The sacrament of wedding in the Orthodox Church unites two loving people with the sacred bonds of marriage, giving them God's blessing to create a strong Christian family. During this ritual, wedding icons are used, to which the baptized bride and groom bow. In love for God and each other, future spouses promise to remain faithful, fulfill the commandments of the Gospel, and raise their children. Thus, in a new family, the first shrines in the iconostasis are wedding icons.
Peculiarities
According to long-standing customs, the attributes for the wedding ceremony on the day of the Holy Sacrament are presented to the newlyweds by parents, blessing their children for marriage and passing on the relics from generation to generation. The bride's parents present the image of the Savior to the groom, and the groom's parents, in turn, present the bride with the image of the Virgin Mary.
During the Sacrament, the priest blesses the groom with the icon of Jesus Christ, and the bride with the image of the Mother of God.
After the ceremony, the married couple of a man and a woman leaves the temple with these shrines in their hands and with new spiritual filling in their souls.
Organizational aspects of the ceremony
It is necessary to agree with the priest on the date and time for which the Orthodox wedding is scheduled. The rules of church life oblige this. Sometimes several couples can get married in a church at the same time; this nuance also needs to be discussed. You should be concerned if several cameramen will be taking photos and videos at the wedding, so that there is no confusion and this does not spoil the entire ceremony.
A week before the wedding, the newlyweds must begin to fast: do not eat meat, do not drink alcohol, do not smoke, and abstain from marital intimacy. Before the wedding, the newlyweds must attend a service, confess and receive communion.
It is also necessary to worry in advance about purchasing icons of the Savior and the Mother of God, which must be consecrated, wedding rings, which must be given to the priest before the ceremony, candles, two white towels and four handkerchiefs
It should be noted that according to church canons, rings should be bought for the groom from gold, for the bride from silver. As a rule, the acquisition of all necessary attributes is entrusted to witnesses
The tradition of using icons in wedding ceremonies also has ancient historical roots. Since ancient times, parents blessed their children using holy icons: a son - Christ the Savior, a daughter - the Mother of God, thus giving guidance on the true path.
It is customary to leave a reward for performing a wedding ceremony; you should also ask the priest about money. If the couple does not have the financial ability to pay the entire amount, you can talk about it. Sometimes the amount is not announced at all, and the priest offers to give alms to the church, in the amount that is possible for the newlyweds.
"Wedding couple"
“Wedding couple” is a wedding icon that will bless the marriage of the young, fill them with faith and hope, and make their union happy. Traditionally, this is the name for a composition of two shrines depicting the Lord Pantocrator and the Blessed Virgin Mary.
It is accepted that the future husband is blessed by the face of Christ the Savior, as an intercessor and protector of his wife and future children. The image of the Almighty will remind the father of the family of his great responsibility to his family and the Almighty. The wife is blessed by the face of the Blessed Virgin Mary as the keeper of the hearth, a faithful wife and the future caring mother of her children.
Icons are, first of all, spiritual figurative personifications of saints. Each image carries a huge sacred meaning.
"The Wedding Couple" reminds young people that their union is sacred, all promises are valid and God is with them every moment. Important! The Mother of God is the protector of the family hearth, and Jesus Christ is the Savior.
In addition, the shrines with which the blessing was carried out in the church symbolize love, a strong marriage and home for the newlyweds.
God's gaze
An icon is one of the elements that helps us to know God and the spiritual world. And also learn sacred history, because, looking at it, we see biblical events in colors on the board. It’s not without reason that they say that an icon is theology and revelation in color. According to Archimandrite Zinon: “An icon is an embodied prayer. It is created in prayer and for the sake of prayer, the driving force of which is love for God, the desire for Him as perfect Beauty.”
There are a lot of Orthodox icons and they can be divided into two main groups - house and temple. Each icon has its time and place. Brownies are very diverse: measured, wedding, family, personal, worthwhile. These are icons that belong to one person or family and are kept in the house. The name temple icons speaks for itself; these icons are found in temples, churches and monasteries.
Which ones are needed?
Often, during one of the seven sacraments of the church - a wedding - the priest blesses the couple with icons depicting the Savior and the Mother of God. The image of Jesus in this case is embodied in the icon of Christ Pantocrator, or less often - the Savior Not Made by Hands. Usually the Kazan Icon of the Mother of God, the Iveron Mother of God or the Vladimir Icon of the Mother of God are presented for the wedding ceremony, although other images of the Mother of God are also allowed.
In demand, but not obligatory at a wedding, is the image of Peter and Fevronia, a married couple who are known for their deeds. In most cases, saints are glorified separately from each other, but the faces of Peter and Fevronia are considered to represent the family - a husband and wife who, as in a fairy tale, lived happily ever after and died on the same day. During their worldly life, they experienced many troubles and difficulties, but were able to withstand them, not be tempted by temptations and enemy misfortunes, maintaining devotion to each other and the Almighty.
For the well-being of family life, prayers are also offered to Blessed Xenia of St. Petersburg, Saint Barbara.
ENGAGEMENT RITE
Let's see how the wedding ceremony takes place in the Orthodox Church today. The first part of the betrothal ceremony takes place in the vestibule of the church. If the church does not have a vestibule or an internal portico, then the betrothal takes place at the entrance to the church, which marks the entrance to family life (for the same reason, in the baptismal rite, prayers to exorcise the devil and confession of faith take place in the vestibule). The bride and groom come forward, accompanied by witnesses on both sides - the groom on the right side, the bride on the left. This is how men and women are usually located in the temple, which is easy to remember by looking at the location of the central icons of Christ and the Mother of God.
The priest performing the wedding blesses the bride and groom, gives them lighted candles and wraps them in incense. Then the betrothal ritual begins, consisting of prayers, litanies and the exchange of rings symbolizing mutual promises of fidelity.
Originally there was a gold ring for the groom and a silver one for the bride, but nowadays a pair of rings made from the same material (sometimes even less valuable) is more commonly used. Before the betrothal ceremony, the rings are consecrated by sprinkling with holy water and remain on the holy throne for some time. If desired, you can bring the rings to the church some time before the wedding and leave them reclining on the holy throne during the service of the Divine Liturgy.
The symbolism of the rings (i.e. a circle that has no end, like the mutual promises of the spouses, endless and unconditional) is explained in the prayers of the ritual, when the rings given in various biblical episodes as a sign of fidelity, trust, responsibility and divine mercy are remembered.
The betrothal formula, which in some cases is read three times, is as follows: “The servant of God (name) is betrothed to the servant of God (name) in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, amen.” Similarly, the formula is repeated for the bride: “The servant of God (name) is betrothed to the servant of God (name) in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, amen.”
The priest places the rings on the ring fingers of the bride and groom's right hands. The right hand (with which a Christian is baptized) is the keeper of the rings in the ancient Christian tradition, as well as in the Hebrew tradition, from which many elements of Orthodox marriage originate. In the practice of the Roman Catholic Church, wedding rings are separated from marriage rings (while in the Orthodox Church there is no such distinction), which in many cases has led to the transfer of rings to the left hand. If the bride and groom, following local customs, want to wear rings on their left hands after the wedding ceremony, then there is no serious problem.
We advise you to study the Miraculous Icon of the Mother of God of Chernigov - Gethsemane
The rings, placed on the hands of the newlyweds, are soon exchanged three times (by the priest or by witnesses, depending on local tradition). The exchange of rings expresses the constant exchange between spouses, who, by complementing each other, enrich each other.
If the betrothal ceremony is followed by a wedding ceremony (today, in the vast majority of cases), the engaged and witnesses go to the center of the church, where a table with wedding crowns is prepared. As the couple approaches, the choir sings verses of Psalm 127, alternating with the refrain “Glory to Thee, our God, glory to Thee.”
Cost and where to buy?
Images of saints are the best Christian wedding gifts for loved ones or relatives. A “wedding couple” can be made to order by a master in one color scheme, with images of guardian angels, faces of other saints or scenes from the Holy Scriptures on the margins of identical wooden planks.
Young people can purchase this attribute on their own in an icon-painting workshop, a church shop, a regular store or an online store.
The cost of such a wedding attribute depends on the size, materials of manufacture and method of execution. The price per pair can range from 12,000 to 60,000 rubles.
How to properly bless the newlyweds before the wedding
Parental blessing before marriage is an integral part of the culture. The ritual protects the young family from many troubles, so the traditions of the ancestors are observed to this day.
Not a single wedding is complete without a blessing from the parents, because their parting words are endowed with special power that can ward off trouble from the young. In the Christian religion, blessings before a wedding are carried out with the help of icons, and experts from the website dailyhoro.ru offer to take a closer look at this interesting tradition.
Icons for the blessing ceremony
The tradition of blessing is unchanged: parents give parting words, holding holy faces in their hands, which they then pass on to the young family so that the Higher Powers protect the sacred union.
The Kazan Icon of the Mother of God is the intercessor and patroness of Orthodox Christians. The miraculous face has more than once protected humanity from adversity, and parents acquire it to pass it on to their children who have decided to legitimize their relationship.
The Kazan icon is valuable because it protects women, helping them bear and give birth to healthy heirs. The sacrament of a wedding is also not complete without the Kazan Icon. The priest meets the couple, holding the face of Our Lady of Kazan, and during the ceremony asks her for happiness for the young, continuation of the family, health, peace and prosperity for the new family.
The icon of the “Savior Almighty” is used to bless the groom, asking the Lord for happiness to the young, protection from any troubles and protection for the union of two hearts. In front of the holy face, the groom reads a prayer-appeal to the Higher Powers, so that they preserve love, give him the strength to cope with all adversities and support him throughout his life.
In the blessing ceremony, both icons are usually used, but it is allowed to use one. Most often, parents buy a folding icon - two icons combined with each other. The newlyweds place the shrines in their home so that they can always be under the protection of the Higher Powers and not experience difficulties in family life.
In former times, icons were kept on towels - towels embroidered by the bride. In the modern world, people do less and less handicraft, so it is allowed to buy ready-made towels. The icons are held in front of the young couple, saying parting words:
“Lord Almighty, hear me. I pray you, cleanse my soul from sins. My children are also in Your power, for whom I also ask for blessings and mercy. Forgive them, Lord, their voluntary and involuntary sins, guide them, O Savior, on the right path, bless them for marriage and look after their children. Protect our children, O Lord, by Your mercy, may they not experience need and grief, hunger and poverty. Grant them, Lord, healthy offspring, and protect newborns from any intrigues and human malice. Bless your son and daughter, in the Eternal name, with Your kingdom. Amen".
Roles of parents during blessing
Usually the blessing occurs two times: before the wedding and after the wedding ceremony or painting in the Wedding Palace
The fuss and excitement of parents before a significant event is understandable, so it is important to determine in advance the order in which the attributes accompanying the blessing are held: icons and loaves. In fact, there is not much difference in who will hold the icons and who will hold the fresh bread, but still the parents of the bride and groom should agree in advance on the order of saying parting words
They may consider the following option:
- the groom's father holds the icon of the “Savior”;
- the mother of the bride holds the icon of the Kazan Mother of God;
- the groom's mother brings a loaf of bread on a towel;
- The groom's dad holds glasses with drinks.
The loaf can be purchased at the store in advance or prepared yourself. During its preparation, mothers usually pray, putting love and care for the young into the treat. Most often, a loaf of bread is presented to the newlyweds after they have officially become husband and wife.
Parental blessings are not memorized prayers, but words coming from a pure heart. To give parting words, parents do not need to write a speech and memorize it. It is enough to sincerely congratulate the couple, wish them good luck and call on the Higher Powers for help so that they do not leave the children unattended and protect them from any adversity. We wish you good luck, do not forget to press the buttons and
Recommendations
There are no special instructions on what exactly an icon should be. They all carry the same power, regardless of their age or decoration. However, if it is difficult to make a choice, or if you have doubts or questions, it is better to contact a clergyman. He will tell you which details you can miss and which ones to take into account when purchasing.
It is important to remember that the images must be consecrated, so you should buy them in advance.
The main guidelines are the following criteria:
- Execution. Designs can be printed, hand drawn or embroidered. It is also not prohibited to use works made of beads, amber, and mosaics. Stick with the option that suits you best. Remember that the faces of saints depicted on icons have the same power, regardless of whether the shrine is antique, framed in silver or gold;
- Style. If the “Wedding Couple” is made in the same style, this is only a plus, but icons with different borders and iconographic writing do not need to be replaced and are acceptable for the ceremony;
- Size. It cannot be said that the larger the shrine, the more wonderful it is. Medium-sized samples (20x30, 30x40, 50x60 cm) are also perfect for the Sacrament of Wedding. Icons that are too large will be difficult to use during the process, as will icons that are too small;
- Quality. Although such a relic is not a decorative item, it must be beautiful and of high quality, because it is passed on from generation to generation. It is worth choosing such shrines that do not fade in the sun, all components are clearly fixed, there are no cracks or tears;
- Price. The cost depends on many factors, but it is not necessary to give the most expensive. Whether a person pays 10 or 100 thousand for an icon, it will equally protect the couple and serve as their faithful helpers in their good deeds.
Advice! Sometimes stores offer discounts on defective items. It is not forbidden to buy attributes of this kind; you just need to take into account the degree of deformation when purchasing.
Miraculous icons
In the words of St. Theophan the Recluse: “Some icons are miraculous because God so desires, and the power here is not in the icons, and not in the people who resort to them, but in God’s mercy.”
“Each Christian (non-Orthodox) church has a different attitude towards icons,” summarizes Father Geogriy. — Orthodox Christians venerate those depicted on icons, turn to them (and not to the icon) in prayer, and believe that the Lord, through the prayers of the saints (our intermediaries before God), will give what we ask for. Icons help us, but we can do without them.
By the grace of God, the Lord gives some icons the properties of miracles. A miracle is an event that goes beyond the physical laws on Earth. And through such icons many miracles are performed (an important point: it is the Lord who performs the miracle, not the icon). There are many examples: healing (up to stage 4 cancer), help with finances, in business and at the level of a person’s entire life.
There are examples when there was assistance at the state level. In the old days, when there were attacks by the Tatars, they brought the Vladimir Icon of the Mother of God, and the enemy, with all their numbers, fled from the battlefield. Also, during the siege of Leningrad, there was a religious procession with the Kazan Icon of the Mother of God, and only miraculously the city survived.
But what is important in this matter is that the miraculous icon itself is not an amulet that you need to touch in order to automatically receive help! We have co-creation with God. From the person himself, what is important is faith, spiritual life, awareness of one’s sins, rethinking one’s life and real efforts to change oneself for the better with God’s help
And then the Lord, where necessary, through whatever He deems necessary, will give help.”
icon icons
Read Segodnya.ua on Google News
Follow us on social networks
Subscribe to our newsletter
After the wedding
After the celebration, people often wonder where to put all the wedding attributes, including icons. As a rule, the shrines with which the man and woman were blessed during the ceremony remain with the newly made spouses.
The images are left in the house where the newlyweds will live, and if the couple moves, they take them along with other things to their new place of residence.
Note ! The face of Jesus is placed on the right side of the face of the Virgin Mary. You can place the candles that were used at the wedding nearby and light them on your anniversary or on other important occasions.
You can place the shrines in the Red Corner, a specially designated home iconostasis in the living room or kitchen-dining room, or hang them over the newlyweds’ bed in the bedroom. The main rule of placement is that it should be convenient to approach the iconostasis to offer prayer. It is not worth hiding icons from guests or putting icons in a box, because this is considered a bad omen, and priests call such an act hateful to God, since they occur from the desire to conceal, hide.
The entire subsequent life of the newlyweds takes place under the auspices of wedding icons. In difficult times, the spouses sincerely pray before the images of the Lord and the Mother of God, asking them for the gift of children, for help, and grace. You should not forget about icons on happy days, so that not only on major holidays you can thank them from the bottom of your heart, thank them for peace, prosperity and joy in the family.
Wedding... in condemnation?
— Is an unmarried marriage considered wrong and sinful?
- No. It is deeply incorrect and dangerous to believe that an unmarried marriage is synonymous with fornication. A legal marriage - that is, not a secret one, announced to society and legally registered in a certain way - is fully recognized by the Church. And this is clearly stated in the Social Concept of the Russian Orthodox Church.
- If an ordinary marriage cannot be considered wrong before God, why is a wedding ceremony also needed?
“The fact is that, without a church blessing, it will not be easy for Christians to build their marital relationships so that they become for them a ladder to the Kingdom of Heaven. More precisely, to build the Kingdom of Heaven in marriage now. And this is why the Sacrament exists.
- What is the mystery? What mysterious is going on?
— The sacrament lies in the fact that Divine grace is called upon to transform the natural relationship between a man and a woman into a spiritual relationship. This desire transforms the natural attraction of the sexes towards each other into a step towards Christ - that's what happens. This is beautifully shown figuratively in the Gospel story about the miracle that Christ performs in Cana of Galilee: turning water into wine at a wedding. Any marriage is destined for such a transformation: the “water” of natural human relationships, by the power and action of the grace of the Holy Spirit, must become “wine” and acquire a completely different quality!
- And what is the blessing?
— A wedding is also a blessing for married life within the Christian community itself. Sexual cohabitation for Christian spouses is conceivable only within the framework of a church blessing by the head of the community - a bishop or priest.
— Can we say that this is an attempt to enlist God’s help on this difficult path?
- Partly yes. In a legal marriage, both halves enter into a new, previously unknown, unknown reality for them. And here God’s special help is required.
But this cannot be approached as a deal: we are your wedding, and you are our guarantee of a “full cup at home.” A wedding is a strengthening and blessing of existing relationships, but not building them from scratch, and especially not the legalization of formal relationships between people who “cannot digest” each other.
I will express my opinion, which may not agree with the opinion of a fairly large number of clergy. But I am firmly opposed to people who are not sufficiently churchgoers approaching the Sacrament of Marriage.
Today they often marry everyone. Such an attitude towards marriage neutralizes the Sacrament and turns it into a “magical crutch” for those people who, in general, do not yet know how to walk. But experience shows that there are no “magic crutches”. If people do not love each other, if they treat each other consumeristly, if, having gotten married, they are not going to change anything in their lives, to become real Christians, then this Sacrament will not save them, but will lead to even greater condemnation. And their marriage is likely to fall apart rather than strengthen.
- Why?
— Because any approach of God is a crisis: it aggravates, brings the existing situation to a certain extreme tension. Divine objects are not to be trifled with: they require proper treatment. And if a person is ready to sacrifice himself, his interests, to break through to Christ, the crisis turns out to be salutary and useful for him. If he is not ready, does not want to change, then this exposure, the aggravation of his true state, only accelerates the possible disintegration of the family.
God cannot be treated with disdain. And the Church is His territory, the place of His special, exclusive presence. Therefore, getting married “just in case”, “what if it works” is not worth it. And the huge number of petitions for the so-called “church divorce”, which exists in all dioceses, is the best evidence of this...
Therefore, if we are talking about people looking into the Church who are not, in fact, Christians, for them the form of legal marriage is quite enough.
What you need to know
You and your significant other must be baptized; it is also not recommended to invite unbaptized people, atheists and people of other faiths to your ceremony as guests; you can celebrate this event with them outside the temple.
When planning the date of a sacred ceremony, be sure to study the special wedding calendar, because there are not so many permitted days. For example, they will refuse you:
- during great Lents;
- on patronal and church holidays;
- on Easter and Maslenitsa;
- before the twelve and great holidays, such as Palm Sunday and Christmas Eve;
- during the period of Holy Week and Christmastide;
- on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday;
- and also at night.
There are also favorable dates that you will also find in the wedding calendar.
Before the ceremony in question, newlyweds must fast for several days, avoid intimacy and fun events, and the day before go to church and confess. Read more about all the rules in our separate article on this topic.
In addition to the marriage contract, for the wedding you will need:
- blessed rings;
- 2 Orthodox icons, one of Christ the Savior, the second of the Mother of God;
- 2 towels or towels;
- 2 large candles and 2 small scarves;
- bottle of Cahors wine.
For the ceremony, the bride must choose an outfit that is modest and appropriate for the church: covering the shoulders, back, stomach and knees, without a deep neckline, rich decor and a long train. Delicate pastel colors are welcome, but bright and black are unacceptable. The head must be covered with a veil, scarf or stole. It is also recommended to give preference to nude makeup, and replace bright lipstick with transparent lip gloss, which does not leave marks, because you will be kissing a crucifix and an icon.
Pants are also prohibited for women at weddings.
