What is jealousy: signs of jealousy in men, boys, girls, women
The international encyclopedia “Wikipedia” defines the concept of “jealousy” as a “ painful feeling ” based on “ a person’s uncertainty about the fidelity and love of his chosen one .” Any living creature that has feelings can be jealous (for example, dogs are jealous of their owners). Jealousy arises when the “object of passion” provokes his partner into negative emotions. As a result, quarrels, scandals, misunderstandings, hysterics and even fights arise.
Jealousy sharpens all a person’s senses , making his senses confused and his mind clouded. He experiences disappointment, anger, hatred and confusion at the same time and all this literally drives him crazy. Such emotions can only be compared to illness or disease , but not physical, but mental. Imbued with negative feelings, a person commits rash actions and mistakes that can be very difficult to correct.
Each person feels jealousy differently, it depends on how strong the love was, how long the relationship lasted, and what exactly the partner did to offend him. A jealous person's head is teeming with many thoughts . How violently he reacts to different situations is also a consequence of his upbringing and established character traits. For example, egoists easily experience and suppress feelings of jealousy, but insecure individuals turn into madmen.
There is also the opinion of psychologists who claim that jealousy is nothing more than a human need. It maintains interest in a person and enhances passion (so to speak, “throws heat into the fire”), but only in cases where it is present in small (acceptable) quantities. Jealousy can be divided into “healthy” and “unhealthy”, almost fanatical, feelings and it can very rarely be stopped in time.
IMPORTANT: Jealousy is a feeling that can arise for a reason or be completely groundless.
The intensity of this feeling depends on what kind of character a person has and whether he is a woman or a man. This is very important, because each gender experiences the world differently. Male jealousy is based on a sense of self, i.e. – this is a fallen self-esteem, a feeling of dissatisfaction and mistrust. Men begin to hate a woman for provoking such negative feelings in him and aggression replaces anger.
How it manifests itself:
- Scandals
- Clarification of relations
- Rude words
- Unpleasant and humiliating comparisons
- Assault
- Restriction of a woman's freedom
- Prohibitions on behavior and personal habits (clothing, makeup, spending money, leaving the house).
- Controlling your circle of friends and communication
- Time restrictions
Compared to men, women are whiter and harmless . However, their jealousy is characterized by emotionality and originality. Reasons to be jealous often appear “out of the blue” and out of nowhere. When jealous, a woman often appears before a man in a “different light” and does not even think about the fact that such manifestations scare away the opposite sex.
Most often, it is the sense of ownership that is the root cause of jealousy in women. Ladies are afraid of being imperfect, lonely and unattractive and therefore blame men for causing such feelings. In addition, many women are simply not able to provide for themselves, and therefore, having lost a man, they literally lose everything: house, money, gifts. “Stronger” women suffer not so much from jealousy as from having their pride “infringed” and their self-esteem reduced.
How it manifests itself:
- Scandals and quarrels because a man did something wrong or looked in the wrong direction.
- Controlling your partner every minute
- Suspicions of being late or delays at work
- Studying the telephone directory for female names.
- Dissatisfaction with sex
- Reproaches for lack of attention
- Tears and bouts of melancholy
- Secrets
- Assault
- Resentment and humiliation
How does this feeling manifest itself?
Orthodox forum Good word
Let no corrupt word come out of your mouth, but only that which is good for building up the faith, that it may bring grace to those who hear (Eph. 4:29)
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mistrust, jealousy.
Registered: 11 Nov 2004, 17:24
Registered: 03 Nov 2004, 16:00
O all-praised apostle and evangelist John the Theologian, confidante of Christ, our warm intercessor and quick helper in sorrow! Beg the Lord God to grant me (name, content of the petition), and grant forgiveness of all my sins. At the end of my soul, help me, the sinner (name), to get rid of airy ordeals and eternal torment, so that through your merciful intercession I will glorify the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, now and ever, and forever and ever. Amen.
Prayers before the icons of the Mother of God “Softening Evil Hearts”
Prayers before the icons of the Mother of God “Quench my sorrows”
Prayers before the icons of the Mother of God “Joy of All Who Sorrow”
Prayers before the icons of the Mother of God “Tenderness”
Prayers before the Feodorovskaya icons of the Mother of God
I can only help with prayer.
On November 28, I was in the church of Guria, Samon and Aviva, as well as at the relics of Peter and Fevronia, and ordered prayers for you. So pray yourself too.
Congregational prayer always helps.
Imitate St. Mary of Egypt in repentance and self-correction
Registered: 29 Oct 2004, 15:02
Registered: 31 Oct 2004, 15:35
Religion: Orthodox, MP
I am very sad to read about your situation.
If only I could solve everything in one fell swoop.
At all costs, try to save your family.
As a consolation, walk around our site, don’t look for any consolations, everything will get much more confused.
You may be worried that everything in life is changing and you won’t have to endure it indefinitely. Maybe everything will get better.
Therefore, everyone will know that you are My disciples if you have love for one another. John 13:35
Registered: 29 Oct 2004, 18:28
Registered: 28 Oct 2004, 13:10
From: Birch edge
Religion: Orthodox, MP
Registered: 03 Nov 2004, 16:00
If a husband or wife, noticing a jealous feeling or anxiety in himself, cannot tell his spouse about it, and he notices this painful reaction to certain actions or a person, then let him (or she), without being offended by undeserved suspicion, begin such a conversation or, having mentally understood the situation, if possible, abolish it. You should repent of jealousy as quickly as possible in confession, so as not to allow it to grow like a cancerous tumor and take over your entire being. “Jealousy is as fierce as hell; her arrows are arrows of fire” (Song 8:6).
Based on the collection “For advice to the priest,” M.: Danilovsky Blagovestnik, 2002
Imitate St. Mary of Egypt in repentance and self-correction
Registered: 02 Nov 2004, 15:31
Religion: Orthodox, MP
Then I’m terribly worried that I dared to doubt. But what's done is done.
Others live happily without knowing it.
Registered: 26 Nov 2004, 16:13
Religion: Orthodox, MP
And of course don't try to find solace in someone else, it will really only confuse and complicate things. Fire cannot be extinguished with gasoline.
And pray, pray all the time!
The Lord will not leave you!
Registered: 11 Nov 2004, 17:24
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Why does jealousy arise, what are the causes of jealousy?
Reasons for jealousy:
- Mistrust. This happens when a partner doubts a loved one. There are such situations at the stage of “early” relationships when the partners do not know each other well enough. In other cases, the couple has already experienced events where one of the lovers “undermined” their reputation.
- Sex. Dissatisfaction in bed leads to problems in your personal life. Due to dissatisfaction, a person experiences strong tension, which can be read in mood swings, emotionality, the desire to keep everything under control, and lack of self-confidence. As a result, a person engages in self-hypnosis and begins to suspect his partner of literally everything, attributing his own imperfections to him.
- Loneliness. A person is controlled by fear, instilling in him that he may be left alone. This pushes him to hold on to his partner as a “lifeline,” controlling all his steps, actions, words and acquaintances. Surprisingly, at the same time, the jealous person simply ignores his personal shortcomings.
- Unsuccessful relationships. Such relationships may have been present in the past for one of the partners, and out of habit, he transferred this pattern to his present.
- Lack of attention. Lack of gifts, signs of attention from the opposite side, sex, compliments. All this makes a person think that he is not needed, that he is bad and unattractive. Thus, a person gets angry and splashes out all this negativity on his “other half”. At the same time, he himself forgets to give attention to his partner.
- Family model. A jealous attitude towards a partner may be inspired by the behavior pattern of the family of one of the partners and he simply does not know how to behave differently.
- Past relationships. Such jealousy has “unhealthy” qualities. In fact, that relationship was already over and there was no point in “claiming” the person. Some feelings of melancholy, nostalgia and memories arise that lead to a “dead end”.
- Unfaithful relationships. If a partner is truly not faithful to his lover (a very common phenomenon, which is manifested by light flirting, kissing, or even sex on the side), he will suspect him of everything that he himself did.
IMPORTANT: The feeling of jealousy is multifaceted and a person consumed by passion can often find a reason that is different from others. Very often a person “crosses the line”, believing that he must completely possess the person and control every action. You can only get rid of jealousy psychologically by analyzing the entire situation.
How to recognize jealousy by signs? How does it manifest itself?
A strong conspiracy not to be jealous of your husband
If jealousy troubles the heart, but the mind understands that there are no real reasons for it, you can use a special conspiracy. It is very simple, but for it to work, it is not enough to realize that jealousy is unfounded. It is important to really want to get rid of this bad feeling.
Hair spells are especially effective, because they have long been considered a reflection of human energy. The ritual is performed at midnight on the outgoing moon. At midnight you need to light a wax candle (you can take a church one) and cut off a strand of your own hair with a knife. Then you need to heat the blade over the fire and pass it over the hair, holding the knife in your right hand and the hair in your left and saying:
I cut and chop, I kill jealousy!
Afterwards, you must burn your hair, and carefully collect the ashes and scatter them in the wind. Relief should appear immediately. And soon the understanding will come that this terrible feeling is no longer there.
How to overcome, overcome jealousy towards the past of a guy, man, husband, wife, woman, girl?
“Former relationships” is a concept familiar to almost every person. After a breakup, men and women deliberately or accidentally remember their “former” partners and then, along with nostalgia, a feeling of ownership arises. This is partly true, because for some time this person was “yours” and you have every right to miss him.
If this feeling is stopping you from building new relationships, try:
- Come to terms with it. Accept all the facts that the relationship has already come to an end and you are diligently trying to meet a new person, and “old ghosts” may interfere with this.
- Say “thank you.” Thank your ex-partner for the experience, even if the relationship was scandalous and you parted with grievances. In any case, you had good moments and experiences.
- Deal with your emotions. Understand the reasons for negative outbursts; perhaps they will hint to you about what needs to be changed in your life.
- Mentally walk away. Imagine a room or a train station and in your head visualize doors closed in front of a person or leaving the station on a train.
Jealousy of "ex"
Is jealousy a sin or not in Orthodoxy?
The biblical original meaning of jealousy is not the same as it is accustomed to be interpreted at this time. Initially, jealousy was interpreted in completely different ways; in the Greek translation of the Old Testament, jealousy could have multiple interpretations, which included emotions such as rage or rivalry.
Of course, it is not surprising that in Russian jealousy was defined as “fear of someone else’s success, fear of being worse, a terrible, painful desire to possess something without limit.” Simply put, jealousy only had negative labels. Later, the word jealousy was included in the concept of “love” and associated with it. Now jealousy is interpreted as “an emotionally charged feeling towards a partner.”
Jealousy was previously also quite often considered by philosophers and in religion as a feeling of “passion for something”, a reaction to some “wrongness” from a subjective point of view. The Bible quite often mentions “zeal” as the word “zeal.”
For example:
Rome. 12.3, which clearly states “be zealous for hospitality”;
1 Cor. 12.31, which states “be zealous for great gifts”;
1 Cor. 14.1, where it says “be zealous for spiritual gifts”
Also, for the translation of the word zeal, you can thoroughly study in John 2:7, Rom.10:2 where it talks about zeal for God, 19, 2 Cor.11:2, Col. 4:13, Rev. 3:19, and more several.
What to do with pathological jealousy for no reason, is it possible to defeat it?
Fanatical and “unhealthy” jealousy practically destroys personal life. Only in rare cases can it be eliminated on your own. To get rid of pathological jealousy, try:
- Attend psychological trainings
- Seek help from a psychiatrist (perhaps he will prescribe you antidepressants and vitamins for the health of the nervous system, and in the worst case, treatment in a sanatorium).
- Sign up for a creative club - it will distract you physically, and therefore mentally.
- Go on a trip that has always been desired or make your cherished dream come true.
- Change your place of residence, throw out your phone contacts, ask your loved ones not to remember THAT person’s name.
How to cure jealousy forever?
Unfortunately, it is impossible to develop immunity to jealousy as a disease. There is only one way to help yourself as much as possible as a jealous person - learn to respect, appreciate, and most importantly - love yourself.
What do you need:
- Notice your strengths
- Understand that your shortcomings are only in your head, not in reality.
- Flirt with the opposite sex (earning experience and raising your self-esteem).
- Delight yourself more often with gifts and surprises
Prayer, conspiracy against jealousy: text
Try reading prayers in church about your mental health, forgive your ex-partners and wish them only the best.
Prayer for jealousy
Conspiracy of jealousy
