Is it possible to hold a memorial service earlier than the date of death - a memorial service a day earlier or later? Is it celebrated six months from the date of death? Is it possible to commemorate later than the date of death?

Creativity › Signs › A year after a person’s death: commemoration on the anniversary, is it possible to commemorate 40 days earlier

A wake is a ritual performed to honor the memory of the deceased . The basis of a wake is a joint meal, arranged by loved ones in the house of the deceased person, or in the dining room.

Funeral services are carried out by:

on the day of death;
three days after death - the day of the funeral, when the soul goes to another world;
on the ninth day;
on the fortieth day;
the memorial meal is held six months after the death, and then on all subsequent anniversaries.

As usual, relatives or close people of the deceased come to the wake. It is important to remember that you cannot drive away those who come to honor the memory of the deceased. As a rule, wakes are organized not for guests and not for the sake of a feast, but with the goal of remembering the deceased and praying for his repose. It is especially important to read a prayer for the deceased before the funeral meal. Priests advise reading the seventeenth Kathisma from the Psalter and the prayer “Our Father” before starting to eat.

Shifting the date of the funeral
Memorial Day
Recommendations from clergy
Comments and advice

Shifting the date of the funeral

It happens that the memorial day falls on a church holiday, or on weekdays, when it is not possible to leave work in connection with the preparation of everything necessary for the funeral meal. As a result, the question arises: is it possible to postpone the date of commemoration?

The priests believe that the meal can be held earlier or later than the exact date of death. If there are good reasons that prevent you from holding a memorial dinner, you should focus, first of all, on them. However, if there are no compelling reasons to postpone the funeral meal to another day, it is better not to do this, because the afterlife has its own rules. On this day, it is better to focus on good deeds, for example, distributing funeral treats to people in need.

Funerals should not be held during Easter and Holy Week of Lent. These weeks everything is focused on the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, as well as the news of his return to life. Therefore, if the date set aside for the funeral dinner coincides with these periods, it is best to move the funeral meal to the day of Radonitsa - the day when the deceased are remembered.

If Memorial Day falls on the eve of the Christmas holidays, it would be more correct if the commemoration is moved to January 8th. Such an event is taken as a good omen, because the wake is dedicated to the event of birth into an endless life in another world.

The priests also recommend remembering that you should first pray for the deceased. Therefore, the day before the memorial meal, it is recommended to order the Liturgy for the burial of the Soul of the deceased and the Panikhida for the memorial day. And the memorial meal can be postponed to one of the first days off of subsequent anniversaries of death. However, it is not advisable to postpone the wake, organized on the fortieth day after repose, to an early date.

What is pomina?

A memorial service is a ritual performed to honor the memory of a deceased person.
A social event, that is, a meal, turns out to be a kind of basis for a wake, which the relatives of the deceased arrange in his home, in a cemetery or in another place (cafes, canteens, restaurants). Funerals are held several times:

on the day of death or the next day;
on the third day after death - usually the day of the funeral;
on the ninth day;
on the fortieth day;
in the future, memorial dinners are held on the sixth month from the moment of death (although the Panikhida is not celebrated in the church during this period), and then on all subsequent anniversaries.

When it comes to memorial tables, devout Christians adhere to anniversaries. Commemoration in the church on days 3, 9 and 40 is based on centuries-old temple practice. For two days after death, the human soul is present on Earth and visits the places where it liked to stay during life. On the third, the soul goes to God for worship. The next week, angels show the soul the abode of saints and the splendor of heaven; on the ninth day, the soul is again led to worship God, after which it is sent to hell for 30 days.

During this time, being in the underworld shows all 9 circles and places of torment of sinners. On the fortieth day, the soul ascends to heaven to worship God, and then the Lord decides where the soul will live until the Last Judgment.

Memorial Day

Each religion sets aside a specific date for the memorial day, when relatives or simply close people remember the deceased. If, due to urgent circumstances, it was not possible to honor the memory of loved ones who have died on the day of their death, this must be done on the memorial day.

In the Orthodox faith, the Tuesday of the second week after Easter is set aside for the memorial day. However, this is not the only day when you can remember your loved ones. In addition to Radonitsa, there are five more days dedicated to the memory of the deceased;
In the Catholic faith, the memorial day falls on November 2. Commemoration on the third, seventh and thirtieth days may not suit you;
In the religion of Islam, the main task is to remember the deceased through prayer, to do good deeds on his behalf: to help orphans and poor people. In this religion, it does not matter at all on what day after the repose of the soul the memorial meal will be held. It is important that no one should know in whose name these acts are committed;
In Buddhism, the day of obedience - the Ulambana holiday - falls on the first half of the seventh month according to the Lunar calendar.

We remember at home

Commemoration of the dead is impossible without prayer. Not everyone led a righteous life, and their souls may experience terrible torment. Only through intense prayer to the Lord can we help these restless souls find peace. And the prayer appeal to God on a sad anniversary should be special.

Most often, a memorable date follows a certain scenario:

Funeral service at the cemetery. relatives determine in advance where and how the funeral table will be organized;
all close friends of the deceased are invited to the funeral;
a lithium or memorial service is ordered in the church;
alms are distributed to those in need;
after the service, loved ones go to the cemetery, light a candle on the grave, lay flowers, and read a prayer;
It all ends with a funeral meal.

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Recommendations from clergy

Everyone knows that people who have passed on to another world should be remembered, but people do not often understand for what purpose this should be done. Do not forget that there is a connection between the living and the dead. Therefore, after the death of a person, his loved ones are restless, there is anxiety and sadness in their souls, they often dream of the dead who ask for food or to provide them with some kind of help.

It is generally accepted that after such dreams a person should pray, visit a temple, and do some good deed (help the poor, orphans). All this beneficence has a good influence on the souls of the dead. If it is not possible to arrange a memorial service on the appointed day, do not be upset. You can leave a note for the clergyman, and he will conduct it himself.

The spiritual state of a person also influences the state of the deceased in the afterlife, in another world in order to help them. To do this, you should begin to change, first of all, yourself and the society around you. To begin with, it would be nice to free yourself from bad habits, forgive all your offenders, not bear grudges against them, start praying, visiting churches, reading the Bible, helping others and orphans.

During the commemoration, one should remember the purpose of a kind of ritual. When saying a general prayer, it is better to ask the Lord God to endow the deceased with the Kingdom of Heaven and give rest to his Soul.

The most serious sin

Life was given to man by God, and only He alone has the right to take it away. It is known that any sin can be cleansed by repentance. Even the sin of murder. Suicides commit suicide, and they no longer have the opportunity to repent, thus they fall away from God.

However, not everything is so simple, and each suicide that occurs must be assessed separately, since a person is capable of committing suicide both consciously and unconsciously, being in a state of some kind of mental disorder. And the issue of the funeral service and further church commemoration of the baptized suicide lies within the jurisdiction of the ruling bishop.

If such a tragedy occurs, one of the relatives of the deceased needs to contact the church hierarch with a request to resolve all church requirements in relation to the deceased. If such permission is received, it will be possible to commemorate him according to established custom.

It is possible and necessary to remember a person who died as a result of suicide in home prayer, and also, most importantly, to do good deeds and give alms in his memory.

Basic Rules

The rules for holding a memorial service in 1 year are such that the event must first begin with a visit to the church. Only after relatives have ordered a special service can they go to the cemetery and perform a civil memorial service.

After this, the relatives must clean up the grave, mention how good the person was, what good deeds he did. It would also be a good idea to bring fresh flowers. It is very important to remember that you are allowed to go to the cemetery only in the first half of the day.

After completing these steps, you can start eating. It is permissible to carry it out not only in the house of the deceased, but also in a cafe. The clergy do not advise having a luxurious dinner; the dishes should be quite simple. As for alcohol, only red wine is allowed to drink; vodka cannot be placed on the table.

Interpretation by time of day

In addition to the specific day of the week when the church allows or prohibits visiting the cemetery, the time of day is also taken into account.

In the morning

Ancient ancestors always said that one should visit the cemetery early in the morning, when the sun has risen, since it is at these moments that the Lord releases the souls of the dead to earth. By late afternoon, even at lunchtime, this road is closed, so contact with your loved ones will be lost.

Mediums note that the most favorable time to visit the churchyard is from 6 am to 12 noon. At this time, energy exchanges between the worlds of the living and the dead freeze, and dark forces are not able to harm.

During the day

During the daytime, you can also plan to visit the grave, clean them and remember your own relatives. The main thing is to have time to do everything before dark. On the other hand, mediums do not advise visiting the churchyard after lunch - the energy exchange between worlds increases, and the dead can harm a living person. This is especially true for people who are suspicious and emotionally weak, whom the slightest rustle in the churchyard can throw them into panic. Therefore, it is worth postponing the visit until the next morning.

In the evening

The evening is also undesirable in relation to the time of visiting the graveyard - in this statement the church and folk signs are united. And superstitions say that the dead can rise from their graves and frighten the living. And simply anyone alive can disturb the souls of the departed, which can anger them.

At night

Night is also undesirable, and in categorical form it is undesirable to visit the graveyard - powerful streams of the other world penetrate into the world of the living and can cause harm both on a mental and physical level. Plus, church ministers give a simple and reasonable explanation of this prohibition - often the social elements of society that are not as dead as the living, not always positive, can cause harm. Homeless people and the mentally ill, bandits and even packs of dogs - they all pose a real danger at night for everyone alive.

Comments and advice

Why can't you remember on Monday? The Church answers this question unequivocally. You can commemorate the deceased on any day of the week, except for great Orthodox holidays such as Easter, Annunciation, Trinity and others. Holy Week (the week before Easter) is also considered forbidden. What then is the reason for the emergence of such prejudice among people before the commemoration on this day. Most likely this is due to the belief that Monday is a hard day, as the Russians believed since ancient times. They never started new things on this day.

Signs and superstitions about funerals

Do not clink glasses when drinking at a wake; you will take someone else’s grief with you.
Do not lend tables and chairs for a funeral, as you will attract death into the house.
Get drunk at a funeral, doom your children to alcoholism.
Don't laugh or sing at this event, you'll get yourself into trouble.
You cannot quarrel or swear at the funeral table, especially for blood relatives of the deceased. His soul may be upset and severely punish you for showing disrespect.

Commemoration in church

The most important thing for remembering the deceased is not the meal, but prayer. If the deceased was a Christian, there is nothing more valuable to him than prayer on the anniversary of death. In addition, clergy advise relatives to refrain from a luxurious dinner and alcohol on the anniversary of death.

Lunch should be quite simple and modest. Funerals for 1 year and all subsequent times should absolutely not turn into a cheerful feast, since such a pastime is not welcomed by Christian traditions.

In addition to personal prayer, you must order a commemoration in the church for the year:

remembrance at the proskomedia. This rite represents the first part of the liturgy, during which the priest takes out small pieces from the prosphora for peace and health.
most often the “sorokoust” is ordered, then the deceased will be commemorated at 40 services in a row;
memorial service. Usually held in churches on Saturdays or Sundays, but if necessary, you can arrange with the priest to hold it on another day;
lithium. Another common type of funeral service. It can be done at any time. It is also possible for a priest to visit the cemetery.

The most important condition is that the deceased is remembered by all his relatives. The priest does not always know the deceased personally, so he cannot express the emotions that friends and relatives experience.

The priest, in fact, is only the performer of the ritual. The rules of the event allow for ordering the reading of the Psalter. This service is more often carried out in monasteries, since it is designed for a long time. Depending on the size of the donation, the service will be held for a month, six months or even a year.

It is important to know!
When ordering a service in a church, you can include in the note not only the name of the deceased, but also other deceased relatives.