What does the Bible say about divorce and remarriage?

Answer

First of all, whatever our opinion on this issue, we must remember the biblical words recorded in the book of Malachi 2:16: “For I hate divorce,” says the Lord God of Israel.” The Bible testifies that God intended marriage to be a lifelong commitment. “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate” (Matthew 19:6). However, God allows two sinful people to marry and therefore divorce can occur. To protect the rights of those who get divorced, especially women, God established certain laws in the Old Testament (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). Jesus pointed out that these laws were given because of the hardness of men's hearts, not because of the will of God (Matthew 19:8).

The debate about whether the Bible allows divorce and remarriage largely revolves around Jesus' words in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9. The phrase “except for the guilt of adultery” is the only place in Scripture where Divine permission for divorce and remarriage is likely given.

Many researchers believe that this "exemption clause" refers to "adultery" during the "engagement" period. According to Jewish customs, a man and a woman were considered bound by marriage from the moment of betrothal. Immorality during this period could be the only reason for divorce. However, the Greek word translated “adultery” implies any form of sexual immorality, such as fornication, prostitution, etc. Perhaps Jesus is saying that divorce is permitted if the sin is sexual. Sexual relations are an integral part of the marriage bond, where “the two shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:5; Ephesians 5:31). Thus, breaking that bond through extramarital affairs may be a valid reason for divorce. If this is true, then Jesus was talking about remarriage in this text. The phrase “marries another” (Matthew 19:9) emphasizes that divorce and remarriage are possible if this condition is met. Please note - only the innocent party is allowed to remarry. Although not mentioned in the text, permission to divorce and remarry is God's favor to the spouse who suffered in such a situation, and not to the one who committed adultery. There may be cases in which the "guilty party" may also remarry, but this text does not address this.

Some view the verse in 1 Corinthians 7:15 as another "exception" allowing remarriage if the unbelieving party divorces the believing party. However, the context does not say anything about remarriage, only that the believer is not obligated to continue the marriage if the unbelieving party wishes to divorce. Others argue that violence (spousal or child abuse) can also be a reason for divorce, although this is not mentioned in the Bible.

While all of this is absolutely true, we should never misuse God's Word. What is sometimes overlooked in discussions of “exceptional conditions” is the fact that, regardless of the meaning of the term “adultery,” divorce is permitted but not required. Even after committing infidelity, with God's grace a couple can be empowered to forgive and begin to rebuild their family. God forgives us much more, so we should follow His example and forgive even the sin of adultery (Ephesians 4:32). However, in many cases, the husband/wife does not repent and continues their immoral sexual behavior. In such a situation, the text from the Gospel of Matthew 19:9 can be applied.

Many people are too quick to remarry when God may have intended for them to remain single. Sometimes God calls a person to abstain from marriage so that he can give his full attention to God (1 Corinthians 7:32-35). Remarriage after divorce is possible in some circumstances, but it is not an exclusive possibility.

It is distressing that the divorce rate among committed Christians is reaching the divorce rate of the non-Christian world. The Bible is extremely clear that God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16) and that reconciliation and forgiveness should be hallmarks of the Christian life (Luke 11:4; Ephesians 4:32). Again, God certainly understands that divorce can happen even among His children. Those who have gone through divorce and remarriage should remember that God's love for them is unfailing, even if their divorce and/or remarriage does not meet the exceptional condition of Matthew 19:9. Often God even uses the sinful disobedience of Christians to accomplish a good deed.

Cultural Studies Analytics

Author(s) of the article: PAVLOV A.G. Section: HISTORICAL CULTURAL STUDY Key words: Marriage, divorce, remarriage, religious dogmas and traditions, Judaism, Christianity.
Abstract:
The article contains an analysis of how the Bible regulates the problem of family conflicts leading to a breakdown in relations between spouses

Article text:

It is unlikely that anyone will dispute that conflicts in family relationships leading to the breakdown of any relationship or divorce are an undoubted evil. Broken lives, upset psyches, humiliating legal procedures, deformed upbringing of children left with one of the parents - all this is just a small part of the consequences of local family conflicts. The real consequences may be expressed in a global catastrophe of the entire European (post-Christian) civilization.

According to experts, in developed countries of Western Europe and North America, every second marriage now breaks up [8,9]. Moreover, the dynamics of divorces is steadily increasing, even despite the fact that an increasing number of marriages are not registered legally, but exist in the form of concubinage. In Russia, divorce statistics are even less reassuring. In 2009, there were 700 thousand divorces per 1 million marriages [4]. And already in the first quarter of 2010, the divorce rate increased to 80 [3]. In fact, about 40% of divorces occur in the first 4 years, and about 2/3 of the total number in 9 years.

There are many sociological reasons for the increase in divorce rates. These are the emancipation of women, a change in the form of employment when both spouses work, the pressure of economic and social problems, and, of course, very liberal civil legislation that facilitates the divorce process. But, undoubtedly, the most important reason for divorce is a change in the cultural paradigm of Western civilization, and, above all, the weakening of the influence of the religious factor due to the spread of a philosophical movement called pluralism, which does not recognize any ideology as true, correct or dominant. The formation of mass culture, the main characteristic of which is consumption, also has an impact on the area of family and marriage relations, excluding from them any sacredness and, for the most part, retaining only the economic and physiological components.

It is noteworthy that since ancient times, issues of regulating marriage relations fell not only within the competence of civil authorities (since they were related to property rights and population size), but also within the religious sphere. Moreover, the spiritual component of marriage is most clearly manifested in monotheistic Abrahamic religions. The era of early antiquity, characterized by very free morals in matters of sex, knew almost no divorces. Legal marriages ensured the legitimate transfer of inheritance to legitimate children, and in order to diversify the experience, there were concubines, hetaeras and prostitutes. In addition, civil laws provided for the payment of substantial monetary compensation to the wife in the event of a divorce, which also deterred husbands from acting rashly. The great Athenian orator and politician Demosthenes formulated the generally accepted norms of sexual behavior in Ancient Greece: “For pleasure we have courtesans; concubines - for everyday cohabitation; We have wives so that they will bear us legitimate children and be faithful trustees of our household affairs.” Prostitution in pagan culture was not only not condemned, but was part of a religious cult.

The morals of Ancient Rome were initially more restrained than those of Greece. During the first 500 years of the Roman Republic, not a single divorce was recorded. History has preserved the name of the first husband, who divorced his wife in 234 BC due to her infertility. – Spurius Carvilius Rug[7]. But with the advent of the Greeks, Roman morality went downhill sharply. Greece was conquered by the military might of Rome, but socially and morally Rome was conquered by Greece. In the middle of the 1st century AD. Seneca wrote that women marry in order to get divorced, and divorce in order to get married.

The first state of the Ancient World whose religion regulated sexual relations in detail was Israel. The monotheistic religion, which underlies all civil legislation, declared in the name of God and the Creator of all things that sexual relations are permissible only between a man and a woman and only in a legal marriage. Adultery, extramarital sex, and sexual perversion were punishable by death according to the laws of the Torah. But, despite all the severity of the Jewish “family code,” it provided for the possibility of divorce. “If a man takes a wife and becomes her husband, and she does not find favor in his eyes, because he finds something nasty in her, and writes her a bill of divorce, and gives her into her hands, and sends her away from his house, and she will leave his house, go and marry another husband...” (Book of Deuteronomy, chapter 24, v. 1, 2). In order for a man seeking a divorce to understand the significance of the decision being made, the law prohibited him from returning to his former wife if, after divorcing him, she had been married to another man.

Although Judaism believes that “marriages are made in heaven,” they are dissolved, according to Jewish rabbis, in the same place. In the fact that the marriage union breaks up, the Jews see punishment and a curse sent from Heaven for sins [5]. In order for a divorce to be considered valid, the husband, in the presence of witnesses, must give his wife a so-called divorce letter, “get.” The wife could also initiate the divorce, but in any case, she could not become free without the written consent of her husband.

In the law enforcement practice of the Old Testament legislation on marriage and divorce, for a long time it remained not entirely clear what could be considered a legal basis for divorce. In two undisputed cases, divorce was mandatory under rabbinic law. Firstly, in case of adultery, since in this case further marital communication made the innocent party ritually defiled. Secondly, in the case of infertility of the spouse (for 10 years), since this prevented the fulfillment of the commandment “be fruitful and multiply” [5]. There were disagreements on other issues. There were several rabbinical schools that interpreted differently the phrase from Deut. 24:1 “...she will not find favor in his eyes, because he finds something nasty in her...”.

The conservative school of Shammai was of the opinion that the only legal reason for divorce could be adultery.

The liberal school of Hillel considered the concept of “something nasty in a wife” more broadly, and therefore considered a wife’s grumpy character or a spoiled dinner to be sufficient grounds for divorce. And Hillel’s follower Rabbi Akiva considered even the fact that he simply didn’t like his wife or found a more beautiful one a valid reason for divorce [6]. This interpretation led to numerous abuses, when the husband left his wife at any whim. In defense of abandoned wives, one of the last prophets of the Old Testament, Malachi, sharply accuses husbands of betrayal: “... you betrayed the wife of your youth, although the Lord was a witness between you, betrayed your friend, your lawful wife. And didn’t the Lord make you one, body and spirit? What is the purpose of this one? Seek the offspring bestowed by God. Therefore, take care of your spirit, and do not betray the wife of your youth. To drive away a wife, to hate her, said the Lord God of Israel, is the same as staining oneself with violence, said the Lord of Hosts. Take care of your spirit and do not become traitors” (Malachi 2:14-16) [2]. However, over the next four hundred years, a clear solution to the problem of divorce was not found by the rabbis of the pre-Christian era.

The New Testament teaching on marriage and divorce begins with the question put to Christ by the Israelite teachers of the law as to which of the rabbinical schools he believed was right in justifying divorce.

“And the Pharisees came to Him and, tempting Him, said to Him: Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason? He answered and said to them, Have you not read that He who created in the beginning made them male and female? And he said, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh, so that they are no longer two, but one flesh.” So, what God has joined together, let no man separate. They say to Him: How did Moses command to give a letter of divorce and divorce her? He says to them: Moses, because of your hardness of heart, allowed you to divorce your wives, but at first it was not so; but I say to you: whoever divorces his wife for reasons other than adultery and marries another commits adultery; and he who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. His disciples tell Him: if such is a man’s duty to his wife, then it is better not to marry. He said to them: “Not everyone can receive this word, but to those who have been given it.” (Matt. 19:3-12)

The desire of the Pharisees to test the wandering preacher from Nazareth, who claimed to be called the Messiah, for his knowledge of the Law and rabbinic traditions is quite understandable. However, Jesus does not attempt to reinterpret the Law of Moses. It appeals to God's original intention as recorded in the creation story. “In the beginning” God creates man and woman for each other and declares that such a union serves not simply to satisfy sexual needs, but is the union of two people into “one flesh.” From here follows the logical conclusion that what was originally conceived by the Creator as one should not be destroyed by the whim of man. And Christ adds His prohibition: “what God has joined together, let no man put asunder,” since the marriage bond is something more than a contract between two people: it is a divine combination.

If Moses allowed divorce, then Jesus prohibits it, and declares that divorce with the goal of a new marriage with another person is a clever form of adultery. Divorce in Christ's interpretation is a sign of hardness of heart, and Moses' ruling on the possibility of divorce is a concession to human imperfection, but Jesus' disciples are called to a higher standard - lifelong fidelity in marriage. To let go of a wife, in God’s estimation, means pushing her towards sin or defenseless loneliness in a patriarchal society. Therefore, husbands should take full moral responsibility for the safety of their marriages - with the only exception when the wife breaks the marriage vow with her dissolute behavior.

The shock reaction of Christ’s disciples to such demands is quite understandable: “if this is a man’s duty to his wife, then it is better not to marry.” The bar of righteousness has been raised by Christ to a height absolutely unattainable for “normal” people. After all, marriage, in their opinion, can be attractive only when there is an opportunity to retreat in the event of an unsuccessful match. However, Jesus does not try to encourage them. That which does not conform to God's absolute commandments is sin and falls under divine condemnation. And those indulgences given by the Creator for the sake of the weakness of human nature should not be interpreted as God’s approval of sin itself. And, although Christ Himself realizes that His categoricalness will be supported by few, He insists on the immutability of God’s original plan for marriage: “not everyone can comprehend this word, but to whom it is given.”

Christianity, which began to develop in the second half of the 1st century AD, presented a completely new model of religious and social structure. It emerged from the depths of Judaism, incorporating from it a strict adherence to monotheism and the Holy Scriptures, but, in contrast to the sectarian national isolation of the religion of Israel, Christianity was open to pagan peoples. At the same time, Christianity, as a system of religious ideas, maintained strict conservatism, not assimilating either the rabbinic traditions of Judaism or pagan ancient philosophy and morality. Nevertheless, the surrounding world exerted its influence on the Church, giving rise to new questions and problems in it, including those related to marriage and divorce. For example, should Christians strive to abstain from sexual relations in order to improve spiritually; whether the marriage should continue if one of the spouses is not a Christian (would this be considered “desecration” as in Judaism); Is remarriage acceptable, if yes, then to whom?

The Christian doctrine of marriage was developed in the letters (epistles) of the Apostle Paul to various Christian communities. This topic is covered especially extensively in the message to the church of the city of Corinth, which outlines the answers to the most pressing questions of the community.

First, Paul sharply rejects radical asceticism and advises those in marriage not to disdain sexual relations: “The husband show due favor to his wife; likewise is a wife to her husband. The wife has no power over her body, but the husband does; Likewise, the husband has no power over his body, but the wife does. Do not turn aside from each other, except by consent, ... so that Satan does not tempt you through your intemperance. (1 Cor. 7:3-5).

Secondly, those who are not married are given complete freedom to choose their marital status: “To the celibates and widows I say: it is good for them to remain like me. But if they cannot abstain, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to become inflamed.” In another letter, the apostle confirms his thesis: “Therefore, I desire that young widows should marry, bear children, rule the house...” (1 Tim. 5:14).

Thirdly, Paul confirms the prohibition of Jesus Christ to divorce: “But to those who have entered into marriage I command, not I, but the Lord: a wife must not divorce her husband; but if she divorces, she must remain single, or be reconciled to her husband, and not abandon her husband. his wife" (1 Cor. 7:10-11). The clause “if he gets divorced” is given without indicating the reasons for the divorce. Probably the reason should be quite significant. It is noteworthy that the apostle’s words about divorce here are quite restrained. He does not call for the expulsion of a divorced woman from the community, he does not say “if she divorces, she commits adultery...”. Paul cites a real situation where the ban on divorce is ignored, and puts a categorical ban on remarriage in the event of a divorce, in order to eliminate the temptation to dissolve the marriage in order to enter into a new, more desirable one.

Fourth, Paul considers a new topic that Christ did not touch upon, namely, what to do when one of the spouses is not a Christian. Most likely, such marriages were concluded even before the husband or wife converted to Christianity, and the believing party could doubt the advisability of maintaining such a union. Paul writes: “To the rest I say, and not the Lord: if a brother has an unbelieving wife, and she agrees to live with him, he must not leave her; and a wife who has an unbelieving husband, and he agrees to live with her, should not leave him. For an unbelieving husband is sanctified by a believing wife, and an unbelieving wife is sanctified by a believing husband. Otherwise your children would have been unclean, but now they are holy. If an unbeliever wants to get a divorce, let him get a divorce; the brother or sister is not related in such cases; The Lord has called us to peace.” (1 Cor. 7:12-15). The apostle does not believe that the wives of Christian men are obligated to accept the faith of their husbands (or vice versa). But, despite the apparent danger of “defilement” from an unbelieving spouse, Paul does not advise divorce because “The unbelieving husband is sanctified by the believing wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the believing husband.” In contrast to the attitude towards ritual impurity in Judaism, Christianity states that the “holy” cannot be profaned by the “unclean”; “Holy” is stronger than “uncleanness”; it penetrates into the unholy and sanctifies it. The believer must remain married as long as possible, however, if the unbelieving party wants to end the relationship, the other party is free from the obligations of marriage: “a brother or sister in such cases is not bound.” Does this mean that a believer is allowed to remarry? Paul does not say this directly, but most likely the answer will be yes, but with the amendment he gives a little lower: “Are you united to your wife? don't look for a divorce. Are you left without a wife? don't look for a wife. However, even if you get married, you will not sin; and if the girl marries, she will not sin. But such will have tribulations according to the flesh; and I feel sorry for you.” (1 Cor. 7:27-28).

Summarizing the general provisions of Judeo-Christian dogma and morality, it should be noted that in the Bible, the severance of a marriage relationship is not only not considered the norm, but is regarded as a betrayal towards the abandoned spouse. Almost until the middle of the twentieth century, in countries with a predominant Christian culture (Western Europe, North America and even Russia), the church ban on divorce enjoyed strong social support, which made it extremely unpopular among the main part of society. In modern culture, divorce is so widespread that it is perceived as a morally neutral event, and therefore increasingly progressive.

The philosophy of humanism, which puts first place the human right to a comfortable life, does not know how to overcome this social problem. Increasingly secularized Christianity (both Western and Eastern) is forced to drift along with the main trends of society and de facto bless divorce, bringing theological motives under it. The church and society stopped demanding that their members preserve marriage, considering this as an encroachment on individual rights. So the desire to get a divorce is regarded by them as a personal matter, in which it is advisable not to interfere.

As a result, Western man has nothing to offer to a decaying society, devoid of moral imperatives, in which the institution of the family is discredited. Such a society is doomed to depopulation and anarchy. But anarchy in the house will inevitably be followed by anarchy in the streets. Only a social structure that has ideological unity can stop this anarchy and establish firm order. As you know, a strong, monolithic society is made up of strong families. Therefore, in the confrontation between civilizations, the one that is based on a strong family will be successful. And it is quite possible that in a few decades (and maybe years) the blue flag of the European Union will be replaced by green...

Literature

1. Bible. Books of the Holy Scriptures of the Old and New Testaments. Canonical. Synodal translation.

2. Bible. Books of the Holy Scriptures of the Old and New Testaments. Canonical. Modern Russian translation. – M.: Russian Bible Society, 2011.

3. Divorce statistics for the first quarter of 2010 https://www.kasparov.ru/material.php?id=4BEAA6236E012

4. Heavenly marriage “Rossiyskaya Gazeta” - Federal issue No. 5115 (36) https://www.rg.ru/2010/02/19/svadba.html

5. Israel Ben Shimon. If you are Jewish. – Rostov n/d.: Phoenix, 2001.

6. Pinkington S.M. Judaism/Trans. from English E.G. Bogdanova. – M.: FAIR PRESS, 2000.

7. Troitsky S. Christian philosophy of marriage. – M.: Put, 2001.

8. Wayne Doug. Divorce and modern man. https://www.scienceandapologetics.com/text/158.htm

9. Hayes R. Ethics of the New Testament/Translated from English. – M.: Biblical and Theological Institute of St. Apostle Andrew, 2005.

Does the Bible prohibit marrying a divorced woman?

Inga Telich

Priest Alexy Malyukov answers:

– Yes, it’s hard to argue with the words of Christ. But life is an extremely multifaceted phenomenon. Any rule may have its exceptions. Some people can remarry, while others need to remain single. Let's try to figure this out.

Christ, answering a tricky question: “Is it possible to give a letter of divorce for any reason?” He replies that it’s not like that, and in general it wasn’t like that before. The two were like one flesh. And this meant the merging of not only bodies, but souls and hearts. And in general, marriage is the mystery of unity, as if previously separated and united again.

And they asked because they wanted confirmation of their evil deeds, divorcing a woman for any reason. For over-salted soup, for a rude word, for a wrong look - this list could be continued indefinitely. And it was the woman who suffered most often from this.

That is why Christ is so strict in his words. In essence, warning that any such divorce for domestic reasons gives rise to adultery. What should a woman abandoned because of a trifle do, if not look for a new husband? This is precisely what the word refers to. Warning against hasty decisions on the one hand, and unreasonable behavior on the other.

The reason for divorce, according to the word of Christ, is adultery. Indeed, if a person cheated on you, it can be compared to how a thin vessel breaks. It can no longer be glued together, and even if this is possible, then this vessel will be somehow different. However, even here there is the possibility of restoring the relationship if the spouse has found the strength to forgive.

But if, nevertheless, the tragedy of divorce happened, then the Church gives the person another chance, taking into account the fact that he will now be smarter and learn to live correctly.

If the divorce occurred due to adultery, it is better to refrain from marrying the guilty party. Let loneliness be the punishment for this. After all, no one wants to have a potential traitor in their rear. However, the cardiac sphere is extremely complex. A person can sincerely repent, and then there may still be a chance and opportunity for the happiness that everyone is looking for.

So, Christ’s words are aimed at the fact that everyday issues cannot be the reason for divorce, which means both spouses have the strength to solve all problems peacefully. But if one of the spouses is unbearable, does not want to change, and divorce has become inevitable, then, with the blessing of the confessor, a new marriage is possible, including with a divorced woman.

But - have wisdom in your choice, look ahead, be patient. If a person is incontinent and selfish - which should not be the case in a marriage - then you need to change now. Otherwise, there is a risk of being left alone for life.

Question:

I recently started reading the Bible. As I read, I have questions, some of which I will try to ask you.

1. “...and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery” (Matt. 5:32). Why? As I understand it, if a person is divorced due to adultery on the part of his spouse, then he does not commit adultery by remarrying or getting married again. But if we take the guilty party, because of whose adultery the marriage broke up. Is there really no forgiveness for him?

2. “...I did not come to bring peace, but a sword” (Matthew 10:35). In what sense did Christ speak about the separation of a person from his father, a daughter from her mother, etc. by means of a sword. Why divide?