How to overcome despondency? — practical advice from a priest

How to overcome despondency? — practical advice from a priest

Estimated reading time: less than a minute.

On the Instagram broadcast of the Thomas magazine, Archpriest Peter Guryanov , rector of the church in honor of the Icon of the Mother of God “All-Tsarina” in Dimitrovgrad, answered a reader’s question about how to cope with despondency.

Archpriest Peter GURYANOV

The main thing is that if you are overcome by thoughts that the Lord does not love you, that you are unworthy of Communion, you need to drive them away immediately. You must not just go, but run to the temple and always remember: the Lord did not accept any sinner!

I can give some more advice based on my personal experience. I, too, am an ordinary person, and despondency is not an empty phrase for me. Sports or any physical activity helps me a lot. Our Nizhny Novgorod seminary, where I studied, is attached to the monastery, and the abbot always told us: “Do you want to overcome despondency? Here you go, shovels, pitchforks, rakes!” And it helped. Physical labor knocks out of a person both despondency and, paradoxically, a lasting feeling of fatigue. But this option is more suitable for residents of rural areas. City dwellers can find another type of physical activity - even just any handicraft, such as embroidery or knitting. The main thing is that your hands work.

Some books also help me get rid of despondency. For example, you can read “Letters to the Olympiad” by St. John Chrysostom. His words addressed to his faithful assistant are relevant now more than ever. I also advise you to read the Optina elders, who more than once spoke about the importance of work on the path to overcoming the sin of despondency.

Another way from personal experience. Our church, which is under construction, is located on the territory of a hospital where cancer patients are treated, and I take care of all these buildings. It happens that you come to a child, find out his story, and at the age of fifteen he was twice in intensive care, survived a coma... Then any despondency or grumbling disappears from me. During such meetings, the understanding that we are fabulously rich people and that we have everything becomes sharper. When you fall into despair, go help those who are suffering, communicate with them, and if this is not possible, then at least remember these boys and girls who would like to lead an ordinary life, but are forced to fight for it. Pray for them, even if you don’t know their names, just in your own words, and the Lord will definitely send you consolation.

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Live broadcast with father Peter Guryanov

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Prepared by Anastasia Spirina

Negative influence

What dangers does despondency hide for a person?

1. The main one is that melancholy extends to both the mental and physical state of a person. He doesn’t want to do anything, meet anyone, talk, etc.
2. As a rule, people of an egoistic nature are susceptible to this condition, since most of their time they are busy with themselves. They think about themselves, engage in soul-searching, and so on.
3. The danger is that if you don’t try to get out of this state, you can fall into complete despair.
4. One of the symptoms of sadness is depression. This condition is considered a disease in some countries. It should be treated under the supervision of specialists.
5. If you cannot get out of such a state as despondency, this can lead to thoughts of suicide.
6. In a depressed state, a person’s thoughts may come to the conclusion that he is worthless and life has no meaning.
7. This condition leads to decreased ability to work. It also causes a lot of trouble for the people around you. Communicating with a person who is in a state of despondency is quite difficult. Not everyone is able to be patient with a person with such an attitude.

What signs can be used to determine that a person is sad?

Dejection is a condition that can be identified by both external and internal signs. There are two main gradations. They can also be used to determine the presence of despondency. The first includes the emotional characteristics that are inherent in this state. The second includes physical manifestations.

What is the emotional state of a person when he is depressed?

1. Feelings of pity and resentment for oneself.
2. The impossibility of expecting anything good. A person who experiences despondency is in bad shape.
3. Anxious mood.
4. Bad feelings.
5. Low self-esteem. A person thinks that there is no happiness in life.
6. What previously brought positive emotions does not bring any joy in a state of despondency.
7. An indifferent attitude towards everything that happens appears.

What physical features appear when you are depressed?

1. There are problems with sleep.
2. A person begins to eat a lot or, on the contrary, his appetite decreases.
3. Fatigue appears quickly.

The power of prayer in times of sadness

In Orthodoxy, depression and despondency are equated with mortal sins. Therefore, it is important to quickly deal with a bad mood, otherwise it can develop into something more serious. For example, a serious illness may develop. Depressed people are often prone to making rash decisions. Some even commit suicide in this state.

Melancholy, despondency and bad mood appear due to the lack of positive changes, fun moments and variety in life. This is due to the lifestyle of most people, who spend almost all their time at work. Moreover, even on weekends, they rarely engage in active recreation, preferring the sofa and TV.

Prayer is designed to help fight the routine and dullness of life. Visiting church and reading prayer texts help a person:

• tune into a calm mood;
• pacify your fears and concerns;
• find peace of mind;
• overcome despair;
• alleviate longing for a deceased relative;
• find the strength to fight and overcome all the obstacles encountered on the path of life.

Pronunciation of sacred texts allows you to receive the help and protection of saints. Thanks to the prayer service, people drive away sinful and evil thoughts, and are also distracted from the everyday bustle, finding salvation in the Lord God.

Prayer is considered more effective than drugs. Pills can only temporarily relieve melancholy. They remove the symptoms, but not the cause of the bad mood. The prayer service influences a person’s soul, healing his mental suffering and pacifying his emotions.

Turning to many saints also removes illness. Very often, prolonged depression leads to a significant deterioration in a person’s well-being. Dejection can cause a serious illness, which without spiritual and medicinal treatment may well end in death.

One of the manifestations of melancholy and depression are various mental disorders. The best medicine for eliminating such violations is turning to the saints. Prayer is especially useful for people who have suicidal tendencies.

A prayer service can normalize a person’s state of mind, restore him to cheerfulness, and also give him peace and tranquility. Since the reasons for the appearance of a bad mood are varied, different petitions are read to overcome a difficult stage of life. Various saints can provide help and support, as well as protect from harmful influences and sinful thoughts. But the strength of the read request will be different in each case.

The choice of prayer largely depends on the reason that provoked depression or despondency. To raise your spirit and improve your emotional state, prayer requests are read in front of the following images:

• Holy Great Martyr Barbara;
• Saint Tikhon;
• Righteous John of Kronstadt;
• Rev. Ephraim;
• Nikolai Ugodnik;
• Martyr Tryphon;
• The Mother of God in front of the icon of “Unexpected Joy”.

The prayer to the Virgin Mary is considered the most powerful. Appealing to other saints is also effective, but in certain life situations. Before prayer, you can light a candle near the image. Its flame will already have a pacifying effect.

To receive help, you need to sincerely believe and conduct a prayer service with all your heart.

Dejection is a sin. Religious point of view

There are two types of despondency. The first type is a state that completely consumes a person and causes loss of spirit. And the second type of despondency is associated with anger and irritability. Regardless of the type, despondency is a sin.

A person who is in this state may begin to blame other people for his misfortunes. The more he plunges into himself, the more he blames others. Also, the number of people who are considered culprits is increasing. A person develops anger and hatred towards all people with whom he comes into contact in one way or another.

You should understand: everything that happens to us is a consequence of our actions. If someone finds himself in a situation that makes him uncomfortable, then he created it himself. In order to get out of it, you need to start acting differently.

You also need to remember that the more angry you are at circumstances or an unfavorable situation, the worse it will be. And if you accept everything humbly, the situation will resolve itself. There is no need to drive yourself to despair. It can lead to thoughts of suicide.

Conquering the disease

How can you overcome despondency? This can be done through three basic practices that can help a person cope with this condition.

1. Help from a specialist, namely a psychologist. If a person is depressed, the doctor may prescribe special medications. They will help you get out of this situation.
2. Religion and faith in God help people reassess values ​​and look at life differently.
3. Supporting the spirit through sports activities. It is necessary to exercise and lead a healthy lifestyle.

Dejection is a state in which a person feels depressed and unwanted. At the first manifestations, an effort should be made to get out of apathy. You can’t give in to despondency; you need to force yourself to switch to other activities and stop self-searching.

Consequences, how to deal with them

Why should this sin be avoided at all costs? It would seem that there is no particular danger in a bad mood. But the holy fathers warn that this path leads to the abyss. A person, falling under the influence of a depressive state, slides deeper and deeper. Problems grow like a snowball, which can ultimately lead to an unwillingness to live. And suicide is the only sin that cannot be prayed away , because by committing it, a person turns away from God.
The worst thing is that despair makes yesterday's Christian lose faith in God. For him, the Lord is no longer omnipotent, good and unchanging. By falling into sinful murmuring, the unfortunate person thereby rejects the salvation that Christ brought to the world. Humility gives way to pride, faith to arrogance. This is how Satan captures many souls. In fact, despondency makes you torment already here, and beyond the boundaries of earthly existence these torments intensify many times over.

This is what ordinary self-pity can lead to, and yet it is very characteristic of people of our time. How to deal with manifestations of weakness? You can also read about this from the holy righteous:

• Attacks of laziness and relaxation are treated with ordinary compulsion . Without it, any endeavor will fail.
• You shouldn't indulge yourself in everything. For every “I don’t want” there is a “need” . Getting up early, going to church, reading prayers - willpower is developed through overcoming one's own weaknesses. The only way.
• If you make at least one small victory over laziness every day, over time you can get an impressive result. The secret of success is very simple - regularity, consistency, consistency.

Everything good in life comes in exchange for effort . The salvation of the soul is also accomplished - through compulsion, “taken by force,” as they say in the Gospel. To do this, you don’t need to perform great feats somewhere on the edge of the earth, but simply work on yourself day after day.

You can imagine the soul as a field overgrown with thorns (these are sins). To sow useful plants, you first need to weed out the weeds. But at first, the work may seem simply impossible. And here you may want to give up. This is exactly what the monks warn about - you cannot lose heart and give up! Even if you cultivate a small area every day, over time the field can grow a good crop.

Reasons for appearance

What could be the reasons for despondency?

1. Pride. If a person is sensitive to any failures or statements made in his direction, he can easily become despondent. This hurts his self-esteem. But if a person does not take everything to heart, then he will not fall into despair. Then he is calm about what is happening around him.
2. Failure to satisfy desires can also make some people depressed. Moreover, the more a person succumbs to it, the more the desires themselves lose their meaning.
3. In addition to the above reasons for despondency, there are also those that can appear in people who are strong in spirit. These include the absence of grace, the cessation of any activity by a person. Boredom may set in. Also, sad events can cause despondency. For example, the departure of a loved one or the loss of something. And even in this case, one should not fall into sad thoughts about the injustice of the world. Death is the natural end of life, and we all lose something or someone in life.
4. Dejection can arise due to illnesses that accompany a person.