pronounced background sexually-tinged aggressiveness in the human psyche, and this can, to a certain extent, deplete the nervous system.

In addition, it was found that swearing, with its erotic connotations, promotes the production of male hormones androgens. In men, excess production of androgens may remain without serious negative consequences, but in the female body, additional production of androgens causes unambiguous harm. Swearing is no less dangerous for children and teenagers. Harsh sexual abuse has a detrimental effect on the development of a child’s fragile psyche.

Swearing is always emotionally charged speech: even with the illusion of “calm” use of swear words, just before their use, at the moment of choosing words, there is an impulse, a short-term emotional experience. When using obscenities, this is an aggressive sexual impulse. And through emotional contagion, swearing has a strong impact on those who are close to the person swearing.

Many people perceive swearing painfully. Some people believe that swearing is a sign of a low level of culture, others are convinced of its mental and spiritual danger. Encountering swear words in such people causes a state of discomfort and anxiety, even if the swearing is not addressed to them. A person “tuned” to purity of speech from swear words may even get sick if he is forced to be present next to a constantly swearing person.

Boris Alekseevich Sosnovsky, Doctor of Psychology, Professor, Head of the Department of Psychology and Pedagogy of the Altai Academy of Economics and Law, spoke well about the impact that swearing has on the psyche of a person: “What is the speech, so is the thinking. And what’s wrong with me swearing? Yes, my psyche is already completely different. Instead of describing something beautiful, I said such and such a mother. And everything closed. There is nothing, I don’t see anything anymore. Not all the nuances. I like how Ilf and Petrov mocked this phenomenon. For example, the image of Ellochka the Ogre. A small vocabulary was enough for her to get around in the world. It's the same with swearing. The restrictions that this vocabulary imposes on the psyche are amazing. These are gigantic losses. There is not only a reduction in speech, but also a reduction in thought and the human psyche. In this regard, mate is not unique. Cool, cool. If only these words clogged the tongue. They clog the psyche. This is a personal loss."

Some studies suggest that swearing activates different parts of the brain than the rest of the vocabulary. According to Richard Stevens, author of the book White Crow: Why It's Good to Be Bad, whose research has already been discussed, the brain processes swearing differently than ordinary speech. The latter is responsible for the cerebral cortex and a number of specific areas in the left hemisphere, while swearing is associated with more “primitive” parts of the brain. “People suffering from aphasia (impaired speech) usually have damage to the left hemisphere of the brain and difficulty speaking. But there are also many reported cases of aphasia in which patients were able to use stereotypical language quite freely - that is, sing songs or curse words,” says Stevens. “Studies of patients with Tourette’s syndrome, in which there is sometimes an impulsive urge to swear, suggest that swearing is associated with deeper parts of the brain - with its subcortical nuclei.”

Russian doctors have long discovered that when a person recovers from a stroke or heart attack, his first words are often obscene. This is such a primitive speech that allows the brain to work according to a simplified scheme, in addition reducing fear and the perception of pain.

Prayer against foul language and swearing

Author | 11/24/2017

Your lips will stop swearing after reading a prayer against obscene language and swearing. When you express yourself unworthily, vital energy drains away.

Many people are used to justifying their speech by talking about a bunch of words.

My dears, swearing turns us into a limited person.

To get rid of foul language, you need to pray to St. Nicholas the Wonderworker.

Go to the Orthodox Church and buy as many candles as you like.

Leave some of them for home prayer.

Place candles at the icon of St. Nicholas the Pleasant.

Heartily crossing yourself, ask him to help you get rid of your worst illness.

Take holy water into a spacious container.

Go back.

After putting things off until later, retire to a locked room.

Light the remaining candles. Place an icon of St. Nicholas the Pleasant and a decanter of holy water nearby.

Proceed to repeated and leisurely reading of a special prayer.

Nicholas the Wonderworker, God's Pleasant. Rudeness escapes from my lips, swearing becomes a thing of the past. I spew out bad words, I use obscene language. Weakness lurked in the soul, the flesh drowned in sins. With your blessing I defend myself, I bid farewell to swearing forever. Grant me power over vice, let this be a lesson. Amen.

Apply the sign of the cross to yourself. Drink holy water.

You blow out the candles. Take their cinders back to the Orthodox Church.

May God help you!

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Spiritual understanding of swearing

The problem of swearing also requires a spiritual assessment. “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34) is stated in the Holy Scriptures. If a person’s heart is overwhelmed by impure passions, then they inevitably spill out. This can manifest itself both in words and in actions. The word is, on the one hand, a simple matter, but at the same time complex. It would seem that it might be easier to say something, chat, rather than carry bags. But the consequences of just one word can be very different. The word can be creative and it can also be destructive. With just one word you can express love, and also with one word you can declare war. The word gives life and the word kills.

Profanity is a destructive word. Here is what the Apostle James says about this: “So the tongue is a small member, but does much. Look, a small fire ignites a lot of substance! And the tongue is fire, the embellishment of untruth; the tongue is in such a position between our members that it defiles the whole body and sets the circle of life on fire, being itself set on fire by Gehenna” (James 3:5-6). An incredibly deep and accurate assessment of how much a word means and can do. This is not surprising, because “by the word of the Lord the heavens were established, and by the breath of His mouth was all their strength” (Ps. 32:6). God created all things with the Word. Man, created in the image and likeness of God, is endowed with the gift of speech and must think about what he says. No wonder the popular wisdom says: “the word is not a sparrow; if it flies out, you won’t catch it.” The Lord Jesus Christ points out the severity of God’s Judgment for foul language: “You have heard what was said to the ancients: “Do not kill, but whoever kills will be subject to judgment.” But I tell you that everyone who is angry with his brother without cause will be subject to judgment; whoever says to his brother: “raqa” is subject to the Sanhedrin; and whoever says, “You fool,” will be subject to fiery hell” (Matthew 5:21–22).

A good word produces good fruit, a bad word produces bad fruit, and foul language can produce nothing but defilement, which defiles, first of all, the one who utters it. It also affects those around you.

Modern researchers attribute the origin of swearing to pagan times. Swearing was part of the spells addressed to pagan deities; swear words were associated with the ritual calling of demons. Its use in everyday life, especially at home, was unacceptable, as it could lead to trouble. Here is what Bishop Barnabas (Belyaev) writes about this vile vice: “Foul language is a vile vice, which in the Holy Scriptures is equated to mortal sin (Eph. 5:4-5). The Russian Land groans because of it, souls are corrupted by it... Nasty, monstrous proposals are in fact “sacred”, “prayerful” formulas addressed to shameful demons. Christian! By using them, who are you serving instead of God! You are not just doing a frivolous thing, not just making a rude joke, but you are casting terrible spells, you are invoking and attracting the most vile demons, at this time you are making an unnatural verbal sacrifice to Satan!.. You are becoming, without knowing and not wanting it, a sorcerer, magician, sorcerer."

Unfortunately, people's tendency to follow their passions is not always pacified by the instructions of the Church. Therefore, in the 15th century in Rus', the need to limit the harmful influence of swearing led to the emergence of the first legislative ban on swear words. It was introduced by Grand Duke Vasily III back in 1480. His son Ivan the Terrible ordered to “click on the auction” so that the Muscovites “would not swear and would not reproach each other with all sorts of obscene and nasty speeches.”

However, people continued to curse. The famous author of stories about his trip with an embassy to Russia, the German Adam Olearius, wrote in the 17th century: “Little children, who still cannot name God, mother, or father, already have obscene words on their lips.” Despite the fact that Olearius’s records are clearly biased and serve the purpose of showing Russia as a country of savage barbarians, there is no doubt that the problem of swearing in our country was acute, as other sources indicate this.

Later laws prescribed more severe punishments for swearing. In 1648, Tsar Alexei Mikhailovich issued a decree so that “they should not sing demonic songs, swear, or use any obscene barking... And if people teach someone to scold with obscenities and all sorts of barking - and those people for being so contrary to the Christian law for the fury of being from Us in the great disgraced and severely punished."

The laws introduced by Peter I allowed prison and physical punishment for “whoever, without coming to his senses from the heart, or having come to his senses, scolds with abusive words,” if he does not repent and does not ask for Christian forgiveness, or does not pay with money if he “cruelly scolded” .

If the abuse was obscene and offensive to the faith, then the punishment was cruel: “whoever reviles the Most Holy Mother of God, the Virgin Mary and the saints with abusive words,” “whoever reviles the name of God... and the service of God, and curses the word of God and the holy sacraments... although this is in drunkenness or a sober mind: then his tongue will be burned with a hot iron, and then his head will be cut off.”

It must be realized that swearing is based, first of all, on the vile and offensive use of the word “mother”. What is dear to a person, which is one of the highest concepts for him, is reduced to cynical, vulgar and derogatory use. A.P. Chekhov wrote: “How much wit, anger and spiritual impurity was spent to come up with these vile words and phrases aimed at insulting and desecrating a person in everything that is sacred, dear and dear to him.”

And since swearing has a ritual origin, it is not directed against some abstract mother, but, first of all, against the One who is most dear to a Christian - the Most Holy Theotokos. It is not surprising that ardent swearers are incapable of active and conscious prayer. You cannot call on the name of God and His Most Pure Mother with the same lips and swear.

Priest Alexander Shumsky describes one interesting experience: “Once I said to one foul-mouthed person: “You can swear for hours without experiencing any difficulty in pronouncing these words. And try to say for at least one minute: “Lord, have mercy!” Two words - just one minute! And he couldn't. He got angry and swore at me after that. This is such a sad experiment. Ask the person to pray for a couple of minutes instead of swearing - at least for a challenge. After all, he won’t say even a short Jesus Prayer. He’ll get even more angry and start fighting.”

But if in colloquial speech swearing can still be associated with a short-term emotional outburst, then the use of swearing in written speech clearly indicates the rooting of passion.

With the widespread spread of printing and the emergence of various magazines and newspapers, the problem of swearing became acute for the written word. Unofficially, back in the 18th century, the use of swear words in printed books, etc. was considered unacceptable. And in the 19th century, a new government body appeared in our country - censorship. In addition to ideological verification of texts, censorship did not allow swear words into print. It was from that time that swearing was also called “obscene language.”

Reading rules

In the Russian tradition, it is not for nothing that all swearers were called blasphemers. By swearing, a person glorifies Satan and blasphemes God. This is a grave sin. The Holy Fathers say that a person who often resorts to foul language does not even dare to venerate the cross and icons until he repents. After all, his mouth uttered words with which demons communicate.

Important! Before you pray to the Lord and his saints for deliverance from your vice associated with warfare, you should take communion and confess.

• You can read prayers both in church and at home. You need to understand that the habit of swearing has been formed in a person for years and you shouldn’t expect instant results. Working on yourself, your soul, always comes to the fore. And it takes time.
• It is necessary to offer words of prayer in front of the icon of the saint, with a lit church candle. All thoughts at this moment should be turned to heaven; you cannot pray or think about something everyday. Every word must be filled with faith in the help of God and his saints.
• You can ask not only for yourself, but also for a loved one.

  
  If a person is prone to sinful passion, one should strongly cry out to God for help

The main thing is that the heart is filled with pure love for this person, then the heavenly patrons will definitely hear the prayer.