What to do with water and bread after 40 days after death: the origins of the tradition and the reasons for its observance today, features of the ritual and the attitude of the church to the offering of vodka to the deceased

Nobody thinks anymore about why certain rituals that are not directly related to religion are performed at funerals. That's how it is. That's what the grandmothers said - they know better from the experience of their years.

However, sometimes you want to figure out, for example, what a glass with liquid and bread on top symbolizes next to a funeral photo of the deceased.

Different interpretations of the ritual of offering bread and vodka

A shot of vodka at a grave or during a funeral meal can have several meanings, it all depends on what traditions were followed in the family. But it is also important to understand whether the custom has anything to do with Christianity and whether it is worth observing.

Offering to the deceased

This interpretation of the actions of relatives does not correspond to the tenets of Christianity. But Orthodox and pagan customs are still carried out simultaneously, the latter including the notorious glass of bread. Care must be taken that religious traditions have nothing to do with heresy. For this reason, water is often left instead of vodka. Then the custom does not harm the soul of the deceased. Water and bread should not be considered an offering, as the ancestors did; this is an outdated misconception.

Alms to God

Man is a sinner; he will pay for inappropriate behavior and thoughts at the Last Judgment. Relatives can help with prayer, good thoughts, and deeds. But they bring vodka and bread. They believe that in this way one can give thanks to God, which will allow the soul of the deceased to freely enter heaven. This is a deep misconception, which has the opposite effect: when they drink alcohol at a funeral, people commit a sin, and then hope for the forgiveness of the Almighty for the deceased.

No offerings, especially in the form of alcohol, will be able to reduce the magnitude of the vice; they will become an obstacle not only for the soul of the deceased, but also for the living when the time comes to appear before the Lord.

Vodka and bread for the traveler

Previously, there was another belief, which also had nothing to do with Christian canons: a glass of vodka was traditionally left on the grave, with bread placed on top. This offering was intended for a traveler passing by. He had to drink vodka and eat bread. In those days, this was considered the norm, many did it, especially the poor. Moreover, the funeral meal intended for the deceased did not harm their soul. It is believed that only the poor can take something from the cemetery without the risk of deterioration in health, because their souls are purer.

But today the tradition has lost relevance not only due to the strengthening of the Christian faith, but also due to the decrease in the number of people passing by the cemetery. Today, relatives and friends visit the graves, since these territories are closed and located far from communications. For this reason, no one expects a passing person to remember the deceased by drinking the contents of the glass. However, this custom marked the beginning of another: in order not to wait for a random passerby to remember the deceased, relatives and friends drink alcohol at the funeral meal.

Vodka at a wake

What you can and cannot do after 40 days

The soul completely leaves the body and earthly life after 40 days from death; there are rules regarding this period.

What can you do when the forty days of mourning ends:

  1. Pray. Prayers help the soul survive the contemplation of the trials of Hell and influence the decision of God's Court. The more prayers and kind words one hears about the deceased, the more lenient the sentence given to him. The deceased feels prayers, making it possible to maintain a spiritual connection between the deceased and the living. More often they order a church service - the magpie for the repose of the soul of the newly deceased. After 40 days after the death of a loved one - special prayers and memorial services.
  2. Distribute funeral treats, things, do good on behalf of the deceased. Those who accept the gift will remember the deceased and make it easier for the deceased to stay in the afterlife.
  3. Visit the cemetery. Do not forget about the grave after 40 days of mourning. They bring flowers to the grave, take care of it, and prepare for the installation of the monument.
  4. Remove fabric from mirrors and all reflective surfaces. Traditionally, when a person begins to die, reflective surfaces are covered with cloth. It is necessary that the soul does not appear in the reflection. When the mourning period (forty days from death) is over, the curtain is discarded.
  5. Take off mourning clothes. Relatives of the deceased are required to observe mourning for 40 days. Detection of grief involves wearing dark clothes, a black headscarf for women, no makeup, and no entertainment. After 40 days, all prohibitions are lifted.


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At the end of the forty-day mourning, the family of the deceased returns to a full life. There are prohibitions associated with popular beliefs and prejudices. Actions that cannot be performed after 40 days from death:

  • to grieve excessively for the deceased - the soul will not find peace;
  • remember the deceased with bad words;
  • install a monument (installation is allowed after 1 year);
  • drink alcohol at the grave of the deceased;
  • hold a solemn event a year after death;
  • color eggs red for Easter;
  • leave a photograph of the dead person in a visible place;
  • a widow should wash clothes on the day of the week when her husband died (for a year).

The Orthodox Church supports prohibitions and calls absurd rituals superstitions. Whether to follow traditions or not is an individual matter. If a person doubts his own actions, he should ask a clergyman for advice.

Symbolism of offering bread and water/vodka. When there is water in the glass, and when there is vodka

According to old traditions, different liquids are placed to remember the deceased: water and vodka. Both options have radically different meanings. So, if there is water in a glass on the funeral table or at the grave, this symbolizes the opportunity for the soul of the deceased to wash himself. It is believed that the disembodied spirit is purified in this way before leaving for the afterlife. In fact, this misconception is easy to refute: the body is prepared for the transition by ablution (the ceremony is carried out before the funeral), and the soul is prepared with the help of the prayers of relatives.

It is believed that next to the grave or photograph of the deceased there should be a glass of vodka and bread. This symbol means the joining of the soul of the deceased to the funeral dinner, farewell to life. Such a delusion can even be harmful: the soul should not return to worldly pleasures, be subject to temptation, and loved ones should not participate in this.

Many believe that the soul really comes on the day of the funeral (on the third, ninth or fortieth) to drink vodka and eat bread, since the amount of alcohol in the container is constantly decreasing, but the original volume of water, on the contrary, is preserved. But this phenomenon has an explanation: alcohol evaporates faster than other liquids, which is confirmed by the laws of physics, and not mysticism.

What does the ritual of vodka with bread symbolize?

In the Christian religion there is no mention of the ritual of a glass of vodka on the table for the deceased. This custom took root during the Revolution, when in 1917 the government actively eradicated faith in God in people, Bibles and icons were burned, and temples and churches were destroyed. As a result of this chaos, Orthodox traditions were partially replaced by pagan ones, and the tradition of putting food and drink on the table for the deceased took root.

Due to the absence of clergy after the Revolution, the old people told how to see off the dead on their last journey, and what rituals should be performed for the repose of the soul.

Different regions of the Slavic world have their own explanations and symbolism for this ritual. Old-timers claim that the ritual originated in ancient times and was strictly observed by the ancestors. Some say that in this way an offering is made to the deceased, while others claim that these alms are needed by God so that the soul can easily pass into another world and ascend to heaven.

There is also an opinion that a glass of vodka and bread is placed at the cemetery for those who walk through the cemetery. The traveler will be able to drink, have a snack and thus remember the deceased with a kind word. In the modern world, the ritual is compulsorily observed, and relatives leave offerings not only at the grave of the deceased, but also place vodka and bread on the funeral table.

How is the ceremony carried out after the funeral?

After the funeral, a memorial dinner should be held. Another cutlery is provided at the table - this is a tribute of respect, this is how they show the deceased that they are thinking about him and honoring him. There should also be a photograph of the deceased on the table. One corner at the bottom is tied with mourning ribbon. Place a glass of water in front of the photograph and cover it with bread. Sometimes they leave vodka in the glass. It is believed that you should do it at your own discretion: if the deceased did not drink alcohol during his lifetime, the glass should contain water or compote. They also place a glass of alcoholic drink on the grave.

Funeral dinner

What to do with the offering on the 9th and 40th day after death

There are several options:

  • the glass along with its contents and bread are placed after the funeral, removed after three, nine or forty days;
  • the offering left should be kept until the soul of the deceased ascends to heaven - after 40 days.

There is an opinion that you can add vodka if it evaporates. Others find it unacceptable. Once the alcohol has completely evaporated, it will be easier to decide where to put the glass and bread.

It is forbidden to place a glass of vodka in front of icons, as this is contrary to the laws of God.

Where to put water and bread after a funeral

Food intended for the deceased should not be thrown away with the rest of the garbage. This is a sign of disrespect for a deceased relative. After death, all objects, as well as food and plants that were in contact with the dead body, absorb negative energy, so you need to find out where to put the remaining products so that they do not harm the living. It is recommended to consider the following options:

  • alcohol/water is poured under a tree, or better yet, where no one goes, alcohol can evaporate ahead of time, so you don’t always have to think what to do with it; for comparison, some advise pouring vodka on a grave, but this cannot be done because of the contradiction Christian dogmas;
  • the bread needs to be crumbled and then scattered, you can next to the tree where the alcohol was poured, the crumbs will be eaten by birds, it is believed that this is an offering for the soul of the deceased, which it accepted.

Esotericists prohibit consuming foods left for the deceased; this can cause a serious illness or other disaster.


Feeding bread to birds

Where did the tradition of putting a glass of vodka with bread for the deceased come from?

Since ancient pre-Christian times, it was customary to bring food and drink to the grave of the deceased, in the form of an offering or gift. In paganism they believed that sacrificial food would appease the deceased, and he would not bother the living by coming to them in a dream. In those days, there was no concept that a person’s body irrevocably remains in the earth, and the soul ascends to heaven, and the only thing the deceased needs is the sincere prayer of relatives.

The widespread tradition of placing a glass of vodka covered with bread in front of a portrait is explained by the fact that the soul wants to eat and drink for the last time before leaving for the afterlife. For the deceased who did not drink alcohol during their lifetime, instead of vodka, water or compote was poured into a glass.

At the funeral table, relatives first of all fill a glass for the deceased and cover it with bread, which is a kind of snack after a strong drink. The glass is filled at the first wake, which is held on the third day after death, and it lasts until the 40th day after death. Many relatives change the contents of the glass for 9 and forty days.

With offerings such as vodka and bread, relatives show respect for the memory of the deceased and ease the fate of the soul, which until the fortieth day rushes between earth and heaven.

It is worth saying that this ritual is performed at almost all funerals, but is not approved by the church. The Orthodox Church recommends that instead of a glass of vodka and bread, you give alms to those in need at a cemetery or near a church.

How does the church feel about this?

The custom of placing vodka in churchyards is pagan and harms believers. You cannot indulge in such actions; it corrupts the soul and transfers the Christian burial rite into the sphere of mysticism and esotericism. It is necessary to replace such a ritual with things that the deceased really needs for the first 40 days after death:

  • prayers and memorial services: the kind words and thoughts of relatives are extremely important for the deceased, it is necessary to read prayers often, order memorial services, not only at the funeral, but also at other times;
  • kutya on the table is the main dish of the funeral meal, its significance is enormous, since wheat or rice symbolizes rebirth, resurrection;
  • good memories of the deceased - the thoughts of people and speeches at the wake are an important component, without which it is impossible to give rest to the spirit of the deceased, since he is nearby, can feel pain, anger, resentment and joy - all the emotions and feelings of loved ones, for the transition to the world of another soul of the deceased, the living must find harmony within themselves, then the incorporeal shell can calmly leave the earth.

What does the Christian religion say?

The Church does not approve of such offerings and is against remembering the soul of the deceased with alcohol. The human soul is not material and does not need food and drink, but an offering in the form of alcohol, on the contrary, defiles the soul. If you still want to observe the ritual, it is better to pour a glass of water instead of alcohol, covering it with a piece of black bread.

According to the Orthodox faith, the human soul, having freed itself from the bodily shell, goes through several stages of testing. And only the prayers of relatives will help ease the ordeal of the soul, as well as help it pass all the tests, but not a glass of vodka at the funeral table. And it is especially important to pray and order memorial services in the first forty days after death. Also, kutya must be present at the funeral table, the meaning and symbolism of which you will learn here .

The death of a loved one is always a tragedy for relatives who want to do everything possible to honorably see off the deceased on his last journey and observe all Orthodox rituals. In grief, it is difficult for people to make decisions on their own, and in this case, calling a funeral agent or consulting a specialist over the phone will help you. Our bureau will provide you with maximum assistance at any time of the day, organize a worthy farewell and prepare a funeral dinner taking into account Christian traditions.

Category: question-answer

What happens if you drink vodka from an offering?

Expert opinion

Lantsova Kristina

Esotericist

Today, almost no one practices eating foods that are left for the deceased. But if this happens, then only theory can be considered; in practice, it is impossible to know exactly what will happen. First of all, we should consider the situation from the point of view of religion - a person will normally tolerate vodka and bread that were left as an offering. But from an esoteric point of view, this cannot be done. This ban is due to the fact that food already contains negative energy and can cause harm to living things.

What kind of offering is given to the child?

Expert opinion

Lantsova Kristina

Esotericist

Vodka is not left for children. It is better not to take food to the grave at all. But it will be difficult to convince relatives not to perform the age-old ritual. For this reason, toys and sweets are left behind. The deceased will not be able to appreciate such a gift; the beggars will take it. This is acceptable, because children born in poverty have a pure soul and will not be affected by the negative energy of this place.

Offering to a deceased child

What to do with the funeral glass and bread after the funeral 40 days?

Expert opinion

Lantsova Kristina

Esotericist

If the tribute to tradition turned out to be stronger than religious beliefs, the Christian faith, relatives still leave an offering to the deceased. After 40 days, the grave must be properly cleaned. To do this, bread is given to the birds, and vodka is poured under a tree. Other actions can cause harm, especially to the living. If for some reason it is not possible to wait 40 days (for example, you are planning a trip), you can perform this ritual earlier.

How long should a stack of bread last after a funeral, how many days?

Expert opinion

Lantsova Kristina

Esotericist

If a person decides to adhere to the pagan tradition, then he must fulfill it to the end. Thus, it is believed that 40 days are enough for the soul to accept an offering in the form of bread and vodka or water. But it is not prohibited to hold food for 3 and 9 days. Everyone decides for themselves what period of time is sufficient for the soul of the deceased to accept the offering. Knowledgeable people say that you can determine how the deceased reacted to the meal by the quantity and quality of the food. If the bread has dried out and the vodka has begun to decrease in the glass, then there is nothing to worry about - the spirit is pleased with the offering.

What to do with vodka and bread left to the deceased?

Expert opinion

Lantsova Kristina

Esotericist

When food remains at the grave for a longer period than 40 days, then you need to deal with it in the same way as in the previously discussed case. The bread is given to the birds, and the liquid from the glass is poured under the tree. If a liquor is stored outdoors long enough, it will evaporate long before it is poured out.

What to do with water and bread immediately after the funeral?

Expert opinion

Lantsova Kristina

Esotericist

You can eat kutia at the cemetery. Moreover, this was previously one of the traditions - steamed wheat and honey were shared right at the grave. Today they bring the deceased not kutya, but water and bread. Moreover, no one consumes these products. You don't need to take them with you. Must be left at the grave. After the due date, it is permissible to remove the offering.

Water and bread for the bird-soul

A glass of water for the deceased, covered with a slice of bread, is left in the house until the forties. He can be in front of the portrait of the deceased at a wake, stand in the red corner or on the window. Its original, ancient purpose is not drink and food for the deceased, but a hospitable sign for the invisible bird-soul, which will wash its wings in the water and peck a crumb of bread. It was believed that “naўe”—the souls of the dead—could leave bird tracks. In the instructive Christian writings of the 12th – 13th centuries, exposing pagan superstitions, detailed descriptions of how in the Belarusian lands a bathhouse was specially heated in the evening, “as soon as they were washed up,” were preserved. Towels were left in such a bathhouse, and the floor was sure to be sprinkled with ashes. If the next morning they found traces of bird feet in the ashes, they believed that the souls of the dead were visiting and were happy. This ritual was preserved in the Vitebsk region until the beginning of the 20th century. The custom that has appeared in modern times of pouring not water, but vodka into a glass for the deceased, and covering it not only with a slice of bread, but also with a piece of lard, and even with a pickled cucumber, reduces ancient folk poetry to the everyday “drink and bite” and does not appeal to the soul. has nothing to do with it.

Organizing a funeral requires a set of actions that are carried out promptly, carefully, taking into account specific circumstances.

Funeral arrangements

Rules for seeing off the soul on the 40th day

According to Orthodox custom, on this day the relatives of the deceased must come to church. It is important that both the deceased and the relatives who come to the temple are baptized. At the church you need to submit a note “On repose”. It indicates the name of the deceased, as well as the names of other deceased relatives and friends. It is also necessary to light a candle for repose and say a prayer. If a funeral or memorial service is taking place in the church at that moment, you cannot leave it immediately. You should continue to pray and wait until the priest leaves the hall first.

It is advisable to place food prepared at home on the funeral table in the temple. This is almsgiving in honor of the deceased. You can bring cookies, sweets, fruits, wine, cereals, sugar, flour, vegetable oil. But it’s better not to come to church with meat, sausage, or fish. An obligatory part of the ritual is a visit to the cemetery on the 40th day. You need to bring flowers and lamps to the grave. Flowers can be either fresh or artificial. The main thing is that their number is even.

On the fortieth day, it is customary to sort through the things of the deceased person. Items that are dear to loved ones as memories can be kept with you. The remaining items should be taken to church or distributed to those in need. This is considered a good deed, which will be counted towards the soul of the deceased when determining its fate at God's Judgment. It is absolutely forbidden to throw things away.

Other important rules for seeing off the soul:

  • the main thing that relatives and friends need to do is to pray for the salvation of the soul of the deceased and ask the Higher powers to be favorable to it. This should be done not only on the fortieth day, but also in the future. This will help alleviate the fate of the deceased during God's judgment;
  • It is advisable to at least temporarily give up bad habits - for example, drinking alcohol, smoking, gambling. This is a kind of sacrifice in the name of saving the soul of the deceased;
  • during the wake you cannot drink alcohol, have fun, or sing songs;
  • mourning clothes must be worn. They don't have to be black, as long as they aren't bright or colorful. Calm clothes in muted colors will help you restrain your emotions, not become hysterical and not give in to despondency.
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