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The Ninth Commandment is often seen as a prohibition against slandering or slandering others, but it covers a much broader range of issues.
"You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor"
"Easy" sin
The ninth commandment teaches that you must not lie to yourself or others. It prohibits lies in all its forms, as well as all kinds of gossip and gossip.
Unfortunately, we often observe that people with surprising ease allow themselves to be insincerity or even outright lies. A person understands the seriousness of such commandments as “thou shalt not kill,” “thou shalt not steal,” and “thou shalt not commit adultery,” or at least is aware of the gravity of the sin against them. With the ninth it happens completely differently. As a priest and a young father, I observe with alarm that not only adults, but also children lie. The child understands that deception gives a greater chance of getting what he wants. Noticing all this, you involuntarily think about the nature of lies.
Source of lies
A lie is a distortion of the truth. For us Christians, truth is the Lord: “Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). If a lie is a distortion of the truth, then its source is the one who resists God and fights with Him, that is, the devil: “Your father is the devil; and you want to do the lusts of your father. He was a murderer from the beginning and did not stand in the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks his own way, for he is a liar and the father of lies” (John 8:44).
It was with lies that the devil seduced the first people in paradise when he asked whether it was true that God forbade eating from every tree. He deliberately distorts the words of God and thanks to this he tries to find an approach to Adam and Eve: “The serpent was more cunning than all the beasts of the field that the Lord God created. And the serpent said to the woman: Did God truly say: You shall not eat from any tree in the garden? And the woman said to the serpent: We can eat fruit from the trees, only from the fruit of the tree that is in the middle of the garden, God said, do not eat it or touch it, lest you die. And the serpent said to the woman: No, you will not die, but God knows that on the day that you eat of them, your eyes will be opened, and you will be like gods, knowing good and evil. And the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes and desirable because it gave knowledge; and she took of its fruit and ate; And she gave it also to her husband, and he ate” (Gen. 3:1-6).
Having fallen for his trick, the first people began to lie - to God, to each other, to themselves. A lie becomes not only an act, but a damage to nature, a disease that still affects humanity. There is probably no person who has not been distorted by lies from within. The Holy Scripture speaks about this: “Every man is a lie” (Ps. 116:2), “God is faithful, but every man is a liar” (Rom. 3:4).
It should be noted that some philosophers, sociologists, and anthropologists justify lies from the point of view of the history of society. They say that if there were no lies, people would not be able to build relationships with each other: there are situations when, having told the truth, you simply cannot find an approach to your neighbor. It turns out that a great merit in the development of human society lies precisely in the ability of people to lie to each other. I think this is an ambiguous statement, let’s leave it to thinkers, and we, as believers, will consider lies from the point of view of Christian asceticism.
Everyday habit or grave sin?
It happens that a person hides the truth in order to achieve some goal. For example, he embellishes his role in a successful business for the sake of praise or exaggerates the size of problems in order to achieve pity. Over time, untruths cease to be perceived as harmful to the soul. The heart grows hard. As St. Anthony the Great notes, the fear of God disappears.
The Lord says that the one who deceives is the son of the devil (see John 8:44). The sin of wickedness brings with it the destruction of the soul. As it is written in the Psalter, man “conceived iniquity, was pregnant with malice, and gave birth to lies” (Ps. 7:15). “Evil returns to him” (see Ps. 7:16, 17).
The book “The Acts of the Apostles” describes an incident that shows the bitter consequences of deception. The spouses Ananias and Sapphira sold their estate and decided to cheat. The apostles were told that they were donating all the money they received, but in fact they only donated part of it and kept part of it for themselves (see Acts 5:2). But the deceivers suffered God's punishment. During the accusatory speech of the Apostle Peter, Ananias fell dead. When Sapphira came, wanting to reason with her, the disciple of Christ asked a question about money. The woman said the same thing, and the same thing happened to her that happened to her husband (see Acts 5:1-11).
Spouses could dispose of the property as they pleased: sell or keep it for themselves, donate all or only part of the money. But they decided to lie to the apostle, on whom God’s grace rested, and dared to “tempt the Holy Spirit” (see Acts 5:3, 9).
This episode leaves one in awe and at the same time helps to listen to the voice of conscience. Often we hide behind the truth and, like Ananias and Sapphira, we lie “just a little.” As St. Ephraim the Syrian said, we mix lies with truth so that the deception remains hidden.
It seems that lying is easier and faster. However, a situation arises when lies come out. Then you have to either confess or deceive again. As in the parable about the young man who did not want to reveal his celibate life and said that he was married. The questions didn't stop there. The young man began to get confused. When the interlocutors asked what the names of his children were, he could not resist and said: “One is called Lie, and the other is Lie. I don’t have any wife.” With each new deception, it becomes more and more difficult to admit it. The young man had to reveal the truth, but with his cunning he aroused the mistrust of his interlocutors and ridicule.
The forbidden list includes all existing churches in Istanbul / Photo: Pelagia Zamyatina, “Evening Moscow”
There is another unpleasant consequence: when we lie, we ourselves stop trusting other people, we begin to think about others that they, too, are telling lies. On the train, a person asks for money for the treatment of a child, and the liar will think about him: “He’s saving for another car, he’s a liar.” And he refuses to help. Suspicion leads to indifference, indifference to the fate of another.
The only way out is to honestly explain the situation. Let him choose his words carefully and admit that he is guilty. It takes courage to ask for forgiveness for bad actions and determination to correct them.
One sin of lying can destroy all our efforts on ourselves. I remember the story about the construction of the ship. The builders were looking for logs for the stern. We picked up strong, good ones, only on one we noticed a small wormhole. It was a pity to throw it away, we decided to use it in business. The ship was built. For several years he sailed the seas, and then on a clear day he sank. When the divers sank under the water, they discovered that the entire bottom of the ship had been eaten by worms. So even for the most virtuous ascetic, lying becomes a mortal sin, destroying him from the inside.
We complain that there is a lot of deception and injustice in the world. If we want more trust and truth, we must first take care of ourselves. It is necessary to be more attentive to what we say, to hate lies and love the law of God (see Ps. 119:163). In this we have a faithful assistant - conscience.
The opinion of columnists may not coincide with the point of view of the editors
How do people lie?
There is a book that has not lost and certainly will not lose its relevance - the work of St. Dorotheus of Palestine “Soulful Teachings and Messages.” The ninth word in it is called: “The teaching that one should not lie.” In it, the monk notices that people lie in three ways: with words, with thoughts, and with their very lives.
Lying with words is the most common manifestation of lying, when a person justifies himself, hides his actions, or tries to achieve the desired goal in any way. Needless to say that it is capable of destroying normal human relationships, friendships, and family? Therefore, advice: before you lie, you need to mentally put on the scales what you want to get and what you have, but can lose as a result of lying. I think this can be sobering and help you make the right decision. As life experience shows, an unpleasant and bitter truth, which requires a huge amount of internal work from a person, is better than an easy and, at first glance, promising lie. However, I want to say right away that this is not a universal rule and not a ready-made solution for all problems.
Mental lying is when we draw conclusions about people based on our guesses. For example, I saw a person, created his image in my head - most often through the prism of my own passions - and passed off this desired image as real. It would seem - a trifle, what's wrong? I thought - okay. But we treat a person based on the picture that appears in our head, therefore, most likely it will be a biased attitude. Therefore, Abba Dorotheos says: “...never believe your guesses, for a crooked rule makes a straight one crooked. Human opinions are false and harm those who indulge in them.”
Lies come to life when our inner content does not correspond to our outer actions. The Monk Dorotheos gives the following examples: when a conscious fornicator talks about abstinence, or a greedy person talks about how good it is to give alms and share with the poor. In our lives, such lies are often observed on social networks, when people post bright, beautiful photographs during a boring life or publish smart thoughts, most often from others, in the absence of their own considerations. Thus, a person tries to look smarter, wittier or happier than he really is. Maybe he is seeking the approval of others in this way, but I don’t think that such duality can make his life more meaningful or meaningful.
Lying is a sin. What about white lies?
Thank you very much for your question. It is said in the Torah (Shemot 23:7): “Stay away from lies.” It talks about the laws of the Jewish court ( beit din
) and false witness, however, according to some
Rishonim
(early commentators), this passage is addressed to all people and commands them to distance themselves and protect themselves from any kind of lies and untruths. The Torah says about many things “beware of this” or “beware, do not violate...”, but here the stronger form is used - “move away.” This is due to the fact that lying is a particularly unpleasant and unworthy thing for a person.
Unfortunately, most often people ask about in what cases it is allowed to tell a lie, and few people ask about when it is prohibited. But the one who tells a lie violates the prohibition of the Torah. The prohibition is violated even if during a conversation a person distorts only minor details, which turns his speech into a “mixture” of true and false, or even if what he says only appears to be untrue. Therefore, first of all, it is necessary to study in detail the rather complex laws about what is considered untrue and in what cases in order to avoid possible violations.
But since you are already interested in exceptions to the rules, we will present some laws related to this. Sometimes, in order to avoid conflicts and unpleasant situations, it is allowed to change some things. The Torah places great emphasis on the laws of human relationships, and the ultimate goal is to lead people to unity and love. Discord and hatred have always been the cause of many ills in the world (including assimilation and persecution), and to avoid this, in various awkward situations, the Torah also allows the use of “non-standard” methods, that is, the use of inaccurate information to prevent a brewing conflict.
Example:
You are in a hurry to get home. On the way, one of the passersby tries to stop you to ask for a pen. He needs to write something down urgently. You answer while running: “I don’t have a pen.”
.
By law, it is allowed to say that you do not have a pen, so as not to offend him, since you currently do not have the opportunity to provide him with a pen. There is also an opinion that, if necessary, you can tell a lie only if your words can be understood in two ways (for example, “I have a pen at home”: the first option is that the person forgot a pen at home; the second option is that he has a pen at home, but it’s also in your pocket).
However, each time you need to carefully weigh whether it is worth telling a lie in this case.
The Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Ketubot, discusses how the bride should be praised and glorified before the groom at the wedding feast. There is such a commandment - to please the groom throughout the first week after the wedding. Including, you need to praise his fiancee, because what could please and inspire him more?
The sages of the Shamaya school say: you can praise only those qualities of the bride that really exist. That is, one cannot glorify her for non-existent qualities, since lying is prohibited: for example, a grumpy bride can be praised for her intelligence and thriftiness, but not for her character. The sages of the Ilel school say: every bride is beautiful and virtuous (this can be said to every groom).
But what about the commandment “Stay away from lies”? The fact is that in the eyes of the groom himself, she is really quite beautiful and virtuous (or at least can become so), and he is sincerely confident of this.
If a person bought a low-quality item and there is no way to return it, you should not tell him about the shortcomings or the inflated price. It is only allowed to tell him about her merits and successful acquisition in order to bring him joy.
The sages teach us that we should always try to say nice things to people and praise them for their good qualities, even if they do not yet have such qualities. This behavior allows people to get closer and rejoice together (it is believed that it is this behavior that awakens and strengthens good aspirations in a person much faster).
It is allowed to distort some things or make up stories in order to reassure another person in a difficult moment.
One day, while visiting Mrs. Rubina’s store, a wallet containing seven hundred shekels was pulled out of her bag. She was very upset and remembered this for many years. One fine day she received a letter. In this letter, the former thief wrote about his difficult life and how he regrets what happened. In conclusion, he wrote that he had begun to keep the commandments and therefore decided to return the money to the owner. The envelope contained bills worth seven hundred shekels
.
In fact, this letter was written by a close relative of Mrs. Rubina. She knew that the wallet incident was still causing her distress, and she wanted to help her
.
It is allowed to change information when they want to inform a person about the death of loved ones or other difficult events.
It is allowed to take the blame upon oneself in order to save another person from shame.
A teacher or sage, who is asked out of curiosity whether he has studied a certain treatise, may answer that he has not studied it (even if he has), and this will not be considered a violation. On the contrary, such behavior is approved by the Torah, because it often saves a person from pride.
It is allowed to change some things and even tell lies when a person asks about things that are not customary to talk about out loud.
A person from whom things have been stolen is allowed to use various tricks and elements of lies to get them back. The same applies to the case when they want to oblige a person to pay taxes, when by law he is exempt from these taxes. (In this case we are talking about corrupt systems).
There is no prohibition against writing "danger" or "glass" on drawers or cabinets to prevent damage or theft.
It is permissible to deceive the person who is trying to deceive you (and cause harm).
It is allowed to deceive when it comes to things that threaten human health, and even more so when it comes to matters of life and death. This is also acceptable if you are afraid of the evil eye or the envy of other people.
In all of these cases, when it is permissible to tell a lie, you can do so only if it does not happen on a regular basis. However, there are also opposing opinions.
If there is a different way to achieve a goal or if inaccurate information could harm other people, you should avoid telling lies.
Best regards, Yakov Shub
The answer used materials from the book of Rav Yitzchak Silver Shlit about the laws of relationships between people, which will soon be published in Russian with G‑d's help.
White lie
This is a very difficult question, because when thinking about it, you can fall into casuistry and divide lies into good and bad, but a lie always remains a lie, just as the truth remains the truth. However, since our world is not black and white, but much more complex, there are situations when the truth can simply break a person. Example: a tragedy happened in the family - betrayal. The man realized that he was wrong and repented before God. Should he dump the truth on the head of his other half? After all, she can destroy the family and crush him himself. I would like to emphasize that I am not giving advice now, I am posing a question - including to myself. What should this person do? I think he needs to show some serious worldly wisdom to make the right decision.
A white lie, while remaining a lie, reminds us of the tragic imperfection of our world and humanity. It encourages a person to improve and correct the tragic situation that has arisen in his life.
How to eradicate the lies that have taken over all areas of our existence? This task was formulated very well and succinctly by the writer Alexander Solzhenitsyn: “... the simplest, most accessible key to our liberation: personal non-participation in lies! Let the lie cover everything, let the lie control everything, but let us insist on the smallest things: let it rule not through me!”
Choosing the lesser evil of two
During the war, many believers sheltered Jews in their homes and said that they did not have them. They were guided by the commandment to love one's neighbor (James 2:8), the Lord's command to lay down one's life for one's brother (John 15:13) and the commandment to save those taken to death (Proverbs 24:11). In this situation, they did not think about their own lives, but about the lives of others. What is called a “white lie” in the modern world usually refers to saving a comfortable state of affairs for oneself, rather than the lives of others, at the expense of one’s own.
No lie can honor the Lord, but the sinfulness of our world is so terrible that sometimes circumstances become such that untruth and faith can be contained in the same act. We see this, for example, in the story of Rahab.
In our fallen world, sometimes desperate situations arise when it may be right to do a lesser evil to prevent a much greater evil. However, it should be noted that such cases are extremely rare. It is very likely that the vast majority of people in human history have never encountered a situation in which lying was necessary.
The famous Christian writer Nikolai Vodnevsky has a very instructive story about this.
How to find the golden mean between truth-telling and insincerity?
The truth can be different, and a person cannot be ready for every truth. There is no point in chopping up the truth always and everywhere; no one needs it. Probably, we need to show wisdom here - it’s good if we have it. It is important to subtly feel whether a person needs the truth or not, how he will react to it, and most importantly, whether it will help him. There is no need to blurt out the truth, it is better to very subtly guide your neighbor to the right thoughts, structure communication so that he himself comes to what you want to convey. Your task is to give the right vector, to indicate the right direction.
No matter how sincere and honest you are, remember that good manners have not been canceled. You need to understand that telling the truth to everyone is not always appropriate. This does not mean that you need to lie, it’s just that the principle “I always tell only the truth, this is who I am” reaches the point of absurdity for some people. Let me emphasize: the truth should serve people. If she doesn’t change him, doesn’t transform him, doesn’t elevate him, then what is she for? To reassure yourself that you are the right one? But what's the use? Truth is needed for the sake of a person, and not for its own sake.
Speak the truth so that your neighbor can work on himself. If he doesn’t want this or is afraid of this work, don’t rush, the person may simply not be ready for it. Perhaps for a sincere conversation with him you need to prepare the ground, think about how close you are in order to open his eyes to something. In such situations, it is useful not to interfere in someone else's life, but to pay attention to yourself and figure out how honest your own life is.
Priest Oleg Chernichenko
